Posts by Mark Graham
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Merry Xmas to all. Good show and great debates. I just wish I had more time to participate more.
Russell, you really do provide a throughtful commentary on things and this country would be worse off without you and your colleagues.
Good wishes to Fiona as well. She's a treasure.
MG
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Wow - I had no idea Juha was this famous and a superhero for the rest of us interweb mortals.
I salute you! (nice meeting you the other day, too)
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But where are the answers???
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Best coffee ever - Ecuador - coffee syrup topped up with hot milk. French coffee - average. Italian coffee - ok. New Zealand coffee - amongst the best.
Ducks: yep. Time to let them in to the country. French ones, that is. Even at risk of avian influenza. And un-pastuerised cheese. For God's sake, we're adults. Let us take the risk ourselves.
And let markets open up in our towns. A food market came twice a week into the parking square below our hotel in St Germain. Superb. They may have buggered us in the WC but they do food rather well.
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...insouciance...
...no less!
You've been in the South of France for too long, mon ami.
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But thanks for the advice, Mark and Jeremy, I know it was very kindly meant...
Yes, indeedy. And, as Emma rightfully corrected me, one size does not fit all.
My daughter (9 months with the curl in the middle of her forrid...) tends to cry in a particularly demanding and piercing tone. We're still training her (and ourselves). Every kid is different, and I suspect we approach each one differently as well.
I sympathise with Bob's reflux. Never nice being introduced to the world when it's filled with pain and I will remain ever grateful that was one problem we didn't have to deal with. Good luck.
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It's always gratifying to be agreed with. Thanks Jeremy!
If you don't tell them where the lines of acceptable behaviour are, its your fault if they grow up not knowing them.
Mmmm - is that a recipe for the repair of the breakdown of society? ;)
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Putting the baby in another room doesn't seem to be an option for us. If he doesn't get picked up within about five milliseconds, he screams himself to the point of hysteria -- and then it takes ages to calm him down enough to feed. Jennifer suspects that he lives in fear of us abandoning him (with good reason probably, given his behaviour -- the poor chap).
Answers:
1. the toughest thing in the first few weeks of parenting wasn't any of the above - it was putting her down in her own bed when all I wanted to do was cuddle and smooch her!2. So we had this thing we called the magic sleep book. We loved it, because it explained baby routines, how parents automatically stuff them up, how we reward undesirable behaviour and reinforce it, how to encourage good sleeping routines. It was brilliant.
But the best thing about it, was that when we lent it to other people, their babies slept through the night. Immediately. Before they even read a page.
3. I'll ditto what Malcolm said about the sleep book. Compulsory reading, I wish I know now about getting babies to sleep by themselves when I went through child number 1.
4. She told us to just put him down, and let him scream. And he did, for an hour, while I lay in our bed and cried. Then he fell asleep, slept for five hours straight, and we never had to deal with it again.
There you go - others have said it better than I ever could.
Check nappy; check the cry (are they in pain (pretty unlikely, really) or just WANT TO BE PICKED UP. NOW. Remember routine, routine, routine. Be strong. Keep thinking three days. Apply to all future attempts at emotional manipulation (it's not exactly a constant war zone out there). You'll all end up happier.
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Sympathies. As one who has a not quite 3 year old who was generally bliss, and a 9 month old who is more reminiscent of the little girl with the "...curl in the middle of her forehead...", may I offer some advice (a not necessarily wise thing to do as I notice no other parent has braved the attempt - remember, never tell other parents what to do with their kids - but then I'm hopeless at taking my own advice).
1. Six weeks - the first is hideous. Then it should get better. The goos start, they focus and smile and everything changes.
2. Bypanthan and Daktozin. The first whenever bum crack rash appears and the second when it gets really bad. Do not use sparingly. Forget all the mung bean papaya cream cures. Use modern medicine. It works.
3. Put the baby in the baby's room (I know some will shudder at this). They snort, fart, stop breathing, wake up whenever you wake up and generally make sleeping impossible. Put them in their own room and you'll both sleep better.
4. Ear plugs. There ain't much you can do and unfortunately, short of rubbing Jennifer's feet and making her a cup of tea, you're surplus to requirements. For a first time mum, this requires a level of maturity approaching sainthood, but it's worth a try. Offer to do more washing and cook every meal and clean the toilet. Demand Jennifer has a snooze in the afternoon while LR sleeps - even if she doesn't you win brownie points for being a caring kind of guy.
5. What's your antenatal class members up to. Commiserate and seek support.
Good luck, it does get better.
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...we'd like to suggest to those insanely angry New Zealanders out there that they man up to this loss a little more...
You know, apart from a few rather pathetic letters to the editor, I haven't come across any major emotional headcases out there and I'm currently travelling in the deep South - a region you'd think would be amongst the most vociferous.
It seems to be the MSM who keep bleating on about it all and the meltdowns happening around us...er, where exactly?