Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: Popular Paranoiac Politics

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  • Hihi,

    Newman claims more than 10,000 signatories to the "Coastal Coalition" opposing the Marine and Coastal Area Bill

    A quick copy and paste into Excel, sort and remove duplicates knocks 12,000 or so down to 9,000. ZJ Poplawski of Timaru supported it so much he signed 6 times. That doesnt take into account the near-duplicates with one letter missing or changed capitalisation, obvious fakes like "john keys from wellington", shaelee is a poo eater, test test from Wellington and someone from the town of cunt, and lots of initials-only etries.

    Notable New Zealanders featured on the page include Kerry Bolton, Peter Shirtcliffe, Larry Baldock, One New Zealand's Ross Baker, and chief ancient Celtic conspiracists Martin Doutre and Noel Hilliam.

    Since Dec 2010 • 2 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso, in reply to Hihi,

    obvious fakes like "john keys from wellington", shaelee is a poo eater, test test from Wellington

    It just so happens that all of these people live on my street.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Greg Dawson, in reply to giovanni tiso,

    While there are many downsides to the name "Test Test", you do receive a copy of almost every mailing and trial product ever sent.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 294 posts Report Reply

  • HORansome, in reply to Hihi,

    Hey, Hihi.

    Technical question (because I;m writing on this topic at the moment); why did you use the term "conspiracist" to describe Doutre and Hilliam rather than conspiracy theorist? I'm not convinced there is a right or wrongness to whichever term gets used, but I'm just curious to know if you have any explicit preference for conspiracist over conspiracy theorist in this case?

    Tāmaki Makaurau • Since Sep 2008 • 441 posts Report Reply

  • Hihi,

    I dunno, maybe I picked it up off Reading the Maps. No real reason, other than it's shorter.

    Since Dec 2010 • 2 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso, in reply to Greg Dawson,

    While there are many downsides to the name "Test Test", you do receive a copy of almost every mailing and trial product ever sent.

    The chap's my neighbour. He has a panda bear named "George Robinson".

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • nzlemming, in reply to giovanni tiso,

    A panda conspiracist??? OMG we're doomed.!

    Waikanae • Since Nov 2006 • 2935 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson, in reply to nzlemming,

    They're all conspiracists, lemming. All those clandestine meetings gave them their characteristic dark rings around the eyes.

    Edit: Ooops I guess I meant conspirators.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Littlewood,

    I can’t believe we’ve got this far without mentioning Zenith Applied Philosophy, which always strikes as the ultimate in extreme cultdom, being that it actually infers on the believers a sense that they are genuinely a higher being (or at least can become one). I don’t know what it was about Christchurch in the early 80s, but from what I’ve heard, it seemed to have a surprisingly fervent (if small) group of followers, with one Dave Henderson being one of its more notable members.

    Today, Tomorrow, Timaru • Since Jan 2007 • 449 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Matthew Littlewood, 'inculcate' rather that 'infer' (__I__ think) - and Henderson is yet another outed exploiter following ZAP's guildelines...they stank around CHCH in the 1970's & 80's, and the fartemission is still high-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie, in reply to Matthew Littlewood,

    I don’t know what it was about Christchurch in the early 80s . . .

    It was the centre of the universe.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Littlewood,

    That website is quite incredible. I always suspected there was something different about Christchurch…
    I think this bit is my favourite:

    To most Cantabrians, ‘Zenith Applied Philosophy’ (Z.A.P or Zappers) public persona, was its high profile ‘open all hours’ fast food outlets - that proliferated central Christchurch in its heyday, the late 70’s and 1980’s.

    Luigi’s Pizza, The Dog House in ‘the square’, Farmer John’s Burger Bar in Papanui Road, The American Burger Bar, The Sandwich Factory, Roasters Restaurant etc.

    Z.A.P members were also enthusiastic proselytisers around the streets of Christchurch at this time, approaching strangers with open-ended questions like “are you worried about communists taking over New Zealand?” or simply “do you enjoy reading?”.

    How could you resist? Oh, and thanks for the clarification, Islander.

    Today, Tomorrow, Timaru • Since Jan 2007 • 449 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie, in reply to Matthew Littlewood,

    How could you resist?

    According to a first-hand account from someone who was lured to a phoney lecture on "zen buddhism" back in the 70s, the sight of lecturer John "Ultimate" Dalhoff's massive gut overhanging his Levis proved highly resistable.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    But, this being the internet, the truth is still out there:

    It's really impressive when the myth about the Moriori is the most accurate thing in a list of whackjob beliefs.

    At last a chance for all those who were considered for Dancing With the Stars, but were rejected because they couldn’t dance.

    I don't think you've actually watched Dancing with the Stars. Dancing ability not necessarily required - Rodney Hide for example.

    While there are many downsides to the name “Test Test”, you do receive a copy of almost every mailing and trial product ever sent.

    And you get to feel special when the roadie does sound check.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

  • DexterX,

    The term “politically correct” is an oxymoron and inappropriate. How can anything derived from or associated with the political sphere or process be correct or appropriate? Political outcomes are mostly always never optimal.

    The dilemma is illustrated in the range of scenarios that one can consider arise from the phrases, “giving your dog a bone”, “giving your dog a rubber bone “ and “giving your rubber dog a bone”. It is the circumstance associated with or that give rise to the phrase that are the nitty-gritty of the matter and not the phrase itself.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1224 posts Report Reply

  • David R, in reply to Felix Marwick,

    I usually just treat them with respect as I would any other person and tell them I am not interested.
    Did I do the abusing evangelicals story right?

    AKL • Since Sep 2008 • 21 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    “ are you worried about
    communists taking over New Zealand?”

    Only insofar as they might fail.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 5550 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Young,

    I would like to point out that Christchurch's ZAP period and general rightwing fruitery-and-nuttery was largely restricted to the eighties. In the late eighties, there was a Great Permian Extinction of sorts after 1987. Lots of Christian Right and raving right outfits went out of commission when the Lange administration won its second term. ZAP seems to have dekitsched to Auckland.

    I popped into the Western Destiny Bookshop to read the odd Robert Heinlein novel back in the eighties, before I became more notorious in my own right. Have to say I was somewhat bemused by the propaganda lying around there. It certainly wasn't all libertarian. Some of it was from the US John Birch Society and even the Australian League of Rights. Which is odd, because the ALOR* is anti-monetarist as much as it's neofascist. Leaving me to conclude that the raving right is prehensile when it comes to the question of economic policies.

    *The NZLOR is dead.

    Craig Y

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 573 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Young,

    All right, yes, there was the CHP, Maxim Institute and Right to Life NZ afterward, but RTLNZ is the only one left at the moment.

    Craig Y

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 573 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite,

    And...

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    __Do not calle up that wych ye cannot put downe__
    - H P Lovecraft, The Dunwich Horror.

    and

    IA! IA!
    PH’NGLUI M’GLUNAFPH DON BRASH OREWA ROTARY CLUB WAGH NAGL F’TAGHN!
    THE STARS ARE NIGH TO COMING INTO THEIR RIGHT ALIGN, LO!
    THE GREAT OLD ONE SHALL ARISE FROM BEING DEAD-BUT-DREAMING!
    WOE UNTO YE WHO UNBELIEVE!
    THE THING THAT SHOULD NOT BE, HE RISES!
    IA! DON BRASH F’TAGHN!

    Now here's something that would
    be hard to put down...

    A panda conspiracist??? OMG we’re doomed.!

    Black and White
    and Red all over?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7950 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    The Name of the Roadies *

    And you get to feel special when the
    roadie does sound check.

    ...and if you are of the Emo /Goth persuasion
    the roadie will give you the special attribution
    of "Test test, wan too..."

    * Is it Lola?
    an Umberto Umberto Echo?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7950 posts Report Reply

  • Kumara Republic,

    @ Craig Y: unfortunately, although movements like the ones you've mentioned have dissolved, a lot of them seem to regroup under different umbrellas with slicker PR machines, like FF, FtSoOC, et al. The SPCS still exists even after Patty Bartlett left the scene.

    The southernmost capital … • Since Nov 2006 • 5441 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Young,

    Yes, but in the case of the Christian Right, the recession is having a decided effect. Family First and Right to Life New Zealand are the only ones showing any semblance of activity. SPCS does still exist but it's slumped in a corner, trying to smuggle copies of Bunyan's "Pilgrims Progress" into prisons at present.

    Craig Y

    PS:
    IA! IA!
    PH’NGLUI M’GLUNAFPH MAD MOO CENTRE FOR POLITICAL 'RESEARCH WAGH NAGL F’TAGHN!
    THE STARS ARE NIGH TO COMING INTO THEIR RIGHT ALIGN, LO!
    THE GREAT OLD BORE SHALL ARISE FROM BEING DEAD-BUT-DREAMING! (IE: LIVING IN WHANGAREI)
    WOE UNTO YE WHO UNBELIEVE!
    THE THING THAT SHOULD NOT BE, SHE RISES!
    IA! MOORIEL NEWMAN F’TAGHN!

    Craig Y

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 573 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown, in reply to Matthew Littlewood,

    I can’t believe we’ve got this far without mentioning Zenith Applied Philosophy, which always strikes as the ultimate in extreme cultdom, being that it actually infers on the believers a sense that they are genuinely a higher being (or at least can become one). I don’t know what it was about Christchurch in the early 80s, but from what I’ve heard, it seemed to have a surprisingly fervent (if small) group of followers, with one Dave Henderson being one of its more notable members.

    Also, former Act vice-pres and anti-commie-panty-sniffer Trevor Loudon still proclaims himself a "student" of ZAP. No other party would elect someone as nutty as that to national office.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22848 posts Report Reply

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