Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Isn't It Romantic?

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  • Jackie Clark,

    We are both also people who are very secure in and happy with our own bodies. At least with me this is an attitude which has been largely untouched over a range of twenty-five kilos, several dress sizes, and twenty years. It's about what's inside your head, not what's on the outside of your body.

    Oh, absolutely. It's such a rare thing in women, I find. This sense of self and knowledge that the essence of you is unchanged while the rest of the world churns themselves into angst about the way they look. That's what others find attractive.

    We do both have fabulous tits, though.

    Me too, me too. Unfettered and free. Actually, the unholstered and brazen state of my breasts is very much a metaphor for my sexuality in my 20's. Others feel discomfited by how freely my breasts move through the world, and refuse to see how they don't get in their own way. I, on the other hand, don't comprehend how other women can have bought so easily into the myth of the brassiere. Support? Pah. That's what friends are for, not bras.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Michael Savidge,

    Surely this gets the juices flowing in a few readers...


    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report Reply

  • Mrs Skin,

    Would this be an opportunity to mention the Consortium of Pubgoing, Loose and Forward Women?

    Indeed it would. Thank you, Stephen.

    the warmest room in the h… • Since Feb 2009 • 168 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen,

    re slut

    only and always by women in the offensive sense

    Well that's because for guys, slut is only derogatory in the sense of

    "why won't she be slutty with me?"

    In all other cases it's a good thing :).

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 4458 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    has anyone ever been to a singles bar in the US (or anywhere else for that matter). And, if so, how does it differ from, say, going down the Loaded Hog on a Friday night and trying to score?

    Way late here but I have a moment.....I visited a bar in San Francisco one holiday and I went to the Loaded Hog once so my observation of difference would be, the Hog is one of the most disgusting places I have ever visited therefore not a place worth waiting to be "scored" and San Fran by way far was excellent. All the Jamaicans I met were really friendly without being in ya face and the drugs were gooood. Actually I take back the in ya face bit. :)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    A public library I used to frequent marked all their risque books with a purple spot

    When I was about 12, I picked out what I thought was a romance novel from under my parents bed( hey, I found A Clockwork Orange under there) and "The Story of O" was probably why I didn't continue to read romance and probably why I don't do Valentines, not that I don't still have morbid fascination for other things though :)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I use "slut" as a friendly greeting to my best girlfriend as in Hey slut, and hers will be Hiya slut and then we continue without a concern for anyone else hearing or caring what they may think. It is our way of saying "still going strong and still happy I guess. I also enjoyed the one night stand period in my life which could well have been in the "queen of" category. I mean how else will you find the one you do want to live with for the rest of your life? Oh and the tit bit, bras can be handy for the spontaneous go for a swim thing

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • mark taslov,

    I'm sorry, did you just use the term 'boff'? is that onomatopoeia?

    Te Ika-a-Māui • Since Mar 2008 • 2281 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I'm sorry, did you just use the term 'boff'? is that onomatopoeia?

    I did, and I hadn't thought about that. It's a wonderfully evocative word, and I don't know where it comes from except that it appears to be British - my US friends don't recognise it, but I've seen David Tenant play Marry Boff Kill.



    I love a good bra, or good corsetry. (I can take a moment to plug a friend, so I shall.) The combination of frivolousness and practicality is very appealing.

    Also, my partner and I just had a long conversation about whether we could photograph me with handcuffs, slave collar and a packet of green onion chips. The consensus was that we could but we shouldn't.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    The consensus was that we could but we shouldn't

    Spoilsports, the both of you. :)

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19706 posts Report Reply

  • stephen walker,

    would that be a reprise of your Green onion Slave Girl cameo?
    or have i got my electrical cord, i mean handcuffs, crossed?

    nagano • Since Nov 2006 • 645 posts Report Reply

  • liam,

    When I was a librarian (assuming one ever quite stops being one) I read the last 2 sentences of every romance that was returned for a week. Furthermore, I got a number of the other librarians to also do so - and keep records of what happened in that sentence.

    After day one, we did the last 2 sentences.

    In the last sentence the protagonists kissed (IIRC) in something over 50% of the book. It was up in the high 90% in the last 2 sentences.

    I also knew (as did the other librarians that were interested in the work, as opposed to the paycheck) what sort of books any regular patron read, including what authors you might like etc.

    That's part of being a librarian (IM(ns)HO) - understanding your customer base, and your collection. Those who work in a library and take no interest in either the books, or the usages of said books are some form of clerical workers, perhaps even shelvers - but I'd be hard pushed to call them librarians.

    NC, USA • Since Oct 2008 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Sayana,

    Back in the late '80s, I had my first summer job, indeed my first library job at Nelson Public Library adding the books to the computer database. Each morning every member of staff had to spend some time tidying their particular assigned section. And each day, we would play "Hunt the 'Joy of Sex'". Almost every single day, someone would remove it from the shelf, and hide it within another book so they could read it without anyone noticing. It was frequently located nestling inside an Asterix, or within the pages of an encyclopaedia...

    Anyway, later on as a Library Assistant, my favourite part of the job was keeping track of what people were reading and introducing them to new authors.

    Since Sep 2008 • 50 posts Report Reply

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