Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Eat Up Your Brothelly

186 Responses

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  • BenWilson,

    I agree. A lot of the time, you can't even give it away.

    You need a decent pimp, son. Pammy could square your mangina away 5 times a night for $240 an hour. Apparently.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    The strip shows could do OK but I wouldn't hold out much hope for the brothel side of things - if there was money to be made it already would be being made.

    Is there a mid-point in intimate-touching-allowed strip shows?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22825 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Is there a mid-point in intimate-touching-allowed strip shows?

    Yes, it's about halfway down the stairs with all your teeth missing.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    I remembered a petrol ad years ago that had a scantily clad young damsel thrust the bowser into the tank and the guyin the car wincing.

    So....I went searching on Youtube. I haven't found it yet...but I think you mgiht like it all the same.

    This is a cracker!

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1590 posts Report Reply

  • Dylan Mordaunt,

    There's a limerick in there but I'm just not talented enough to find it

    Bart, here's my effort:


    We want puppies and rainbows and chocolate and poetry
    We want men in muscle shirts- no weeners like pete doherty,
    They'd be sensitive and caring,
    They'd be romantic and sharing,
    Oh where, oh where is this man for me?


    It's left wanting I'm afraid; perhaps the Haiku?


    puppies and rainbows
    chocolate and poetry
    winter is over!

    Auckland • Since Nov 2007 • 20 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Just like the men's toilets then.

    Heh, yup. Not places that encourage lingering. As for spa pools in the general lounge area, just think about it. Are you going to get into a spa pool with a bunch of strangers, half of whom are unattractive old punters who like to pay for sex, the other half girls/guys who already have been paid for it, several times that night? In water that's been stewing this particular stew for quite possibly days on end? Even just stripping down to your undies in front of all the other punters is going to be enough to put off most people.

    Spa pools in rooms, sure, since they will really be "Spa baths" from which you could conceivably emerge cleaner than when you went in.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    Jackie: what I was thinking about was the time that I'd had a particularly bad night, was very upset, needed to feel better about myself, and so had sex with someone stupid. I'm thinking a sex worker would have been cleaner and simpler and morally much the same.

    Oh, I so agree, Emma. Been there, done that. If I'd paid the guy, at least I would have had some pleasure from the whole experience.

    And to our men friends here, who wonder at the business sense of a female brothel - I imagine that Pam Corkery will be pretty successful. A lot of women would pay for sex - indeed some already do, of course, and as Craig says, there is a demand for escorts to accompany wealthy women to do's and suchlike.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I wouldn't hold out much hope for the brothel side of things - if there was money to be made it already would be being made.

    I agree. A lot of the time, you can't even give it away.

    LOL There is always hope 3 4 10. Perhaps 10 4 3 ? ;)
    @Ben,
    Jeez, I knew male escorts back in 1981 in Auckland and price was not an issue.Some nights were to escort. Others were for sex. Simple as that.
    Also my friends house was a brothel before she purchased it. It was considered one of the most exclusive brothels in Auckland.Well known, the neighbours didn't mind and the clients had no problem visiting, so as long as it is done properly, why would it not work?

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    so as long as it is done properly, why would it not work?

    Only because it never really has in NZ. That's why women are lamenting the absence of the service. If they'd been putting their money where their mouths are, I'm sure there would be lots of male brothels. What's been stopping it? The law and the patriarchy? It was illegal for women too, you know. Money? Well that's as much of a blocker now as it ever was. Or is it just a highly select and small market? Good on Pam if she can corner it, but is there any reason to expect her to have a clue how to run a male brothel, given the virtual absence of any existing models here to work from, and no credible experience on her part? It's not like brothels don't go broke.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    It's not like brothels don't go broke.

    I suppose, but of all the brothels I know of, they have only shut because of community upheaval. I'd suggest they are a pretty stable business. For saying that ,if I wanted to do this, I would not open with fireworks.I suspect it will alienate some potential clients. still, who knows ? I would also make sure there is good parking.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    For saying that ,if I wanted to do this, I would not open with fireworks. I suspect it will alienate some potential clients.

    Doesn't Pam want to attach the brothel to a reality TV series?

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    TV series?

    Yes. So I reckon one hit wonder.Crappy reality TV, which I wouldn't be bothered to watch. Can't get behind all Truman like.Jus' sayin'

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    Doh!

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    I suppose, but of all the brothels I know of, they have only shut because of community upheaval. I'd suggest they are a pretty stable business.

    The demand is probably stable, but I'm not so sure about the management. I've heard of several women losing everything because they mistakenly presumed having been in the business they were qualified to run it. So they were back to turning tricks without the advantages of youth. Sex capitalism is a hard system.

    I would also make sure there is good parking.

    The only good kind for a brothel would be undercover. People recognize their friends' cars.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • David Haywood,

    I've often thought that they should have a brothel where the sex workers dress up as 'windows' from the television programme Play School. The round window, the square window, the arch window, the triangle window, and so on.

    I wouldn't visit it myself, but it would be cool just to know that it was out there.

    Dunsandel • Since Nov 2006 • 1156 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Yes. So I reckon one hit wonder.Crappy reality TV, which I wouldn't be bothered to watch. Can't get behind all Truman like.Jus' sayin'

    I know Rebekah Hay, Pam's production partner. She's quite emphatic that it's not a reality TV series, but a documentary about launching the business.

    You could argue whether that's really a documentary, but it seems they don't intend to make something ghastly.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22825 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Is that the ginger beer Rebekah?

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19706 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Is there a mid-point in intimate-touching-allowed strip shows?

    Yes, it's about halfway down the stairs with all your teeth missing.

    Okay, so I had to research this. On the internet.

    When it's women who are stripping for men in Western countries, the rule is almost invariably no touching.

    Not necessarily so when it's men stripping for women.

    While the internet videos of hen parties taking it in turns to fellate buff dancers are mostly staged with professionals, it seems that kind of contact is far from unknown in real shows in Britain and the US.

    One outfit, USA Hunks, seems to promote its show on the touch factor:

    As one of the girls described it, watching them is almost like watching, "a dirty boy band" perform. They've got choreographed acts and they lip sync, they just happen to also strip and be in incredibly good shape. The women at the club were rabid. There was screaming, yelling, clamors for private lap dances, and bills flying everywhere. And unlike female strip clubs, the women are actually encouraged to touch the male strippers as often and frequently as possible. It was quite the memorable event. I was particularly enamored with one dancer, Tyson, who kind of reminded me of a bald, Shemar Moore. The man was hot...and quite popular with the ladies based on the immediate raise in decibel level whenever he was on stage. He definitely knows how to work a crowd. Hunk-o-mania at club Element is quite the experience. I'd recommend it for a fun night out with friends or for birthdays, bachelorette parties, yada yada.

    Oddly enough, I think the customer review itself might be fake -- it seems replicated on several directory sites.

    But there are apparently-genuine accounts of more hardcore action at male strip clubs, as in this discussion of The Hunks.

    And from another thread on Britain's Female First website (SFW, but includes links to what I presume is some deeply NSFW video):

    i'm having my 18th in glasgow and my wee friends hav gott me a male stripper, he gonna do 2 shows, first one down to his gstrings, 2nd one full monty, not allowed to touch him during t show but i'm gettin a private peak and a chance to rub babyoil onto his big willy, cant wait cos i've never really seen a man in full glory b4, its gonna be a nite of fun, fun, fun

    So yeah, basically, it does seem that it can be different for the ladies.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22825 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Is that the ginger beer Rebekah?

    Indeed.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22825 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    She's quite emphatic that it's not a reality TV series, but a documentary about launching the business.

    Ok,so not so Truman, little bit Trumpy.? Still, look forward to your review RB. I'll pass.
    If it was like Play School, I might be tempted though.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Is it truly bizarre pop culture synergy that this thread went live the same day as Dollhouse -- which, when it hits it's stride in a few weeks, suggests the lines between madonnas and whores aren't always where you expect them to be.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    So yeah, basically, it does seem that it can be different for the ladies.

    Yup, that's a lot different. But it still sounds basically like stripping. The women who strip are also usually the ones with dancer-esque bodies, whereas prostitutes come in all sizes and shapes.

    I do think, however, that women might find that a lot more satisfying than men do, that their idea of what even constitutes a sex act to be quite different. And if they like it, well then, who am I to say "but that's just a strip show"? It sounds like a lot more fun (for them) than guys seem to have in brothels, by accounts.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Campbell,

    umm ... David .... rule34 ....

    Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 2620 posts Report Reply

  • FletcherB,

    emphatic that it's not a reality TV series, but a documentary

    Can I just check if I have this straight....If you film something that was going to happen anyway whether cameras were present or not, and present it in a completely straight (or possibly with a slight spin), but essentially factual manner....

    Thats not "reality", but documentary, right?

    Because "reality" is actually at least 90% fake?

    West Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 889 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    It sounds like a lot more fun (for them) than guys seem to have in brothels, by accounts.

    Okay, so I started this whole thing to try to deal with an icky generalisation, and now I think I'm going to make one. Everything in the sex industry seems to be different, tonally, atmospherically, when women organise it for women. The 'going to the toilet' analogy might be a good one: men go alone, don't speak, don't make eye contact. Women go in groups, chat, make it a social occasion. (Not, I have to say, women in groups I go out drinking with. I've never done this, find it really uncomfortable, but it does happen because I've had to endure sharing space with these groups.)

    When women go to strip shows it's not alone, lurking in a corner in a trench-coat, it's in big noisy groups. Women go to lingerie parties and sex toy parties. Now, I'm pretty sure we've got a fairly liberal, open-minded group here and that it would contain a few men who could manage handling sex toys and discussing sexual practices with their friends, but am I completely out of line in thinking this kind of social behaviour is more common with women?

    So maybe that's the key to making this work: to make it social. Make it somewhere women will go as a group, out of curiosity or whatever, and see how long before they're all, "Go on, Esme, gwooooon! Get some in ya!"

    I'm... not sure how this would gel with the Pammy's idea of giving the men deportment lessons and shit. They probably have something altogether more refined and discreet in mind.

    I... have informed the relevant professionals about Haywood's Windows fetish.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

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