The text asked me to call him at home.
He probably considers himself a real gentleman for having the decency to call it off on the phone rather than a "the date's off, grandma" text.
I dutifully called and I also dutifully listened while he told me that he was going to cancel the upcoming date
Urgh, that's the most horrible thing about guys calling it off - they just keep talking. On and on and on! Dude! Just say "sorry, I'm not interested", I really don't give a flying monkey's about your career issues or latent homosexual tendencies!
Granted, it also irritates me when they just don't bother to call. I don't mind getting a self-important dump speech so much since it means I don't have to wonder whether I should feel bad about dating someone else.
they just keep talking
It's not me, it's YOU! No wait....
Yeah - that's the funny bit - he really thought he was being the perfect gentleman by attempting to explain his embarrassing dilemma of having several available and interested women who were agreeable to seeing him on the same night, and that I came last in the stakes.
Much better than not calling, I agree.
Ah well....better than being dumped by e-mail or txt specially in the middle of a very full-on and hot happening (yes, not long ago) and at least I didnt fancy him that much. No broken hearts this time at least, just a little wounded pride ;-0
I just use them to find out who will and wont take it up the pooper.
my god Tom, time on your hands or what?
Well, I was in the middle of doing a bunch of census analysis for work, so it didn't take too long to crunch a few other numbers and bang out a new graph.
You should see what I get up to when I really do have time on my hands!
Lets face it NZ is a giant school yard and the last time people publicly felt okay about asked each other out was in form two. Who doesn't remember the promise of a pash behind the bike sheds and a chain that turned you neck green? Sure the romances were short but boy were they sweet. Nowadays it is harder to get your mate to pass a note to the boy you like asking him to go round with you, so why not get online and do it yourself.? Dating needs to be encouraged, the typical kiwi 2am scramble doesn't make anyone feel special; it just means you happened to be in the right (?) place at the right time when the supermarket lights come on. I mean who hasn’t done the walk of shame and vowed never to do that again? The sex is always shit, you now have another person you have to studiously yet casually avoid and you are stuck with a monumental hangover.
Dating people however, is choice. Provided you both have the same dating etiquette. Surely it is not that hard to be interested and interesting, turn up on time, make an effort with your presentation, and approach the date realistically ie not as a mini marriage proposal! Not all women want to have babies in two years and not all men want chicks with big tits.
It is time for kiwis to take off their dating trailing wheels, get on the two wheeler and ride.
"I LOVE dating; Dating Rulz!"
Who doesn't remember the promise of a pash behind the bike sheds and a chain that turned you neck green?
Ohmigod - that was YOU?
Meanwhile, Any truth to the rumour you're on the next series of Dancing With the Stars Damian?
My sister met her husband at the Loaded Hog and is now about to have their second kid. They are astonishingly happy (perhaps because they never go to the Loaded Hog anymore).
Meanwhile, a friend of mine met her ex through NZ dating - he knowingly gave her herpes, cheated on her repeatedly, to the point of having a secret cellphone to facilitate it, and she realised in the end he was a textbook sociopath and left him. The only reason she's not back on the dating site is because she's about to leave the country for a new job.
Meanwhile, I met one of my first boyfriends on the early days' irc and we're still really good mates.
I reckon that for people who enjoy it when other people can spell over 50% of words properly, seeing how they choose to describe themselves and having the opportunity to sound somebody out via email is a really good option. Nothing wrong with it.
Yay for dating!!
behind the tin of Oak beetroot
Gary, if you have tins of Oak beetroot languishing in your cupboard, please send them to me here in the US. What a hug from home they would be!
I don't use Internet dating - married for a long time to a man I met in a pub - but I do use it as just another social forum. I met my platonic soulmate online, and I have another 3 very close friends that I met online in the last ten years (good old chatrooms, eh?). Stigma is as stigma does, I think. I've had years of people looking at me strangely when I tell them about meeting people from online, offline (or "in real life" as some sad f**** still refer to it). I've met nutters, and as I've said, lots of lovely people. And that's the thing about it. It really is just another social forum. What a large world it is, out there, and how much we limit ourselves if we don't explore it. Some people travel thousands of miles to see the wonders of humanity. I just have to sit at my desk. Oh, and I can wear my dressing gown whilst meeting all these people. How wondrous is that? And why would you not choose to use the Internet to meet people to date?
Might i suggest your clucky friends read this
Unrelatedly a good friend of mine described having a son as
being like 'having a flatmate who never cleans up or pays the
rent & is permanently on LSD'
Funny topic, and in many ways true, ive been on that site and here,s a few of my findings,
One was my ex which was interesting. Obviously no ones going to paint the dark or bad side of their character are they, but i do think a certain amount of honesty is required.
In her case , and i wont dwell on it, the fact that she,s bipolar, been on prozac for in excess of fourteen years, in a mental home on two occaisions ( before we met) and comes from a very weird family where here father sleeps with her friends is,, well, sort of "overlooked". But like most relationships it does take some time for the real person to emerge, it is afterall a game of "sell yourself".
Yet, i have met some interesting and genuine people on the site too, and now spending time with someone, so signed off. It really is a case of interpretation of the language used.
Fun loving, = get me drunk and i,m any bodies, look young for my age = i cant hold my head up against the weight of makeup i wear.
Reserved but given time i can express myself well = i have social phobias and suffer panic attacks, and have spent years in theraphy. Its my mothers fault, my fathers fault, but not my fault.
Not materialistic= no matter how good looking or charming you are if you turn up in an old car and dont earn 200k a year, dont message me.
Houswork is a nessesary evil= i,m an absolute slob incapable of motivating myself.
Regulary eat out= mcdonalds addict.
Average build= grossly fat.
Slim = anorexic
Talkative= self opinionated, bigoted.
Its just a numbers game, and one in which i,m so damn glad i,m a male.
I was getting increasing calls and emails from single girlfriends to look at different men on sites and tell them what I thought of these photos of the men in question.
I couldnt' believe the sloppy sites with crappy databases of users taking police line up photos and writing desperate profile headers to 'attract' others.
They would exchange a few emails with these strangers and then go out with them! No safety net, no reporting systems and most of these sites were for singles only.
So what does a girl like me who works online do.....?
Well, were I to develop a new site....these would be my top priorities...
* Technologically advanced = Virtual environment
* Safe, secure and well moderated = Closely monitored
* Not just for singles = ANYONE can come and socialise!
* FREE for users that don't want all the bells and whistles = 3 user levels including a FREE one.
*Virtual dating = an ice breaker between emails and meeting in real life.
* Ratings and reporting system for both Virtual and Real Life dating = Calendars for users to record all details of where they are going with whom.
Well it's taken 2 years and a crapload of money, but I did it and the feedback is awesome! I'm not here to advertise...I pay for that the proper way (hence me not posting the site address here).
Thanks to Susan Jeffers' book 'Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway'! I feel privileged to be able to bring this service to Kiwis and to be the 1st to do it in a virtual environment.
I even beat the Aussies to it!!!!!!