Posts by Tom Beard

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  • Up Front: First Footing,

    Curses! Should have previewed: the first quoted part above should have been from Regan's

    I have a strict '2 pairs max' policy

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Up Front: First Footing,

    That's craaaaazy (and expensive?)

    Surely there are a few basics that any proper gentleman should have:

    - black dress shoes or boots
    - a second pair of black dress shoes (because you shouldn't wear the same pair two days in a row)
    - brown dress shoes (the old strictures against wearing brown are so old fashioned)
    - black semi-casual shoes in a more contemporary style (one doesn't want to look like a corporate drone when going to a gallery opening dressed in Zambesi)
    - black patent leather shoes or boots (nothing else will suffice with a dinner suit)
    - brown semi-casual shoes for weekends
    - something resembling plimsolls, if you insist
    - pale casual shoes or a sharp two-tone brogue to match a linen suit
    - sandals or slip-ons of various decriptions in case one finds oneself near a "beach"
    - sports shoes (if you must indulge in that sort of thing)
    - something with a bit more flair for those special occasions (Oxblood? Silver high-tops? Snakeskin boots?)

    50 pairs? That's craaaaazy (and expensive?)

    That would get expensive, especially since it's well nigh impossible to get decent mens' shoes for under $300. Stick to 10-20 pairs, as that will allow for all the basics above plus a few variations due to changing styles (round, chisel and pointed toes; laces, loafers and buckles; brogues, oxfords, wingtips and so forth), while still leaving plenty of credit for other essentials such as cravats and cufflinks.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Up Front: First Footing,

    I have the sort of broad feet that makes most shoes uncomfortably narrow, so of course I ... put up with the pain so that I can squeeze my feet into some slim and stylish Italian numbers, rather than be seen wearing something clumpy from the Last Footwear Company. I'm not going to go to the bother of being fitted for a bespoke linen suit just to ruin it with bad shoes.

    Clearly I'm not in touch with Mother Earth: I don't like walking barefoot on grass, and I even try to avoid walking on grass in shoes. Risk getting mud on my new Moma suede brogues? I don't think so! Luckily, there's not much grass around where I live.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Policeman at the Dinner Table,

    Pah! All of these arguments from wooly-headed nanny-statists are based on the unreasonable assumption that human beings are flawed, irrational, emotional creatures, when we all know that the human race consists entirely of perfectly self-interested Homo Economicus automata and Randian supermen.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Southerly: Life at Paremoremo Boys' High,

    Oh god, I thought that I'd managed to repress all those memories, and now they've all come flooding back. Replace "Paremoremo" with something beginning with C, and English with Maths, and you've just written 5 years of my biography. Only imagine all that combined with an English accent and starting third form in 1981 wearing a HART badge.

    I myself went to a namby-pamby liberal high school with vertical forms and peer support and no streaming or corporal punishment.

    Actually, it was streaming that eventually saved the school experience for me. It was a relief to be in a class where the teachers could actually get on with teaching, rather than trying to prevent the troglodytic scions of the squatocracy from throwing desks at the blackboard.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Up Front: What Sixteen Is,

    how would your story have finished in today's P fueled world?

    You know who else took P?

    by the time you're parenting teenagers you can no longer remember what it's like to be a teenager. Because otherwise it's just too bloody traumatic.

    Reminds me of an LCD Soundsystem song:

    Sound of silver talk to me
    Makes me want to feel like a teenager
    Until you remember the feelings of
    A real-life emotional teenager

    And then you think again.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Island Life: I can see clearly now,

    New York has a flag, a logo and a seal.

    Wellington has lots of seals!

    Could we change the Wellington one to incorporate the Ranfurly Shield in some way....

    And then change it back again when we lose it.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Island Life: I can see clearly now,

    Does New York have a logo?

    I believe Milton Glaser had a mildly successful stab at one.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Island Life: I can see clearly now,

    Roberts makes me cringe, too, but I also quite like the logo. It's certainly a lot livelier than ours.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

  • Hard News: Loving your dog and owning…,

    'factors other than how you can do the work - like keeping true opinions to yourself'.

    As B Jones point out, keeping true opinions to yourself is a factor in how you can do the work: it's called political neutrality, and there are plenty of other organisations with similar things in their code of conduct (which is why I no longer have a blog).

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report

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