Posts by Russell Brown
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Speaker: Talking past each other:…, in reply to David Hood,
Oh well, seeing as you're discussin' ....
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Does anyone mind if I close the thread?
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Sacha, sorry, I've deleted your comment. I don't want to read what someone is saying about me on Twitter, because it's probably hurtful. This is kind of depressing and I'm over it.
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Speaker: Talking past each other:…, in reply to Danielle,
Yeah, once we get to the stage where you’re gaslighting me for disagreeing with you, there aren’t too many other places to go.
I wasn't. I did worry that you'd have a go at me for the comment and tried to make light of it. I'm sorry. I'm going to watch TV with my family.
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Speaker: Talking past each other:…, in reply to Danielle,
Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to get the full “bitch be crazy” treatment sometimes. Just so I can be reminded of where I stand.
That’s not what I said and I honestly don't know what to say now.
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Access: The Meltdown, in reply to Russell Brown,
My biggest issues are around triggers; in the last two years I’ve been assaulted on the streets twice, and gone through some huge personal issues. I do not forget, and in the wrong situations I can feel like I’m endangered all over again. Off goes my brain into the blender.
As much as I want my son to be out and about, and I trust his general street-sense, I dread this so much.
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A Facebook comment on this post from Troy Rawhiti-Forbes:
Okay, starting small. I find public transport hassles - be they by road, rail, or runway - to be disruptive but not to the point of meltdown but that's because I've been conditioned to expect failure, because it happens so frequently - and I think I find a certain comfort in powerlessness. If there's nothing I can do about a service I generally find to be unreliable, I'm not going to be shaken by that.
But if a new regular shows up and has a preference for my preferred seat - the only seat, as far as I'm concerned - then I'll silently hate their disruptive guts. I don't like what it does to my morning, I don't like that every journey will become a contest. It makes me very uncomfortable, but I'll live through it.
Being diagnosed and getting good support means I'm less prone to meltdowns than I ever was before. I may not like what's going on, but I can generally deal with the ridiculousness I'm seeing in a situation.
My biggest issues are around triggers; in the last two years I've been assaulted on the streets twice, and gone through some huge personal issues. I do not forget, and in the wrong situations I can feel like I'm endangered all over again. Off goes my brain into the blender.
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Access: The Meltdown, in reply to Sacha,
Passive-aggressive arguing styles set me off, I’ve noticed. Getting better at walking away. It actually feels quite like being a kid again, overwhelmed by rage and confusion.
I had an interesting discussion on a Facebook group once about an identity-politics-oriented ASD rights post that had been shared.
What was being touted seemed to be incredibly perilous to anyone without a fairly high-level feel for rhetorical politics and a knowledge of when to back out. Full of the usual fishhooks and gin traps. Basically, nothing I'd feel safe letting my kids near.
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Access: The Meltdown, in reply to Sacha,
I’ll never be a tory :)
And they say you aspies have no empathy :-)
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Way back in 2001, I was asked to chaperone John Peel and his wife Sheila. They were lovely people.
But I gradually came to think that John was neurodiverse in some way. Not just "how else do you maintain that level of nerdiness?" but a couple of specific incidents.
The first was when we were due to go on stage at The Classic for an onstage interview event with bFM. John arrived and subsequently realised that he'd left his camera in the taxi on the way there. And he got anxious and upset – like, to a neurotypical, unreasonably upset. I basically had to talk him down to the stage, whereupon everything was fine. (I noted that his manner was precisely the same onstage, on the radio, or over a pint.)
The other was when I happened to be around to see them off and Sheila gave me a big hug and invited me to the farm (I never did take her up on that) and so I attempted to hit John goodbye too. I realised then that he was seriously not a hugger and it was very awkward. I think she was his social manager, basically – not an uncommon arrangement.
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