Posts by Lilith __
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to Hebe,
One of my old friends has a one-hour rule for his wife’s rellies: he goes to everything then leaves after an hour, no exceptions. He says that after 30 or so years they all accept that’s what he does and attribute it to his foibles rather than theirs -it suits everyone.
That sounds like an excellent solution. It's much easier to all be friendly if it's for a limited time. Look at what happens to so many families at Christmas - too much time together.
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to Isabel Hitchings,
I have known missing stairs with poor social IQ, pain causing conditions that make them short tempered, or difficulty hearing. What makes these people missing stairs is that, instead of finding coping strategies for themselves, they out-source the problem so the people around them have to make all the accommodations.
So much this. Thank you Isabel.
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I've known Missing Stairs who aren't bigots at all, just people with very low social IQ who blunder about annoying people, for instance by being unbearably patronising. They may be basically nice people, but they're the ones you invite out of a sense of duty rather than pleasure.
On the subject of partners: one of my exes is a very introverted person who could be happily sociable for a limited time, after which point he became morose, irritable and easily offended. He was known for storming out of social gatherings, which I found hard. But it was "just his way".
I wish we'd been able to work out some sort of system to avoid the difficulty, like setting a fixed time limit, or him giving me a signal that he'd had enough, before it became unbearable. -
Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to Heather Gaye,
’So what did they take? … Because it looks to me like it’s all still here”.
OH I WANNA HIGH-FIVE THAT SO BAD
+1
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When people use terms like "Those People" I tend to become speechless with anger, and have to walk away. However my less-flighty sister has shown me how standing and asking, straightfaced, "what do you mean?" and "why do you think that?" is also a good response. Some bigots do actually get embarrassed when they have to explain their views to a politely uncomprehending person.
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Legal Beagle: Gordon Campbell…, in reply to Graeme Edgeler,
I’d like to see Graeme answer Gordon’s reply, particularly to give his response to Gordon’s main point about the erosion of democracy.
I have answered Gordon’s reply as a comment to his piece.
Oh right, cheers.
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Legal Beagle: Gordon Campbell…, in reply to Craig Ranapia,
telling him to STFU and be a good team player. When does that ever end well?
Sorry Craig, but where is anybody saying that? The only one trying to close down discussion seems to be you.
I’d like to see Graeme answer Gordon’s reply, particularly to give his response to Gordon’s main point about the erosion of democracy.
I’m all for fisking and debate. Although I find it odd that the title of this post is a person’s name, not the actual topic. It makes the post seem like a personal attack, even if it is not.
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How fascinating, thank you! I also pored over that news report. She parked up in the driveway of her old home in Mt Maunganui, and then stopped! Such a purposeful journey, and she must have driven fairly competently all that way.
I'm sure states of consciousness are much more complex than awake vs. asleep.
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Capture: Upside Down, Inside Out, in reply to Ian Dalziel,
some sort of eponymous colonnade…
ROTFL
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Up Front: Everyone is Wrong. And Right. Whatever., in reply to BenWilson,
Does she realize that “Gentleman’s Club” is a synonym for brothel?
Not in conventional usage. Which is clearly what is meant here.