Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: The Engagement

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  • Ethan Tucker,

    At least if William and Kate's first child is a girl that might spur the establishment to sort out the anachronistic rules of male primogeniture. Although perhaps largely irrelevant elitist traditions such as the monarchy are beyond adapting to contemporary cultural mores.

    Wellington • Since Apr 2008 • 119 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    This morning, as the happy couple were discussing starting a family on Nat Rad I inadvertently found myself picturing Prince William engaged in sexual congress. The mental image was so profoundly unerotic that I’m not sure I will feel any kind of urges ever again.

    Wilt indeed.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report Reply

  • Lucy Stewart, in reply to Sacha,

    We’re delighted for the young couple,’ said pub landlord Dave Stanley. ‘Obviously the next job now is to set about choosing a name for the child. I’d imagine ‘Kyle’ has got to be a front runner if it’s a boy, and ‘Cheryl’ if it turns out to be a young lady.

    If one checks out the line of succession, the first thirty people after William include a Xan, a Cosima, a Columbus, a Cassius, a Senna, and a Lyla (as well as plenty of more traditionally-named offspring.) The naming patterns of British nobility are branching out faster than you might think. And lest you assume that they were all born to people not in the direct line of succession, the first one will one day become Duke Xan of Gloucester.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Hosking,

    Why not Jason? Always liked the idea of a Prince Jason, or a King Jason. Its a name with an honourable heritage, going all the way back to the Argonauts.

    South Roseneath • Since Nov 2006 • 830 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia, in reply to Rob Hosking,

    If history had taken a slightly different path (and his two elder brothers fallen prey to Victorian infant mortality), we'd have ended up with a real live King Arthur.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Lucy Stewart, in reply to Craig Ranapia,

    If history had taken a slightly different path (and his two elder brothers fallen prey to Victorian infant mortality), we’d have ended up with a real live King Arthur.

    That was also famously and ineffectively tried back in the sixteenth century, as a symbol of Henry VII's reunion of the country after the Wars of the Roses (in a "to make you all forget I'm the mostly-Welsh descendant of a French princess, my son will be KING ARTHUR!" sort of way.) You've probably all forgotten Prince Arthur, who died young, but his widow - Katherine of Aragon - went on to have a much larger role in English history. Like giving her next husband a taste for getting rid of his wives.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Fleece, Navy Dad...

    Why not Jason? Always liked the idea of a Prince Jason, or a King Jason. Its a name with an honourable heritage, going all the way back to the Argonauts.

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7943 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    Aaargh - the heterosexual camp makes my eyes burn.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Meanwhile, The Guardian hold forth on that burning-like-a-dose-of-the-clap question: What will Kate Middleton wear on the big day?

    I’m seeing… underwear. With a crotch. Nice pair of Spanx.

    Though I've got to admit my inner fashionista is praying Middleton is putting in a call to Sarah Burton, who's just done her first solo collection as "creative director" of Alexander McQueen

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Leopold,

    Pre-coronation and privately, the royals can use any name they like - It is the regnal name which is important - Edward VII was pre-coronation Albert (despite Vicky, was considered too Kraut), Ed8 was pre-coronation David, and Charlie, if ever gets to be king, has chosen George VII for his name (Charles just far too Stuartish). Elizabeth was in fortunate position of having her real name the same as an acceptable regnal name.
    Willie will probably stick with William V as well.
    Henry, Arthur and Alfred are for some reason off-limits as regnal names (despite their illustrious ancestry)

    Since Jan 2007 • 153 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    picturing Prince
    William engaged in sexual congress

    I believe there's a body of slash around this. Given his schooling and alleged proclivities, it might be more factual than the usual Harry /Draco couplings.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 5550 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Ed8

    The hip-hop king.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    I believe there's a body of slash around this.

    I have a feeling that sentence could be used about pretty much anything ever, at this point.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Are you talking about Jim Mora?

    ’Cos I love him on Tux Wonder Dogs.

    Yes, I am! He is, IMO, just awful. Yesterday's Panel was a classic example. It was notable first for the rare occurence of Jim Mora offering an actual opinion about something. Naturally enough, it was in defence of the Royals. In response to Tim Watkin's and Gordon Campbell's laughing at the "Unemployed Girl To Marry Soldier From Welfare Family" headline, Mora was compelled to respond something along the lines of "Steady on. They're so much more than that".

    Quite apart from the point of the headline - not that that is all they are, but that that the statement is at least true - going right over his head, he seemed to remain, as usual, blissfully ignorant of the implications of his comment, namely that others in such a position are not "much more than that".

    Later, as Tim Watkin and Gordon Campbell both executed clinical takedowns of the politically loaded terms of reference and approach of the Welfare Working Group, Jim was further reduced to nonsensical Steady-on,-chaps-isms.

    It's not that he's right-wing, as such. Rather, he has a reptilian response of politeness to absolutely everything, whether deserving of it or not, because he's too spineless to actually stand up for anything. I presume he's against the actions of Hitler or Pol Pot but, if so, not because of any moral conviction, but rather that he is unlikely to find anyone challenging his position.

    Gordon Cambell described the WWG's wilful ignoring of all of the social and political changes that have led to the current situation as "a trainwreck" and, a fraction reluctantly, as "a crime". When Tim Watkin noted that, in the old days, government departments soaked up the otherwise unemployable and mused whether the end of such things might have something to do with today's beneficiary numbers, Jim's pointless response was that some people were against it. More than once, GC and TW audibly groaned at his stupid questions an were forced to reply that "yes, that's the point , Jim".

    By the time the panel had moved on to addressing the Castor Bay party thing, Tim Watkin - bless him - seemed to have had enough of Mora's thudding thoughtlessness, and when JM pulled his usual "[insert personal prejudice] worries us [NZers]" trick ("out-of control youth", in this case), TW objected. "It doesn't worry me; it worries you ", he groaned. JM seemed rather hurt at having his autopilot prejudice challenged for once.

    In short, it's quite clear that Gentleman Jim considers any political analysis gauche. Personally, I find that kind of kneejerk conservatism more repellent than the likes of National Party Ministers who are at least partially aware of what they're thinking.

    Harumph!

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    At least if William and Kate's first child is a girl that might spur the establishment to sort out the anachronistic rules of male primogeniture.

    Actually I think those rules are rather well established. It's getting rid of them so that a female can be the big cheese that you probably want.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Although perhaps largely irrelevant elitist traditions such as the monarchy are beyond adapting to contemporary cultural mores.

    Really? The British monarchy is more adaptable than you might think.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • st ephen, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    Nonsense! The Mayans have clearly indicated that this will occur when the ball playing Hero Twins bring down 7-Macaw

    Does Graham Henry know about this? NZ plays Tonga first up in RWC2011, but the Tongan ball-playing twins Anthony and Saia Faingaa are in the Australian squad. 7-Macaw could meet them in the semi-final if France beats NZ in pool play. More likely is a meeting with the Argentine twins Manuel and Felipe Contepomi in the quarter-final. But NZ also plays Canada in pool play, with twins Dan and Mike Pletch. And you can't rule out de Villiers picking Akona and Odwa Ndungane for the semi-final.

    Someone needs to tell 7-Macaw to avoid the dentist.

    dunedin • Since Jul 2008 • 254 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    ’Cos I love him on Tux Wonder Dogs.

    That's quite possibly the least ambiguous insult I've ever come across.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Petra, in reply to 3410,

    lol, I see you really don't like him. And fair enough, I guess - he shouldn't be put in punditry placement, as he's not a political animal. I've never heard him in such discussions, and he doesn't strike me as anyone who would be a useful analyst of current affairs, or an effective foil in robust debate. But I don't hate him for that.

    I've only heard him on the car radio in the afternoons, where I quite enjoy his gentle manner as he chats with all variety of local people; and his kindly, sometimes funny, commentary on Tux Wonder Dogs. He's an old softie, and there's a place in the world for old softies, I reckon. ..it's just that that place should be on Tux Wonder Dogs and inoffensive afternoon radio - not debate panels.

    Anyway, now that I've made you sick with all the sugar, please continue! :-D


    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1330671/Court-gossip-History-making-up.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

    Within two hours of the announcement of the royal engagement, so many royal experts had gathered outside Buckingham Palace that a quick-response team of 250 specially trained police was called in to keep them under control.

    ‘Without a word of warning, there was so much gibberish and poppycock being tossed about that someone might easily have been killed,’ said a police spokesman.

    One of the ring- leaders was screaming: ‘A close friend of Kate’s who asked not to be named told me last night that her favourite colour is ...’ before being bundled into a police van.

    Tabloid heaven. 8-]

    Rotorua • Since Mar 2007 • 317 posts Report Reply

  • Petra, in reply to giovanni tiso,

    lol, no really! I think Tux Wonder Dogs is one the best shows on the telly. Srsly. And I'm not even weird, or anything!

    Rotorua • Since Mar 2007 • 317 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    lol, no really! I think Tux Wonder Dogs is one the best shows on the telly. Srsly.

    I know that feeling.

    Even my close friends and family think I’m joking when I tell them I like Home and Away.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    I've got nothing against Tux Wonder Dogs per se. But if you're talking about Jim Mora as a journalist and host of a prominent show of cultural and political commentary, and you praise him for his work on a show about dogs, well...

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • sally jones,

    I’m seeing… underwear. With a crotch. Nice pair of Spanx

    And a mankini for Will - in royal purple of course

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 179 posts Report Reply

  • Petra, in reply to 3410,

    You and my daughter! She'll watch hours of H&A on YouTube, which makes me worry that there's some subliminally hidden zombie making thing going on. H&A is teh evol.

    As for Wills and Kate, the psychics are enjoying themselves. http://nz.news.yahoo.com/a/-/world/8340074/fortune-tellers-warn-will-and-kate/

    Rotorua • Since Mar 2007 • 317 posts Report Reply

  • Petra, in reply to giovanni tiso,

    lol, I see your point.

    I think I may have heard some of The Panel - it's on RNZ in the afternoon, right? I always thought it was just a friendly chat show with an over-the-teacups feel, rather than any serious discussion about things political or cultural. Though I may be thinking of the wrong show... apologies if I am, the only working radio I have is in the car.

    Anyway, poor ol' Jim. I'll defend his kindly cuddliness against the h8ers. :p

    Rotorua • Since Mar 2007 • 317 posts Report Reply

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