Posts by Paul Campbell
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Those headlines 'police raid discovers $N million worth of drugs' have always seemed bogus to me - I mean is there a part of StatisticsNZ that does a monthly street price survey? - I kind of imagine a Beavis&Butthead "nyuck nycuk nycuk - I sold that guy a tinny of oregano for $500, he was so obviously a nark man"
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there you go - someone can do way better than "let's fuck"
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Stephen - well I've been married for 20 years ..... but I have teenaged kids so it's an issue I have thought about/talked to them about recently.
Yes you need to talk - and at a difficult time when you're both trying to be too cool/not too crass, and are being quite tentative - just the sort of time when misunderstandings are more likely to happen (and add a bit of alcohol ....) - it would be nice to have something better than "let's fuck" - but I do think you have to be direct
Certainly you do if you're thinking of dating my daughter ....
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yes it is - I think that if you don't you leave yourself open to misunderstandings and you may commit rape without realising it - you need assent from your partner (as does he/she from you).
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I think that you are responsible for everything you do when you're drunk - simple as that.
But I agree there's an issue what if you're both too drunk to give consent - are you both guilty of rape?
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Well obviously "no" means no
But as Deborah said: not saying "yes" means no - that means you have to ask and get a reply - if you can't ask the answer is probably no
Finally I'd add if the other person can't make that determination (even if they say "yes") because of alcohol or drugs or age or mental impairment (that other sad, bizarre case from this weekend comes to mind) then it also means no - and not only do you have to make that judgment but you have to be responsible for making the wrong one - you're still responsible for making the right choice even if you're too drunk
And anyone can say "no" at any point, even after they say "yes"
"Boys will be boys", "too much testosterone", "I was too dunk" etc etc are just words - they are not excuses
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I think you can seldom fault someone for reporting a crime to the police no matter what their motives, while I understand the reluctance of a victim to come forward they shouldn't be the only one to able to make that call - If looking out my office window here and I see a rape happening on the other side of the fence I'll call the police, if I find someone dazed and wandering the streets I'll take them to the hospital and they may call the police (might do it myself too just to cover my own arse)
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Shep - I'm confused - are you proposing more drunks in bars?
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IMHO the whole Duke Lacrosse incident was all tied up with race in a way that may not be so obvious from a NZ viewpoint
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Well that makes sense for people that are actually guilty (assuming there are) - for the others it's in their long term interests to come clean and talk to the police - otherwise they're tarring all rugby players with the unresolved accusation. More likely though they're sucking it up and closing ranks 'for the good of the team' etc etc
Is there a rugby equivalent to the "thin blue line" - thin brown line?