We were driving through Tawa this afternoon and saw a female mannequin dressed as Santa in an op shop window. I pointed it out and started telling my wife about Emma's observation - Santa is a man but women perform most of the Santa work. Before she had even finished nodding in agreement, a little voice from the back seat said "wait, Mum is Santa"?
"wait, Mum is Santa"?
Oh John, I don't know why but I feel really guilty about this.
Even Roald Dahl was in on the action with this wee verse:
Where art thou, Mother Christmas?
I only wish I knew
Why Father should get all the praise
And no-one mentions you.
I’ll bet you buy the presents
And wrap them large and small
While all the time that rotten swine
Pretends he’s done it all.
So Hail To Mother Christmas
Who shoulders all the work
And down with Father Christmas,
That unmitigated jerk.
I was shushed down when trying to talk about the epistemology of Santa, but my eldest pretty much assured Mum he'd worked it out and wasn't fussed. But the younger one can still be scarred for life too soon, so ... right OK, Santa's not Mum, and he's a he. Like I care.
Not to fan any more flames, but I did say that recusing yourself is a valid strategy, and did make it clear that my personal strategy was my own. (Also, my family dynamics have changed dramatically in the last 30 years, thankfully.)
The passive-aggressive remark was more about individuals in general who participate, but complain and refuse to share the labour (and it was definitely gendered), not you personally.
Please don't feel guilty! After all, you weren't the thoughtless male who forgot his child was in the back seat..
Not being religious we have never celebrated christmas, we have always however celebrated Xmas - the capitalist holiday for buying lots of stuff for small children - and we have a family tradition of tying a $20 to the top of the tree to remind ourselves what it's all about (when we lived in the US we would put the tree out intact to be found by a wandering homeless person or the city crew that picked up the trees)
I was in a café the other day and at the table next to me a man was chatting to his woman friend. At one point she asked "So, are you having Christmas at X's?". He replied "Yes, I expect so". I was left pondering the mountain of privilege that lets someone be so vague about the details so (relatively) close to the event, and also picturing what it must be like when Christmas just...happens to you. Bloody relaxing, was my conclusion, assuming you're undisturbed by the sight of someone else working hard to plan and execute a celebration to which you've probably contributed zero.
Yeah, I thought it was a counter bug at first, too, but the answer seems to be that Sasha ≠ Sacha. (Hi to both!)
spelling sometimes counts, see
Thanks, I was deeply confused! Since you ask, Sasha was originally a diminutive for the Russian Alexander/Alexandra, so not a Romantic language. I can't speak for Sacha, however:).
Kia ora. Seems to work that way across much of eastern europe, so slavic or somesuch.