Posts by Hebe
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Speaker: Naked Inside the Off-Ramp, in reply to
The key differences between most corporates and a democracy are in the treatment of minorities and the engagement with minority opinions. Key’s behaviour during public hearings on the bill made it plain that in his view alternative opinions were a waste of his time.
Key seems to have tipped into the Rob Muldoon "you can think what you like but if you disagree with me you are a fool" political mode.
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Such pinkness! The title shot's blossom carpet is good.
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Capture: Two Tales of a City, in reply to
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to
Nuclear families sometimes seems accurate.
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to
Just keep in mind that this isn’t a thought experiment or intellectual game for a far few of us.
+1 As I head off to an unavoidable bout of bastarding today, I’m cheered to read that Craig.
Marcus has no fucking idea of what it is like to have a person in your life who coldly scans the prey like a crocodile when they enter the room, seeking the first sign of kindness or humanity (= weakness in their eyes), so they know where to attack. My defence is withdrawal before it gets to me and self-protective deflective bastardry. I go into this situation with my eyes open because there is someone else involved who needs help and protection due to dementia.Without getting too therapy-like, there is world of difference between being able to sack a friend or running into munters at work and dealing with an asshole who has no wish to change year-in-year-out for decades. As I have made the choice to stay in that ring, it is a matter of modifying my reactions to that person and strategically pushing, as my beloved calls it, the selfish cunt button or else like you say --
the thing about hitting the Necessary Bastard setting, is that it’s exhausting and very often a pretty unpleasant headspace to be in
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to
I have a family full of missing stairs. Seriously. Every second one.
That happens. I’m fortunate my close family is not like that, but there is an over-representation of missing stairs of many hues in the wider family network. Those people are painful and destructive, and unable to be avoided. I am careful about limiting my exposure to them, epecially one on one: otherwise I get toxic.
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Up Front: The Missing Stair and the…, in reply to
At what proportions can you free yourself from onerous family gatherings by saying “you know – I think everybody there would have a much better time if I didn’t go”?
When a) You do not want to spend the gathering fiddling with food, doing the dishes and sorting the recycling while patching up children's knees
b) you make an appointment for the shrink they day after the gathering at the time you accept the invite
c) you have the irresistable urge to pinprick the accepted fictions that enable appalling behaviour to be acceptable.
One of my old friends has a one-hour rule for his wife's rellies: he goes to everything then leaves after an hour, no exceptions. He says that after 30 or so years they all accept that's what he does and attrbute it to his foibles rather than theirs -it suits everyone. -
Dealing on a daily basis at present with a missing flight of stairs in the wider family, this piece is a much-needed hoot Emma. It might save me from disgracing myself in public. On the other hand, it might open the floodgates to a "I don't give a flying fuck that you are [in this situation] you are an evil fucker'' moment.