Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Also, The Rain Isn't Gone

65 Responses

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  • Danielle,

    Okay, that's never happened. I mean... how lost can you get?

    If you have a retroverted uterus the cervix can be quite difficult to get to, I think? Which is, you know, great. Because being scraped with a little bottle-brush up in your ladybits isn't uncomfortable enough already, without having to get all Jamie-Lee-Curtis-in- Perfect contorted.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    I don't think there's anything funky with my uterus (someone would have noticed somewhere over the course of two pregnancies surely) and my cervix has been perfectly well locatable on other occasions but, that one time, it took two nurses, a doctor and a lot of waving my legs in the air.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report Reply

  • Karen White,

    That Perfect vid is almost NSFW! John's shorts, Jamie's high high high cut leotard......but mainly John's shorts

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 79 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    without having to get all Jamie-Lee-Curtis-in- Perfect contorted.

    They shouldn't be shaking their heads around like that. We did too much of that in the 80's. I'm convinced that's why I have horrid vertigo from time to time. You never read about shaken head syndrome, do you?

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

  • Don Christie,

    They shouldn't be shaking their heads around like that.

    Nevermind their heads. JT's sugar lumps were a tad off-putting.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1645 posts Report Reply

  • Heather W.,

    They shouldn't be shaking their heads around like that. We did too much of that in the 80's. I'm convinced that's why I have horrid vertigo from time to time. You never read about shaken head syndrome, do you?

    There have been studies. It's been in the British Medical Journal, according to Cosmos Magazine

    North Shore • Since Nov 2008 • 189 posts Report Reply

  • icehawk,

    Emma,

    I took a picture of my grandad at his 90th with his 7 siblings. The photo shows that 6 of the 8 had white canes, coz they were blind. They went blind after the age of 40. Glaucoma.

    If it's caught early it's very treatable these days. So while I find eye-tests (and especially those puffer-tests) a real pain, I go regularly as clockwork. Don't put off that followup. Not even a little bit.

    It's that vision thing.

    icehawk

    Wellington • Since Sep 2008 • 49 posts Report Reply

  • icehawk,

    May explain why I am a tad bit overdue for a smear."

    Isabel,

    My partner went for 6 years without getting around to a smear. If she'd left it another year she'd probably be dead. And I'd be raising the kids on my own. Seriously. No shit.

    I hope you find that scarey, coz I'm trying hard here. It scared the hell out of me.

    My comments seem to have a theme, but:
    Don't die. Get around to it.

    icehawk

    Wellington • Since Sep 2008 • 49 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    My comments seem to have a theme, but:
    Don't die. Get around to it.

    icehawk

    Maybe we should set up some kind of Pledge-bank-style 'nag a blogger into getting a check' thing. (I am also hideously overdue for being wedged open with a door-stop.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Stewart,

    I trust they no longer use a speculum fresh out of the fridge.

    Us blokes only have to have a finger up the bum now & again after turning 50 to check the prostate. Makes it a bit difficult to look your doctor in the eye immediately after teh 1st one.

    Te Ika A Maui - Whakatane… • Since Oct 2008 • 577 posts Report Reply

  • Kerry Weston,

    (I am also hideously overdue for being wedged open with a door-stop.)

    urkle....ancient memory stirred of IUD insertion. Kicked the doctor in the guts for his trouble. Hey, he shoulda warned me how much it was going to to hurt. Note from mother: keep your feet to yourself, you know what happens to stroppy wimmin.

    Manawatu • Since Jan 2008 • 494 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    urkle....ancient memory stirred of IUD insertion. Kicked the doctor in the guts for his trouble. Hey, he shoulda warned me how much it was going to to hurt. Note from mother: keep your feet to yourself, you know what happens to stroppy wimmin.

    Oh lawks. I remember the bloody things well, Kerry. And for a woman who's never given birth it was a rude shock indeed.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

  • Dinah Dunavan,

    I was born with eyelashes that curled into my eyes rather than out. After a few months of misery they (whoever they were) worked out why I had such red eyes and operated. I've been told the doctor cut out the eyelashes and turned them around.

    Every now and then an eyelash grows the right way (which is now the wrong way) and pokes me in the eye.

    I now go everywhere with tweezers and a mirror so I can pluck any offending eyelash out. You'd be amazed at how easy it is to get used to having things poked in your eyes if the end result is removing a scratchy eyelash. Just got rid of a couple this afternoon.

    Dunedin • Since Jun 2008 • 186 posts Report Reply

  • Kerry Weston,

    Yes, aren't they hideous? Had to have been dreamed up by a misogynist. It was pre-kids for me, too, I'd been on the Pill for ages and thought I'd better have a break.

    And I thought I was the only one who memorised the eye chart for my driver's license! Actually, I figured out I needed glasses when I didn't see a car coming the other way, in an overtaking manoevre... lucky I had a special squeeze button on the dash to shrink the car.

    Manawatu • Since Jan 2008 • 494 posts Report Reply

  • Kerry Weston,

    yeh, my last post replies to Jackie, does not refer to ingrown eyelashes designed by misogynists. as you were.

    Manawatu • Since Jan 2008 • 494 posts Report Reply

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