Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: Will the grown-ups ever arrive home?

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  • fredster jones,

    not forgetting that relic...steve

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Attachment

    Along came…
    Let’s not forget Mr Jones is a master of equivocation and the hyperbolical ad hominem attack himself – the start to his last ‘column’ is a classic of the oeuvre:

    News broke that the Prime Minister, presumably exercising a perk of office, had seemingly hurled a coffee-shop waitress to the floor, then not once but twice, and regardless of his accompanying wife’s feelings let alone those of the other patrons, their children, two sensitive pet dogs and a wheel-chaired granny, violently had his way with her. Then emerging triumphantly from under the table wearing her knickers on his head, he’d searched around for fresh victims, before launching salivating and naked into the street in a quest for fresh flesh to commit his vile corruptions on.

    Now while this may sound like a personal fantasy on Mr Jones part – it in no way resembles the truth and seeks to belittle the facts of the affair – it purely seeks to stir emotion and desensitize the reader who may feel the stirrings of empathy that might otherwise arise in a straight reading of the events.
    Recently he was heard to pontificate that all beard wearers were wowsers – yet a photo of Bob Jones with a truly Mephistophelean beard does exist on the net (pictured with his younger brother Lloyd)
    Jones is not known as a team player but I have found at least one picture of him leading a posse of eager young men into a friendly version of the ‘beautiful game’

    (and as a footnote there are at least two PA ‘posters’ in this picture…)

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to fredster jones,

    a four-term key government.

    1: 'at the end of the day'
    2: 'actually I don't remember'
    3: 'whatever'
    4: 'Pfffftt'
    his four stock 'terms' are becoming progressively more incoherent.

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    Dal Boy.......unlike alfie, linger, rob and steve whose efforts are mildly commendable, your efforts are always, without exception, self-indulgent tripe

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    Upon re-reading, I have to admit your four-term key contribution is clever. See, I do call it as fairly as I am accurate.

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    actually, very clever Ian. Your turn to throw an olive branch into the mix.

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    3: ‘whatever’
    4: ‘Pfffftt’

    Trust you to come out with the fart joke Ian.

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • Roger Lacey, in reply to fredster jones,

    Dal Boy…….unlike alfie, linger, rob and steve whose efforts are mildly commendable, your efforts are always, without exception, self-indulgent tripe

    Have you read all 5466* of them?

    Whatakataka Bay Surf Club… • Since Apr 2008 • 148 posts Report Reply

  • andin, in reply to fredster jones,

    my core honesty and sharp wit…

    Oh what marvelous qualities, it is you have sire!
    You free to run a country. Squire?
    I hear there is one floating about somewhere
    not to far from your rear...
    I think
    Its pink. OH

    raglan • Since Mar 2007 • 1891 posts Report Reply

  • Roger Lacey, in reply to fredster jones,

    contributors to this site resort to vile ad hominem stuff

    Never find that sort of stuff on the right wing sites, do we?

    Whatakataka Bay Surf Club… • Since Apr 2008 • 148 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to fredster jones,

    self-indulgent tripe

    I am a ruminant*
    good to know that you recognise the underbelly of society when it's served up on a plate, I cud go on…

    *the second meaning of course!

    Your turn to throw an olive branch into the mix.

    Well thanks, but, I’m not sure that that’s how this narrative ‘arc’ works, unless those doves are building a ‘wickerman’… your pleas may be to Noah vail.
    <edited>

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    If you want to contribute to sites such as public address andin, you must learn to spell.

    A standard 3 spelling qualification is just not good enough.

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    I have to say clever again ian

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz, in reply to fredster jones,

    Mate, one of the basics of the English language is where you do and don’t use capital letters. The first letter of a name is one of those places.

    Another basic of using social networks is knowing when you are welcome. You aren’t. Fuck off.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 5550 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    Wht ds "dn'r" mn rch? Y bttr pnks mst py mr ttntn n yr spllng clsss

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to Roger Lacey,

    Attachment

    Have you read all 5466* of them

    I'm thinking of getting a T-shirt done
    - maybe like the Beagle Boys ones...

    *and counting - but not - his story repeating...?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • fredster jones,

    Wll dn Rch. Gt t rght t yr scnd ttmpt.

    auckland • Since May 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    I’m thinking of getting a T-shirt done
    - maybe like the Beagle Boys ones…

    Still impressed after all these years by the classy machine-knitted Beagle Boys jumpers that early Proud Scum sported. Way before orange was the new black they had the colour matched perfectly.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to fredster jones,

    Blue meanies...

    You bitter pinkies must pay more attention in your spelling classes

    I'm from Sydenham, a magickal place where spells are done by the 'working class' - nothing as big as The Babalon Working* mind you ...

    *and Jack Parsons was an actual Rocket Scientist!

    All language is magic.

    spell check:

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • nzlemming, in reply to Roger Lacey,

    Have you read all 5466* of them?

    That is so, so weird. I suspect shenanigans...

    Waikanae • Since Nov 2006 • 2937 posts Report Reply

  • Rosemary McDonald, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    All language is magic.

    Don't waste your wit on twits,
    Don't waste your wit on twits,
    Don't waste your wit on twits,
    etc.

    Waikato, or on the road • Since Apr 2014 • 1346 posts Report Reply

  • andin, in reply to fredster jones,

    There is a standard 3 spelling qualification?
    Who knew...
    Oh, you.

    raglan • Since Mar 2007 • 1891 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to fredster jones,

    a man of consonant sorrow

    Wll dn Rch. Gt t rght t yr scnd ttmpt.

    It started with a 'turd'
    and turned into
    a 'vowel movement'

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report Reply

  • John Farrell,

    A man of constant sorrow

    Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 499 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Considering the title it's ironic where this thread has gone.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

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