Southerly by David Haywood

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Southerly: E=mc^2... Your Views

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  • Kerry Weston,

    To True Blue (Pakuranga)

    I wouldn't be too quick to let that cat out of the box if I were you. Some biology boffin (another one of these Einstein types) at Auckland University* says cats have their own brand of HIV - Feline Immunodeficiency virus (FIV) - one in five feral cats have it, so how long will it be till all our housecats, boxed or not, get it?? The potential for species crossover is unknown, he says. It has never happened but that doesn't mean it won't. And what i want to know, is who gave puddy-cats HIV? Is nothing sacred?


    * Allen Rodrigo interview, p. 10 Listener, 7-13 Feb.

    Manawatu • Since Jan 2008 • 494 posts Report Reply

  • Grant Stone,

    Good news everybody!

    While there seems to be no way to make the Herald's Your Views page go away entirely, you can at least cover it with unicorns and sparkly rainbows!

    Now if I can just find a way to do the same to 3 News...

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 30 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    StillRenting (Ponsonby)

    i wuz told that light had wave and particle properties owning two properties is GREEDY especially when there are some of us who have been saving for AGES and stil cant afford anywere DECENT!!!!11!!!1!

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    owning two properties is GREEDY

    Rofflenui!

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    I can't get over how much this thread rocks. I wish I could think of anything half as good as these.

    I also wonder if this could get meta, if someone brought it to the Herald's attention? 'David Haywood's Parody of Your Views - Your Views'.

    Resentful (Dannevirke)

    It's all very well for these chardonnay socialists to sit up there in their ivory towers mocking us average Kiwis. Russell Brown has never been the same since he left Timaru anyway.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    I can't get over how much this thread rocks.

    Totally agree. Neighbours probably think I'm disturbed, what with all the rolling on t' floor. Fecking hilarious. Bravo all.

    Danielle, I don't think granny does meta, but Sideswipe might be the go..

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    Kirikiriroa (Hamilton)

    Some people obviously cling to relativity as an article of faith. I learned from my many years in journalism to apply a modicum of skepticism to such claims. It amuses me to see how upset some, even scientists, become when you challenge their dogma of relativity. Why, just the other day I was on the train platform, welcoming my daughter. We had synchronised watches that morning and in defiance of the predictions of relativity, our watches still read the same time, and she was no younger than one would expect. I'm afraid I will never be swayed by scientists or their religious and fanatical supporters who can't deal with the evidence that any skeptical person can see for themselves.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Grant Stone,

    ClenchedJaw (Howick)
    When I tried to chop down the pohutakawa in my back garden to make room for a new carport, I got a visit from the police! Why aren't they out stoping all the boy racers or peddoes or something?

    Then my neigbours put up this bloody ivory tower and I cant get sky anymore. Who gave them resource consent for that? And they're all on the dole, I bet. But if I tried to subdivide my section to put ten flats on it, i bet it would take a hundred years to get approbal! Didn't we fight a war to stop communisim?

    Bugger you lot. If John Key doesn't give me a tax cut RIGHT NOW I'm off to the Gold Coast. Or Dubai. They know how to treet boy racers in Dubai and I can chop down all the pohutokawas I want!

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 30 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Spiky Simpleton, Singapore
    But what about the brain drain? As an incredibly talented and fiscally displaced kiwi of pearlish complexion, I hope these extra mc2s don't delay the tax cuts we hard-working wealth-creators so obviously deserve.

    Otherwise no one will be left in our third world bantustan except whining bludgers and slothful serving staff. Why, it's just impossible to get a decent oyster cocktail and a shoe-licking these days on my well-earned vacations home from Dubai.

    That Einstein fellow must be an addled socialist who can't tie his own laces. The only thing that counts is money, and I have lots of it so there.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie,

    Why, just the other day I was on the train platform, welcoming my daughter.

    WomenReallyGetOnMyTits (Dairy Flat)

    What a dipstick morobar. like to see you try that with a real man. When we meet face to face we see who likes relativity. Do'nt think your so smart mr pixie caramel. As Descartes said, le kiwiland, c'est un disgrace.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    To E Schrodinger: why don't you stop blaming other people for things that happen in your life and stop waiting for the govt to do things for you or give you handouts. Now that Klark is gone its' time for NZers to take PERSONAL RESPONSABILITY. Open the box yourself and see if your cat is alive or dead.

    That was Jah Rofflenui.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22848 posts Report Reply

  • stephen walker,

    Margaret Morrissey (Parents Outloud campaign group)
    We are giving children the message that when things get difficult you should just stay at home and have fun.

    Ed Balls (schools secretary)
    Claims that schools had been forced to close because of health and safety laws are nonsense. They were closed because teachers could not get into schools to open the schools and it was going to be really dangerous for some children trying to make the journeys when there weren't buses or tubes or trains available and it was very hard to drive.

    (excerpted from Their Views

    nagano • Since Nov 2006 • 645 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    FoolMeOnce (Otaki)

    The thought police are at it again. Did we learn nothing from "The Sky is Falling" doomsayers of the past?

    Mini ice ages, Y2K, Global warming/ckimate change & now E=mc^2? Well fool me once, shame on you, fool me 4 times shame on... just SHAME! Is all I'm saying.

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Testcard,

    freedom4justic (Waihopai)

    how do we kno that einstien is not part of the machine... e is 4 eiinstein... m is 4 machine... c is for cia...not sure what 2 is for...

    Since Nov 2007 • 23 posts Report Reply

  • dc_red,

    RichyRich (Epsom)

    Look as a Minister I can't recommend breaking a law, but I believe E should. It's just not possible for E to comply with M and C. Some people might frown at me saying this, but M and C have been running roughshod over E for too long.

    Less M and C. More Freedom. Praty Vote Act.

    Oil Patch, Alberta • Since Nov 2006 • 706 posts Report Reply

  • Don Christie,

    Earnest - Wellington

    Why do I always despair at the lack of scientific knowledge in our society. Science is not about proving black is white. Einstein's theory of relativity has been peer reviewed over the last few years by a vast body of his peers.

    When will we get our heads out of the sands and face the facts. Relativity is real, relativity is measurable and if we don't do something about it relativity will happen - all to soon.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1645 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    <heh> Pratty vote ACT </heh>

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    LeftieBaiter (Fielding)

    freedom4justic (Waihopai)

    how do we kno that einstien is not part of the machine... e is 4 eiinstein... m is 4 machine... c is for cia...not sure what 2 is for...

    Listen up commie spiv, 2 is for how many times we get medieval on your leftie ass when the revolution comes.

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Don Christie,

    NoFatChicks (Henderson)

    I actually saw that sign outside a bar of dubious repute in South Carolina. I think it may have had "or ugly" in there as well.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1645 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    I worked with a charming (not) fellow for some years, at his eventual leaving do, he was sporting a "No Fat Chicks" T shirt, his not skinny wife got less & less genial as the evening wore on...

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    his not skinny wife got less & less genial as the evening wore on...

    Yeah, fat chicks do that.
    ;-)
    Runs away and hides under the reply button.

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    (excerpted from Their Views

    Just last night, I read a Guardian piece about Carol Thatcher calling 'an unspecified tennis player' a golliwog. By the time I got to the comments thread, about one comment in three had been deleted by the moderator.

    The Guardian! Honestly, if we can't count on the last bastion of uptight leftism to be responsibly emotionally retarded, what's the world coming to?

    JesusIsLove (Merivale)

    Look, I don't even know why we're bothering to debate this. It's a theory of relativity. It's just a theory: somebody's 'best guess'. E might be mc^2, or it might be a banana, they just don't know. And yet we allow this 'theory' to be taught in schools as if it's fact, and we make an unquestionable religion out of science. This is hugely offensive to People of Faith.

    Those looking for real certainty should turn to the only real source of knowledge: the Bible. Only there can you find real certainty, real answers to what E really is. For does not Proverbs 3:5 state "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not to thine own understanding."

    It's too late to save Einstein's poor atheist soul from burning in the not-at-all-relative fires of Hell, but won't somebody THINK OF THE CHILDREN?

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    Phantom Expander (Blenheim)
    AHHHGGGG. I'm EXPANDING. Bloody speed of light.

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    OK folks, you've warmed up on some easy targets try and extract the urine from comments that parody themselves in one hermetically sealed package.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Justthefacts

    We're only being told half the story here. These "calculations" are merely speculation - done by Einstein using computer modelling and are now being used by the Look at the Swiss and French and Germans, suckered into spending billions into "Large Hadron" research.

    A Wild Goose chase, while the inconvenient truth is buried. See truefactsaboutrelativity.blogspot.co.za E=mc^2 is a localised phenomenom, most pronounced in the middle ages and does not affect New Zealand.

    And what has relativity ever done for us?

    WLG • Since Nov 2006 • 2264 posts Report Reply

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