Posts by Michael Savidge

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  • Up Front: First Footing,

    Does anyone have, or know anyone who has, tattoos on their feet?

    I've always had a hankering...

    I tried once in Lombok but they told me only girls did that.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Up Front: First Footing,

    Ah Emma, what a nostalgic nerve you've hit.

    Such freedom brings risk of course.

    I used to work for DOC and once had the pleasure of doing some hut maintenance at Masons Bay on Stewart Island. After hours we used to build a driftwood bonfire and frolic on the beach till dark. Unfortunately one evening the frolicking turned feral when I stepped on a buried boning knife and sliced a good inch and a half into my very sole. I didn't notice until the next step when it opened up and swallowed a mountain of sand. Cue minor panic (we were two days walk from any medical assistance) and a quick application of water and bandage on the outside, and whisky and panadol on the inside. Colleague raced off to get within radio distance of help.

    Next afternoon a plane landed on the beach to whisk me off to the good doctors at Halfmoon Bay who proceeded to insert dozens and dozens of internal stitches and 10 big fat ones to close the impressive gash.

    Even got my name in the paper.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Up Front: First Footing,

    Even better than mere barefoot driving is piloting a left-hand drive auto with your left foot dangling out the window!!

    Of course a certain amount of flexibility is required.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Up Front: First Footing,

    I've always had the softest spot for me old bare feets. Y'know, they keep me grounded and connect me with 'ol Mother earth and all that hippy shit.

    And once I even managed to raise eyebrows in that other haven of the bare sole, Hawaii, by doing an eighteen mile hike sans bulky boots as all the tourists and a few locals trudged by in their leather and goretex creations. Tootsies were a wee bit tender by the end (I guess I forgot about the volcanic origins of the place) but I really wanted to feel the red soil and frangipani flowers underfoot for hours on end. I also had the pleasure of wading through every stream I encountered without worrying about getting any stupid socks wet.

    And my feet smelled like frangipangi for hours afterwards!

    I really enjoy driving barefoot too.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Debate and Onwards,

    Which is precisely what I was trying to explain to Peter.

    What part of "cut off state-funding to no-hoping breeders and this will stop" did you fail to grasp Russell?

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Cracker: Heroes and Villains,

    Geez Shep,

    Sounds like you've been through their customer service training regime!

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Policeman at the Dinner Table,

    No, no gravy here either. No kids, prefer beer. I did ask one other question you've neglected to address though...

    Peter, I respect your preferences in regard to phasing out the DPB, I'm sure many would agree. Unfortunately, I don't really see it lowering incidences of violent crime; in fact it might, y'know, make shit worse.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Southerly: Life at Paremoremo Boys' High,

    I too spent my informative years in a testosterone-fuelled sadist academy well-known for its rugby and rowing culture. Hint: it ends in lake.

    I was a smartarse and got thrashed for it on a few occasions and mostly without much complaint. However one day I was caught smoking and fraternising with some girls from our sister school during lunch and was marched off for some re-education of the cane kind. In a moment of sheer brilliance, I refused.

    Cue much huffing and threatening and general hilarity. My Mum was phoned and she proceeded to tell said cane-toad that if he laid one finger on me she'd have his balls etc etc. I could hear her not quite yelling at him that I had permission to smoke at home and even bring girls around if I was lucky enough to find one naive enough. He couldn't help himself and started chuckling and after hanging up told me to piss off and try not to get caught again.

    Having said that, my teachers were generally supportive and only a couple could be seen in retrospect as psychotic.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Policeman at the Dinner Table,

    ...imaginarary

    I like it. Unintentionally more insulting than you intended!

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Policeman at the Dinner Table,

    Actually, I'm not sure if Key's Mum was a DPB recipient. But she had state help nonetheless.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 324 posts Report

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