Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: Fake Fiona Rae

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  • Peter Cresswell,

    "Boring"? After that freaky 'Heartbreak Hotel' opening, the first half was a little flat (true), but the second half was fantastic, and that band was as tight as a fish's arse.

    Maybe you had to be up front. :-)

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 27 posts Report Reply

  • Alas Dair,

    Similarly .... I reckon I've seen these up on UKNOVA. Also fast, also requiring signup though.
    Good Luck!

    Wellington • Since Nov 2007 • 1 posts Report Reply

  • Heather Gaye,

    The last time was when I returned a found wallet with $120 in it. Despite being the only person waiting at the Community Constable's office, it was 20 minutes before the guy got off the phone, and then he gave me all kinds of grief...

    If there's a bank card inside, take it into the local branch. I did that once & the teller was practically kissing my feet with delight. They'll contact the owner in quick-smart time too, rather than just hiffing it into lost&found.

    Morningside • Since Nov 2006 • 533 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    3140: silly you, if it goes unclaimed you get the money - as long as you left your details.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    3140: silly you, if it goes unclaimed you get the money - as long as you left your details.

    Yeah, probably, but it wasn't mine, so I didn't want it.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Similarly .... I reckon I've seen these up on UKNOVA. Also fast, also requiring signup though.

    But much easier to get an account on than UKNova, where being there at the right time to grab a recycled account is pretty difficult.

    Just signed up and tried a couple of torrents from The Box: one very good, the other broken.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22830 posts Report Reply

  • stephen walker,

    but it wasn't mine, so I didn't want it.

    one of the most important things you can teach your kids:

    if it's not yours, don't take it.

    nagano • Since Nov 2006 • 645 posts Report Reply

  • samuel walker,

    Just signed up and tried a couple of torrents from The Box: one very good, the other broken.

    its up there as one of the best torrent trackers out there at the moment.

    focused enough to be legible (you don't have to sift through holywood blockbusters and pre-releases to get to the good stuff). and is dedicated to UK tv, which is of course, in the main, 42 million times better than American tv.

    and broken torrents seem to be few and far between.

    Since Nov 2006 • 203 posts Report Reply

  • Fenderboy,

    For those of you interested in the John Cale show at The Bruce Mason Theatre I have now posted the link to download it.Enjoy

    www.kiwiconcerts.blogspot.com

    Sin City - Auckland • Since Nov 2007 • 1 posts Report Reply

  • JP Hansen,

    I caught this excellent skit last week. Given the Xtra issues lately makes it all the more funny.

    24: The Unaired 1994 Pilot
    (Jack Bauer saves the world with AOL 3.0.)

    Waitakere • Since Nov 2006 • 206 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    My little last minute suggestion re the cop-out cops. This is a true story and it could help you a lot.

    One time I reported a very minor theft. A little punk bought my motorbike, and didn't bring any safety gear at all. He was seriously going to ride it to Howick from West Aucklan during peak hour, in a t-shirt, shorts and jandals. So, being a big-hearted fellow, I offered to lend him my very expensive bike jacket and gloves.

    A few weeks later I had not heard back from him, and he had also not transferred ownership of the vehicle. No attempts to contact him got me any answers. So I reported the theft to my local community constable. They suggested there was little chance I would every see any action at all on this.

    I went back a week later to follow up my report and the copper there was very understanding and said that it sounded like a cheeky little thief. He then complained to me that the police were so busy that they didn't even have time to fix his printer, which he'd been waiting about 6 months for, and had to go through to a different room every time he did a printout, which was hundreds of times a day.

    I was very understanding back and told him that I could fix his printer in about 2 minutes. Which he accepted immediately. I then fixed the printer and he was stoked.

    About 2 hours later the guy who nicked my jacket turned up, apologizing profusely, and told me there had been no need to call the cops, he was just busy himself.

    A day later the copper flagged me down walking past and asked if my jacket had been returned. He seemed very happy that it had been and said it was amazing what the cops could do with cellphone records. I inquired about the printer and he said it was 'just beautiful'. Everyone wins.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Everyone wins.

    Except those unable or unwilling to bribe the Police, in similar circumstances. :(

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • InternationalObserver,

    :(

    Yeah, I'm with 3410 on this. Whilst I'm happy for you, what about the rest of us? What if my local copshop has fully operational printers? Should I offer to wash his patrol car? His private car? Take out his ugly sister?

    Your anecdote really only tells us that the cops could catch the crims if they could be arsed, but they can't.

    Since Jun 2007 • 909 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    You can take what you like out of the story. I did not bribe anyone - I would have fixed the printer regardless - it was merely a matter of installing it, and I saw a guy suffering needlessly the annoyance of bureaucracy getting in the way of his work. You might have noticed from the loss of the jacket that I'm a helpful kind of person.

    But yes, it does show that police can sometimes solve petty crimes very easily. He told me it was about 10 mins work, in the end. But I really don't think he thought he owed it to me. It was more a matter of professional pride. I think he felt a bit stink about how ludicrously easy it was for me to solve his extremely annoying problem, and he wanted to show me that he could solve problems in his own area that baffled me.

    This isn't one of those 'In order to bribe the police, do X' stories. It's a karma and human nature story. If you walk into a cop shop with the attitude of 'friggin lazy cops should help me out, I pay my taxes, isn't that what they're for?', then you will probably get similar attitude back. Instead it was 'I feel stink to have to report that I was a bit careless in my trust of a stranger, but that doesn't mean it was OK to steal my stuff, does it?'. And the resolution was perfect. The kid got a scare but no charges. He returned the stuff personally and gave me an apology.

    So my suggestion is: Report it. The very fact you approached the cops puts the ball squarely in Mr-Dangerous-Driving-Bentley-or-Rolls-Owner who-takes-off-from-the-scene-of-an-accident's court. I bet there are very few such vehicles too. It is also possible that you may end up being the one in trouble if you don't report it, and it won't be a small bill. There are probably even fewer such cars driving around with panel damage the color of your car.

    To me, that one is very much a matter of principle. It's a serious crime which could have ended your life. It may be very easy to solve for the cops, you just don't know until you try. And if, just if, the cops tell you they've got a problem too, don't just go "I don't give a shit". Don't prejudge them, or you certainly will get the justice you deserve, which is none.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Actually, that's harsh. You don't deserve no justice. It would be nice if the crime solved itself.

    But consider that Jeremy and I are the only ones suggesting a course of action that has any likelihood of justice. Others are maybe helping you to feel better by living out the self-fulfilling prophecy of getting bitter on the police before you've even tried them. And my particular story is suggesting that some petty crimes can get solved. You can decide if it's a bribe, and if it is, if you care, and would rather just have a smashed up car, some rich guy getting away with a hit and run, and you paying an excess and getting your premiums raised (as well as having to clean out what would have been in my trousers that night!).

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • InternationalObserver,

    I'm down with the karma thing too Ben but have a closer look at what you've written. The cop wasn't interested in helping you (which is his job, no?) until he felt stink because you'd done something nice for him. And he then admits it only took about 10 minutes work to resolve this 'problem'?? I say again:

    Your anecdote really only tells us that the cops could catch the crims if they could be arsed, but they can't.

    But even I'll concede it's a sweeping judgement based on only one anecdote. But perhaps it's the way of the world. My friend in London was complaining that now she not only has to pay €80 for a haircut, she also has to tip the hairdresser €20 or she gets a bad cut!!

    I had to laugh because when I suggested she get a new hairdresser she was mortified: "Oh no, I can't do that - she's really brilliant when I tip her". Evidently all the hairdressers expect tips now. I wonder how long before we'll be expected to tip the McWageslave in the drive thru??

    Since Jun 2007 • 909 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    The cop wasn't interested in helping you (which is his job, no?) until he felt stink because you'd done something nice for him.

    Sure. That's why my advice stands. Be nice to the cops, it helps them to see your problem in perspective. 10 mins work to stop a small crime happening was about fair.

    You never actually know what the cops are capable of until you give them a chance. This car crash could be a 5 minute job, looking up all the Bentleys and Rolls in the area, finding the gold one, and giving them a phone call. That's actually a lot less time than would be wasted if the cops had to come to the scene of the crime, take an accident report etc. Usually when the cops call people about a crime they were involved in, they fall over themselves trying to make amends. A hit and run is a serious crime, so just forking out for the busted up car and giving an apology is getting off lightly.

    We could sit around all day complaining about the cops. Or we can take advice about how to get them to work for us. Your choice.

    I think a lot of the reason they are unhelpful is because people are not nice to them. Sure that's not the ideal system, but they are human, and a lot of people tend to forget that. Think about how you feel about difficult or even abusive customers.

    Hey, you can take my story about how I got the cops to work for me how you like. Feel bitter on them and never use their services, or lighten up, help them out, and get sorted.

    If there is any deeper point to my story it is that bitterness doesn't pay.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • merc,

    Bitterness is a blog steroid.

    Since Dec 2006 • 2471 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Yup, misery loves company. In fact, it seems to be the main way kiwis relate to each other, and when anyone tells them an actually happy true story, like my one, people take it as an affront.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10650 posts Report Reply

  • merc,

    Whaddya mean maate, grumpy today eh, cheer up, could be worse.
    Gawd I just wrote a Mutton Birds dirge.

    Since Dec 2006 • 2471 posts Report Reply

  • InternationalObserver,

    you can take my story about how I got the cops to work for me how you like. Feel bitter on them and never use their services, or lighten up, help them out, and get sorted.

    Aaaargghhh!

    I'm going to finish now Ben, cos we're obviously on opposite sides of the same planet. But ...

    You seem to think that we the public need to do more for the Police than just report a crime, and give them the make and rego of the car that hit us. Look, I can agree that maybe we could also go to the Postshop, pay $2.50 and get the owners name (from the plate number) and then pass that detail on to the Police as well (although don't they have their own computers that can do that?) but I draw the line at asking the Cop how his day is, would he like a hug, can I get him a cup of tea, maybe a muffin?

    When I report a crime I'm polite and courteous - I don't bang my fist on the counter and demand a Squad Car get round to the perps house RIGHT NOW!! But I do expect them to do their job and follow thru on my complaint, not bin it into the 'Farkov File'.

    We could sit around all day complaining about the cops. Or we can take advice about how to get them to work for us. Your choice.

    So you're saying we should tip the hairdresser, right? I thought that's what we were paying our taxes for, but clearly the Police Service is going the way of the Health Service. Next time I'm sideswiped I'll call the Headhunters.

    Since Jun 2007 • 909 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Ben, I know you didn't bribe the cop, but he said he couldn't do anything about it, you did something for him, and suddenly he can do something about it. What else would you call it?*

    *Genuine question.

    It is also possible that you may end up being the one in trouble if you don't report it

    Good point. I'll do so today.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • robbery,

    Your anecdote really only tells us that the cops could catch the crims if they could be arsed, but they can't.

    I think it does illustrate a problem in the police force and personal experience has bought out the same example, although I never fixed anyones printer so my case remained unattended to.
    I got the same fob off attitude and the same "we're so hard done by we're not going to put any effort into our job till we get recognition for our over worked under paid status".
    Its a mind set and a bad one to get into.
    if you're around co workers that are continually complaining about their job and thus undermining the nature of what you're doing then thats contagious, and it makes for the situation we see in the police force today, that being one of fuck all results and this negative unhelpful vibe you get if you ever need them.

    It doesn't need to be like that, and it will take a serious shake up at managerial level to fix that.

    I note that national libraries have dealt with their issues of "begrudging public servants" and I've had amazingly helpful results whenever I'm in a library looking for something difficult.

    I take it this has come from an initiative at the top which requires employees to be helpful and cooperative to the client ie the person in the library reading books.

    They're there to help as are police, and the sooner they get their minds around that and off the mindset their in the better it will be for people in the community.
    Its a win win cos they'll start enjoying their job more and they'll get the respect they so desperately want from the community which they're not getting while their being pricks.

    I've been in a few other countries where the cops are really helpful (not america) and its a welcome change, not that they're their to give directions to lost tourists but it sure helps to make them be seen as part of a health community and not only there in times of trouble.

    new zealand • Since May 2007 • 1882 posts Report Reply

  • merc,

    Great post, robbery. Maybe they need to look at recruitment level, modernize their advertising, induction, training and retention, hell even have an HR Dept (AFAIK, they haven't).
    And deal swiftly with the blood sucking top level person who is being a well-poisoner.

    Since Dec 2006 • 2471 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    Great post, robbery. Maybe they need to look at recruitment level, modernize their advertising, induction, training and retention, hell even have an HR Dept (AFAIK, they haven't).

    They have a HR Dept (link. Recruitment is handled in the regions by recruitment officers, training is done nationally at Porirua. Training standards I think are considered to be fairly high, and cover a better range of things than some international forces cover (some police forces have much shorter training periods, and spend more time on shooting stuff, and less time on "not being an asshole" and "knowing a little bit about the law"), but it's only a 5 month course. It takes longer to train to become a hairdresser, as a comparison (not wanting to pick on hairdressers, it's just always struck me as strange that it's that way around).

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

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