Posts by Emma Hart

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  • Up Front: A Word About Safety, in reply to TracyMac,

    On another note, would you consider using the terms top/bottom as more generic terms for the parties in a kink scenario? All doms are tops, but not all tops are doms (ahem).

    So terminology is always problematic, but there are really two main reasons I've made the choices I have. One, I know just as many people who are uncomfortable with being called Tops or bottoms as Doms or subs, and two, I think the latter terminology is more familiar to vanilla people, which is the audience I'm writing for.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: A Word About Safety,

    I am intrigued (to the point where I am currently wading through someone's PhD comparing rape trials in Britain and the Netherlands) by the idea of switching from adversarial to inquisitorial trials.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: A Word About Safety, in reply to Dylan Reeve,

    The jury instructions at the end of this were that it was not rape if an ordinary person in the same situation would reasonably believe they had consent.

    Everything else aside, I am so bummed that the question still apparently being asked is "Did she refuse consent?" not "Did he get consent?" But then I also thought "my partner is vomiting" was an obvious sign that something was very wrong, so...

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Real Victims, Here, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    What must their parents feel like when they discover that they've raised such an evil person?

    I've seen a couple of dads on Twitter really worried about how to stop their kids getting sucked into this headspace. I've seen people talk about monitoring their teenagers' internet usage, and fuck knows I don't know more than anyone else, but I think this is too late.

    Drench your sons from the earliest age in stories where female characters aren't in relationships, aren't pursuing relationships, are just Doing Stuff like people. Model treating women with respect, asking their opinions, listening when they speak. Share the care-giving. Say things to your sons like "Well okay, but Mum can't do that for you right now because she has to work/go drink wine in the bath."

    What must their parents feel like when they discover that they've raised such an evil person?

    This occurred to me just after I hit 'post' on that comment.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Real Victims, Here,

    Attachment

    Also. This came up on my Twitter feed this morning but didn't really fit into the post. How did these guys get this way? I guess we'll never know. (Image from the Daily Mail.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Real Victims, Here, in reply to Moz,

    I'm not a huge fan of watchlists and stuff as a rule, but when someone chooses to label themselves as needing that sort of attention, bring it on.

    These guys. Kicked off reddit - reddit - for being too awful. But given they advocate, and sometimes carry out - extreme violence, if half the members of their forums are law enforcement personnel... I'm kind of okay with that.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Why a Woman is Like a Bicycle,

    I have also been told off for "speaking for all women". By men.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Why a Woman is Like a Bicycle, in reply to Moz,

    Has anyone objected on the grounds that it's appropriation? You just can't know what it's like to be a woman merely by riding a bike...

    Oh dear gods yes.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Why a Woman is Like a Bicycle, in reply to JessicaRose,

    I’d tweet it but you might not get it in all the viral popularity.

    Thanks, Jessica. The thing that gets me the most about the response (because once the abuse gets to a certain level I just can't take it seriously any more) is that there IS lovely stuff in there, and I'm not getting to see it.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Why a Woman is Like a Bicycle,

    Attachment

    I've been told some people aren't seeing the tweet embedded in this column, and I'm having a bit of trouble with the back end right now for some reason, so in the meantime I'll pop the image here.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

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