Stories: Love
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3410,
Not the roomiest trousers ever.
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I hope Isabel won't mind us sharing this. Great to find a Bowie song I had never heard before.
Incidentally, DB was born one day before me. With the time zones, it could have been pretty much at the same time I emerged.
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Simon Aww so sweet and yet so dodgy -thanks for putting a smile on my face.
Emma I remember him being mightily impressed when he discovered I knew all the words.
At 7.00 this morning I put the two little people I love best in all the world on a train, accompanied by their grandmother, to spend two nights in Nelson before we join them for the family Christmas. First time the little one's been away overnight but I'm sure he'll be fine. Seeing the love between my parents and my children brings me immense joy.
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Oh but there's more:
[RB: we're showing some angsty teen love for Bowie, so I trust the threadjack is ok]
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Ok, one more:
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Intermission...
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I should be so lucky
Lucky lucky lucky
I should be so lucky in loveKylie knew how much unrequited love sucked. Just once I'd like it to go both ways because I hear that proper love thing is quite good.
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Really, what was with rockstars in those days thinking they could sing in other languages?
Oh, god, this is one of my minor obsessions. I have Toni Basil's 'Mickey' in Spanish, and Gene Pitney's 'A Town Without Pity' in Italian, and some ABBA in various tongues. I'm not sure why, but I totally dig that stuff.
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Looking at the little, scrunched-up face in the car-seat as I carried it up the steps to our house after his release from SCBU, this huge, overwhelming feeling welling up inside me, as I finally comprehended that I was responsible for the care and well-being of this bundle of cells, that was simultaneously both part of me, and most definitely not part of me.
12 years on, and that feeling has not abated ...
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3410,
I'm not sure why, but I totally dig that stuff.
(Sorry, Gio.)
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Oh Brent are you in for a let down - any day now they're going to push you away, you want to hug them and they're too big for that - it's the start of them becoming adults and it breaks your heart partly because it all happens so suddenly, leaving you wistfully looking at parents walking hand in hand with their little kids (I found myself doing that today).
At this point I get to announce that my son has just finished high school and my daughter got her drivers license this week - we're no longer needed at all ....
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Paul Campbell - and Brent Jackson - oh my goodness, you are so definitely needed mostest!
It wont have the same immediacy- it's not often the direct helping,
but the sheer *being there* -with experience, with ability to suggest
alternatives, with wry 'been there, done that - and here's a possibly better way-it's why parents dont dissolve after their offspring hit reproductive age.
It's why we have (and, in many cultures, revere) grandparents - and other older members of a whanau.Your parental jobs are - continuing. Life-long*
(*ask my Mum. She's nearly 83, and still doing it-)
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Blondie did a couple of songs in French as well: 'Sunday Girl',
definitely, and I think 'Denis'.(Debbie Harry was French Singing in the USA [snort!] )
My daughter loves Sandy Shaw's 'Wight is Wight' but the only version available in digital format is in French.
It is actually better in French. The original words are kind of naff.
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It wont have the same immediacy- it's not often the direct helping, but the sheer *being there*
Yes, this.
I want to write something about my mother, in this context, but I'm not sure how to say it yet.
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Islander: I know - but I still have twinges for that unconditional love that is no more, and went away so suddenly
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When doing historical research you are sometimes lucky enough to discover a gem. A few years ago I was researching the life of Janet Fraser, wife of Prime Minister Peter. Janet and Peter had one of those devoted and successful political and personal partnerships, having had to wait for Janet's divorce from her first husband before they could marry in 1918.
Janet's granddaughter, actress Alice Fraser, showed me a letter Peter had written to her father Harold (Peter's stepson), on Janet's death in 1945.
Dear Harold, This note is a very sad one. In fact the saddest I have ever written. Words are not adequate to express my sorrow or to indicate what the departure of your mother means to me. She passed away peacefully ... Her passing was just like the running down of a clock, gently to the end. About an hour and a half before she died, she said "Goodbye: Goodbye everybody", and her last words were to me, uttered when she was very weak, "Darling, I am all right..."
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When I turned 16, my mother said to me: Stephen, it doesn't matter how old you get, you'll always be my little boy. Naturally, as a 16 year old boy, I cringed (inwardly, anyway).
Now I wish I could tell her I understand exactly what she meant.
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Dear Harold, This note is a very sad one. In fact the saddest I have ever written. Words are not adequate to express my sorrow or to indicate what the departure of your mother means to me. She passed away peacefully ... Her passing was just like the running down of a clock, gently to the end. About an hour and a half before she died, she said "Goodbye: Goodbye everybody", and her last words were to me, uttered when she was very weak, "Darling, I am all right..."
I'm not ashamed to say that made me tear up.
I got married a month ago, to a man I love very dearly. I think the way I put it best was to my aunt, maybe three years ago, when she asked me why I thought he was a keeper. I told her it was because every morning when I woke up, it made me happy to see him lying next to me. And that's it, really; I never fell in love with him, in any sort of big, obvious, butterflies-in-the-stomach way. I just realised that it made me absurdly happy to have him there in every small moment. I'm supposed to be too young to know what love really is, or how to do it right, but if being happy that you get to do the dishes with someone isn't love, I'm not sure what is.
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I'm not ashamed to say that made me tear up.
And how. And by a Prime Minister of New Zealand!
Thanks, Hilary. If anything ever deserved to be be called a gem, it's that.
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At this point I get to announce that my son has just finished high school and my daughter got her drivers license this week - we're no longer needed at all ....
I guess I just had one of those moments. Dragged out the large trampoline from under the magnolia, scrubbed it down, and a new owner dismantled it and took if off to a new home. I remember how my son and his friends used to jump off the garage roof on to the mat. So, I look upon the new style of trampolines (with safety nets) with some wonder.
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I told her it was because every morning when I woke up, it made me happy to see him lying next to me.
Yes. (Erm, not your husband, obviously. Mine. Heh.) I live in mild terror of something happening to him because I like him *so much*. He's my favourite. We still laugh every day, over eleven years later. Sometimes to the point of actually crying because we're giggling so much. Not that he doesn't sometimes drive me nuts, and I him. But it's never the kind of nuts where I doubt anything about us, fundamentally.
And speaking of fundamentals, I still don't know how to talk about my mother. I was mentally listing the things we don't agree about: some politics; gardening (she loves it, I hate it); cooking (she hates it, I love it); clothes (it's guaranteed that if she hates it, I'm going to love it); home decorating (her: wall-to-wall 70s brown; me: exploding pop-cultural clown), and then I was thinking about how much that stuff doesn't matter at all, because she is the most dedicated and loving and funny and delightful parent a person could ever ask for. I know she would do anything for me, and she's been that way ever since I can remember. I don't think you can overestimate how important that kind of foundation is to me as a person, and I am very grateful for it.
Also, anyone who is friends with me on Facebook knows that she is an endless font of malapropisms.
Stop me before I start talking about my big dumb dog.
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Today I drove down to Welly and back again to pick up my 28 yr old son who's coming back home for a while before deciding what next. While there I went to see my 101 grandmother who is still physically able and with a mind as sharp as a tack but can't see much so she's in a resthome. My mum(her daughter) is in Nelson and can't be with her for christmas and neither can I so she'll spend it in the resthome. It felt bad that I can't do much about it but was good to see her. This is the sad side of love I guess.
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Dear PAS whanau. Merry Christmas. With much love, respect and best wishes, Paul.
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I know I'm a day late but I have been at my lovely Mum's for a few days. So I hope everyone had a suitably relaxed day yesterday. I had a lovely day, and yes this is an appropriate forum to say that I love my family more than almost anyone else. They are the people I am my most authentic with. None of us are alike and yet we are all - well, 7 out of the 9 of us - so very similar. We are all pretty bossy, and fairly loud when we're together, and most of us are only really comfortable around each other, I think. They would say I'm wrong because until recently they always thought I was. The only one missing is my Dad. It's our fifth year without him, and his absence is keenly felt. He left a very large Tom sized hole and there just isn't any point trying to fill it. He was loud and bossy, and very loving, and we all loved him back very very much. He also absolutely loved Xmas - he was Santa in his red nightcap and nightshirt, and he played the part so well. He was the centre of our family, and we are all, still, a little lost without him.
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Best film for those intimately involved with Aspies, Max and Mary
I agree. It is lovely film, without flash or dash. Great touches of Australiana in the opening sequence, too.
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