Random Play by Graham Reid

You're taking the piss.

rising number of cheap liquor outlets

The number of "look alike" suburban outlets being opened is rather striking I have to agree. I wonder who is funding them? Hmmm.....I wonder how many we can get installed before the end of the RWC? Hmmm....

CHRIST also says that in the interests of promoting responsible home binge-drinking of alcohol a maximum-pricing regime should be introduced, with the aim of further reducing prices.

"Our study shows that RTDs, beer, wine and spirits should be made cheaper. It's outrageous that RTDs should be more than $1 a pop" says Dr Batemean, "when the road toll-reducing effect of making cheap liquor available in multiple outlets close to people's homes is taken into account. And some of the prices for Central Otago pinot noir, let alone single malt whiskey, are just not on."

"We are glad that the government has indicated further research is needed into the minimum-pricing recommendation made by the Law Commission. We would also oppose any move to increase alcohol excise tax. Our study shows it would be irresponsible to introduce such measures" Bateman says.

Great stuff Graham. Where do you get the time?

Taking this a step further why not make every home a liquor outlet.

I mean even walking/driving to my local liquor outlet runs the risk of a bit of biffo or anti social behavior.

I think we should start a fund to help Griffin realise he needs to start writing Mine For Me right now, 'coz it sounds epic!

The rest I loved (and +1 for the Eastes to hit the screen) but "the handicapped" is *so* last century, man.

WWJD?

What Would Jesus Drink?

He was a cheap B'stard. He got tap water and turned it into wine.

Now the local Priest has been supplying wine to kids on Sunday mornings for years, for free!

Liqueur is worse than le melody...

A new study by a Christchurch research unit has proven conclusively that the rising number of liquor outlets is having a beneficial effect on neighbourhoods and communities, and have more cost benefits for the taxpayer.

Coupled with a constant barrage of Classical music, the Chch inner city mall areas have become a far safer place to be, say the Chch Press - in a laughable front page article that sets a new high in the fine art of selective statistics, they compare the month of October in 2008, 2009 and 2010.

The number of anti-social incidents attended by city centre security guards, known as ambassadors, fell from 77 a week in October 2008 to two for the same week this year.

(and there were 16 reported in 2009 I believe), nowhere in the article do they give any comparative foot traffic, or usage numbers for the same periods, nor mention that in 2009 the area was a no go area due to "beautification and tram track laying" nor do they mention that this year the inner city is a virtual ghost town since the Earthquake, or that bus fares have now risen to $3.20. Nope, it's all down to Mozart!
aaah, April Fools in Spring, how quaint...
Oh and they don't mention the extra liquor outlets in the 'burbs as helping at all, ingrates!
Hopefully the mooted new service combining home milk delivery and discounted liquor will mop up any further problems...
;- )

a Mayor male trying to cope...

Supermayor Brown has promised to be “hands-on” when it comes to the small matters “and that way the big matters will look after themselves”.

Oh that we had someone of this calibre as mayor of Chch...
...after coasting back into office, by saying nothing about his intentions, Bob "sleeves rolled up" Parker (or his keeper Tony Marryatt) has now decided that he can't handle his day-to-day affairs and he needs an executive manager

The job description says the manager will help Parker "in all aspects of his official life that relate to council business". That included giving initial advice on papers, letters and questions directed to Parker, attending meetings with him and accompanying him to official functions.

The manager will also manage Parker's diary, aim to reduce his "administrative workload" and ensure he and the mayoress are prepared for meetings and functions.

The successful applicant will be responsible for managing a $200,000 budget, but the council would not reveal what salary the job offered.

Gee, so now we pay twice for getting the same job done - I am not a happy camper!

Bob, if you can't do the job, get out of the kitchen! - we don't need another cook!

Bob, if you can't do the job, get out of the kitchen!

But all the job entails these days is turning up to eat muffins.

- we don't need another cook!

True, we already have the ditzy faux-celebrity "mayoress". How the fuck did this happen? If Martin "curtain-twitcher-in-chief" Van Beynen's fawning drivel-piece on the Clinton visit is any indication of the mood of the local media, we're in for a few years of government by photo opportunity.

He was a cheap B'stard. He got tap water and turned it into wine.

He walked all over the stuff first!!!

Bob, if you can't do the job, get out of the kitchen! - we don't need another cook!

BOB: - THIS IS YOUR LIFE!!!!!

Bob "sleeves rolled up" Parker (or his keeper Tony Marryatt) has now decided that he can't handle his day-to-day affairs and he needs an executive manager

And he'll no doubt not be the last provincial Mayor to aspire to Auckland's new resourced Mayoral office. So he feels more important.

If Martin "curtain-twitcher-in-chief" Van Beynen's fawning drivel-piece on the Clinton visit is any indication of the mood of the local media,

I can continue to feel justified in my refusal to read that particular paper. My partner read parts of that article out to me whilst we were out having a coffee on the weekend. The level of my embarrasment of the article was about equal to your Mum getting naked at a barbeque and dancing on a table.

With respect to Bob. Auckland had a turn at allowing complacency to let the rot back in, so it is only right that we should have a turn as well.

Awesome work Graham.

But forswearing the Press means you'll miss out on all the really vital stuff, like the big upsurge in the night-crawling of the restless dead since the earthquake.

That is a sacrifice I will just have to make then. But I will have to take a look out the window now to see if I can spot any of them.

St Bob knows your innermost desires...
By forswearing the Press you'll also miss this:
Even though us ratepayers didn't know it, we have been pining, nay, gagging for a combined centre for our hallowed provincial musical institutions.
Enter St Bob who has in one fell swoop put an end to our insistent nagging with this coup de grace:

The Christchurch City Council will pay $2 million to help buy the Salvation Army Citadel for a trust that will run the facility for the Christchurch Symphony Orchestra, Southern Opera and the Christchurch Choir.

Mayor Bob Parker said yesterday it was "simply too good for the council to turn down". ...

...It would have an administrative centre, and a 350-seat auditorium meant it was ideal for a range of performances.

"The three musical groups can move into this community facility together, creating synergies and saving overhead costs," Parker said.

"This is definitely in the best interests of the city, both for cultural and economic reasons."

The council would borrow its share, he said.

It did not publicly consult on the deal because there was not enough time, Parker said.

sigh... it is deja vu all over again, again!

aaah! so that's where the edit button is now!

Thanks for the update on current research on the convergence between harm prevention and development of suburban shopping zones. Are you aware if the researchers are looking for new fields of research?

If so, might I recommend an examination of whether or not having half a dozen bookies on every high street has helped Austerity Britain more effectively redistribute surplus income between the gaming community and the off shore based gaming industry