Cracker by Damian Christie

Fits and Starts

Anikwalicanwithagun...

Nameannienummeranimcunnaberon...

'Cos she…dum dah dah dah dah...

...She speeeeeeeeds

Aloosarinanideinanyestelinaway...

There’s nothing quite as funny as listening to the crowd singing along at a Straitjacket Fits gig. Well actually, there’s plenty of things just as funny, funnier even, but I’m not writing about them today.

The point being, to a greater or lesser extent, no-one knows at least half of the lyrics to your average SF song, but it doesn't stop them singing along anyway. At least at the Dawn Service they hand out lyric sheets.

I know it’s a few days after the fact, but I’m conscious Shayne and the lads are playing Wellington this Friday and Saturday, Christchurch and Dunedin the week after.

So my thoughts. Well, they’re all good. Apart from the tosser in front of me who thought it was amusing to shout “Who’s going to sing Down In Splendour?” Well, no-one is, you pillock, surely that was pretty bloody obvious to anyone with half a brain. Oh hang on, you were being funny, because Andrew Brough isn’t there anymore? I get it. No, actually, you’re still an idiot. An idiot who then proceeded to sway annoyingly in front of me so that I couldn’t get a clear view without swaying in the opposite direction at the same time. Tosser.

That aside, what a gig. The frontman’s rock ‘n’ roll charisma was such that I heard more than one (presumably hitherto straight) guy in the audience mutter, “Shit, I’d do him”. Perhaps it was the haircut.

Understandably, most of the crowd were there to reminisce. The average age was such that even those of us who are “pushing 50” wouldn’t have felt out of place. But while there was plenty of opportunity for tripping down memory lane, there were no cobwebs on the 'fits. “Age shall not weary them" indeed.

I won’t go into the set list or such, because there are plenty of anorak wearers out there who have already done just that.

Suffice to say, they rocked, and if you’re south of the Bombays and have the opportunity to head along this or next week, attendance is heartily recommended. If you didn’t make it, or can’t, then all I can say is: Sucks to be you. Except in my mind, it’s sung to the tune “If I Were You”.

Just a reminder: If you live in Auckland and haven't yet, the Ans Westra exhibition is waiting for you. If you're not, you can still check out my interview and look at the pretty pictures...