Cracker by Damian Christie

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Cracker: Wallywood

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  • Sacha,

    offensive tales won't sway the academy's judgement

    For them the truth would be offensive. Wealthy old white American men still have a lot of self-justifying to do and a rich history of nationalistic exceptionalism to defend, in which the movie and telly industries have played a big part. I'd take any such vote with a sack of salt.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    But I'm deriving great amusement from watching people get all hot and bothered about it, like it actually means something and that some great injustice has been perpetrated in the choice of 2010 winners.

    Amazing how quickly people forget that Ghost was once nominated for best picture. Or that Braveheart and The Return of the King won the award.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    Rich speaks truth. You watch the Oscars for the clothes, the occasional acceptance speech or host zinger that is funny and/or well-constructed, and bizarre cock-ups like Lady Kanye. If the award is actually well-deserved it's usually just a fluke or a bonus.

    expensive frocks

    I vote yes on the Zoe Saldana gown-of-purple-growths! Who's with me?

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    I vote yes on the Zoe Saldana gown-of-purple-growths! Who's with me?

    I vote for the Bjork dead swan!

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    I vote for the Bjork dead swan!

    Heh. That frock is actually a neverending thorn in my side, because I always *loved* it and thought it was fantastic and whimsical. And now it's just shorthand for 'total red carpet disaster'...

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    total red carpet disaster'...

    I too love the Bjork dress, and every year since I've lamented there's no one ballsy enough to try to trump her.

    On the Zoe dress, i could have handled the shower scrubbers on the bottom, if the bodice matched. But it looks like she's wrapped a skirt around a really nice cocktail dress.

    God, I love the way Danielle and I can make any conversation about fashion.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    And now it's just shorthand for 'total red carpet disaster'...

    But the Icelandic phrase for 'total red carpet disaster' also means 'total red carpet opportunity'.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • philipmatthews,

    Back on planet Earth, you might as well hate on the Pullitzer Prize jury as being a pack of out of touch elitists because the odds of Dan Brown or Stephanie Myer being on the shortlist this (or any other) year are somewhat remote.

    Well, not really. Brown and Meyer are much further from where the Pulitzer Prize is positioned than Avatar is in relation to the Oscars.

    Yeah, I would have preferred Deepa Mehta too.

    Or Jane Campion. Or Gillian Armstrong. Or -- impossible, I know, but I'd love to see this -- Catherine Breillat.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 656 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    I went for 'mansplane' (shit, that's another good one - huh!) in my WILLINGHOOD sign. Just trying to be helpful...

    As promised. MANSPLANE.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    I too love the Bjork dress, and every year since I've lamented there's no one ballsy enough to try to trump her.

    Cough....

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    Cough....

    Yeah, but Bjork still looked pretty.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    I like some of the ones Deborah shows - especially "Cultural Cringe" and "Hi Mum"

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder,

    According to press reports, members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences finally found a movie about the Iraq war they liked because it is “apolitical.” Actually, “The Hurt Locker” is just the opposite; it’s an endorsement of the politically chauvinistic view that the world is a stage upon which Americans get to deal with their demons no matter the consequence for others.

    From Robert Scheer's Article, An Oscar for America's Hubris.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 708 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    I vote yes on the Zoe Saldana gown-of-purple-growths! Who's with me?

    Oh. My. Fucking. God. Givenchy used to be the gold standard of understated elegance and impeccable craftsmanship, and even Alexander McQueen in full on Épater la bourgeoisie was (relatively) restrained and wearable. That thing Saldana was wearing? I'll put it this way: "haemorrhoids" should not be the first words to come to mind at the sight of a couture evening gown.

    The other comment I've seen is that it's quite telling that the first time a woman wins Best Director, it's for a film that is not only seen as a men's topic (however inaccurate that is) but is almost exclusively about men and male experiences.

    As I said over at The Hand Mirror, I don't know if I even want to start filling out that "not a real feminist" bingo card, let alone tease out the relationship with the geek-boy "eww! the bitches are getting their estrogen all over our nice clean genre" misogyny women like Bigelow, Gale Ann Hurd and Jane Espenson get on a daily basis.

    Actually, “The Hurt Locker” is just the opposite; it’s an endorsement of the politically chauvinistic view that the world is a stage upon which Americans get to deal with their demons no matter the consequence for others.

    Of course, it would be infinitely preferable if the Bigelows and Oliver Stones of this world obnoxiously mansplained "the world" to itself. Right?

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Uh, but they do - we're the scenery

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Julian Melville,

    I'll put my Pixies ticket up for grabs as well - GA at the Vector - because I fell down the front steps the other day and my ankle would really prefer I didn't go tonight. The rest of me is still keen, but it looks like the ankle will win out.

    I think my email addie's on the left there if you want it, $100.

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 200 posts Report Reply

  • Deborah,

    I like Bjork's swan dress too.

    New Lynn • Since Nov 2006 • 1447 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    Megan, we stride like a mighty fashion colossus over PAS! (It's a good thing that no one can see what I'm wearing right now. Let's just say that my current options are limited and leave it at that.)

    understated elegance

    Pfffft, Craig old chap. That would be awesome, if I wanted everyone to follow the advice of the Fug Girls (who, don't get me wrong, are immensely entertaining but SO CONSERVATIVE). I need someone to break out something weird and amazing on a regular basis, and I thought the Saldana frock did the job. Shit, Tilda Swinton wasn't even there! Who was going to let their freak flag fly otherwise? (I did say a resounding no to the Charlize Theron gown, though. You should not react to the sight of a red carpet frock with a completely unplanned cry of 'BOOBS!')

    I'll put my Pixies ticket up for grabs as well

    If anyone is up in the air about this: YOU SHOULD GO. Oh my god. Words fail.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    From last night:

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    Let's just say that my current options are limited and leave it at that.)

    I started work at 5am. I take no responsibility for what I am wearing.

    I need someone to break out something weird and amazing on a regular basis, and I thought the Saldana frock did the job.

    Ah, see I didn't. I just saw wierd and mismatched. But maybe that's because I haven't seen Avatar (gasp!) and don't know anything about her, so can't tell if she has the Swintonesque personality to pull off awesomely crazy.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Yeah, but Bjork still looked pretty.

    ...and, now I've wiki'd it, I see that the South Park boys were frocked up at the 2000 Oscars, and Bjork broke out the swan dress at the 2001 ceremoney.

    Which fatally undermines my ballsiness argument.

    Now, Wellywood.

    Has anyone done SRSLY? (the only real answer to to the question: 'how about we put a great big unoriginal hollywood-type sign on this hill'), or YA RLY ('I think it would be really great if we put a big unoriginal hollywood-type sign on this hill').

    Or even just FAIL

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Or Epic Fail - for the movie reference, not the beer, obviously

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    I need someone to break out something weird and amazing on a regular basis, and I thought the Saldana frock did the job. Shit, Tilda Swinton wasn't even there!

    Not arguing with you there - but there's a line between Tilda Swinton working designers like McQueen and Gareth Pugh with an extreme but coherent fashion-forward aesthetic, and Riccardo Tischi's "throw everything and the kitchen sink at the wall and pray something sticks" work for Givenchy. That might score a bare pass for a one day challenge on Project Runway, but this is working on a whole other level. Fugly mash-ups just don't cut it.

    And it is truly unforgivable that any woman should have to "make" a gown work. If an outfit is distracting from, or even working against, a woman's beauty then it has failed. Utterly and completely. Bjork's swan dress kind of worked not because it was bat-shit crazy, but because it worked with her own eccentricity. Lara Flynn Boyle looking like she'd just shot up in the disabled loo with the cast of Swan Lake -- not so much.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    And it is truly unforgivable that any woman should have to "make" a gown work. If an outfit is distracting from, or even working against, a woman's beauty then it has failed.

    Craig, have I told you recently how much I love you?

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • philipmatthews,

    From Robert Scheer's Article, An Oscar for America's Hubris.

    That's a great piece Jack, thanks for linking to it. From the right, we get a Telegraph column by Nile Gardiner which cheers The Hurt Locker's triumph as patriotism winning over anti-Americanism at the Oscars. Avatar is "one of the most left-wing films in the history of modern American cinema" and ...

    in essence a hugely expensive political statement against America’s leadership of the world, and the US-led war in Iraq. The Hurt Locker is not an overtly political movie, but it pays tribute to the tremendous bravery and sacrifice of American troops fighting in Iraq, at a time when Hollywood has produced a slew of anti-war movies.

    Suddenly I feel a little bit less surprised about the result.

    http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/nilegardiner/100028708/hurt-locker-vanquishes-avatar-patriotism-triumphs-over-anti-americanism-at-the-oscars/

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 656 posts Report Reply

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