Posts by Nik C

  • Up Front: Towards a Sex-Positive Utopia,

    Firstly, I would like a nominate Craig's "Verdant quim" for best phrase of the thread, although given the context, that's probably inappropriate.

    And Second, I would like to put forth the idea that sex ed communicates that A) masturbation is fun and will not cause your naughty bits to fall off and b) sex is fun and is supposed to feel nice. Because that, more than Catholicism or internalized homophobia curtailed having a functional sex life for quite some time. As a teenager I was taught that sex was this terrible *thing* that you should do when you turned 18, like voting and getting your full driver's license. It was all "Make sure you have a deep relationship with this BOY because if you DON'T it will RUIN your life forever and you may as well go sit in a fridge, slag" also, duct tape analogy and here are some awful pictures of STDs.

    Hopefully, in Emma's sexual utopia, there will be some emphasis on it feeling good. And a point that, you don't have to love the person, as long as you stick to SSSC, it's all good?

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Muse: Indecision '11: Fighting the Grey,

    Because there is a PTerry quote for every occasion: "My arse has been my arse for a very long time. I just don't have to listen to what it says."

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: It's Not Sex, and It's Not Education,

    From the odious "Your Views" section: "I also tell her (daughter) that girls want love, boys want sex."

    O RLY.

    As someone who's had sex ed within the last 6 years, it tends to be a mixed bag. At a private single sex school, we had the Family Planning Nurse come in and talk to us. (Very educational, although I was identifying as a lesbian at the time. Though I never *did* forget how to put on a condom)

    And then we had some happy clappy pro-abstinence people come and chat to us. But then we WERE a supposedly religious school, so I guess that was form.

    Neither, as far as I can remember, talked about LGBTQ issues. But then I went to a Queer Youth Group, and had the internet.

    As far as being taught about oral sex at 13, we had another FP nurse come into my primary school and ask us if we had any questions. I put down 'what is a blow job'. The nurse said it was oral sex. I thought she meant french kissing. I was corrected by a classmate later on. He also informed me of a penile rash called a lipstick remover. I'm still not sure about that second one.

    Honestly, get an FPA nurse to come in. They're brilliant, funny and professional. (And they do, contrary to what hysterical parents say, talk about abstinence.) It's better than learning off your classmates at any rate.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Muse: V.S. Naipaul and the Gentle Art of…,

    Diana Athil's response to him calling her work "feminine tosh" was quite amusing too. Basically along the lines of, "Lol, come at me bro."

    "I can't say it made me feel very bad. It just made me laugh ... I think one should just ignore it, take no notice really."

    Also: "At least I'm not married to Vidia."

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Respectably-Dressed Sensible…,

    Just once, I would like (and am glad) to see a discussion about rape that doesn't include concern trolling about how womens should cover up and stay in groups and not get drunk, ever, as if those three things are the main factors in people being raped.

    Also annoyed at the "LET ME EXPLAIN FEMINISM TO YOU" stance taken by a lot of men and women.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Say When,

    You are probably going to want to internet punch me for this, but I'm 22 and I worry about what's 'appropriate' to wear. I mean, I know there's a definite cut off date for short shorts and knee socks (NOT worn together, thank you.), but I'm not sure when it is. 25? I don't know.

    It seems that when you're very young, you can wear what ever you want. Then you hit twenties and until you're about seventy, your options keep getting more limited. Then you hit eighty, and stop caring, and wear whatever the hell you like, and wonder why you played by the rules for so long.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • 180 Seconds with Craig Ranapia - 12 December,

    How do you know that, Draco? Were you in the room with them?

    If they withdrew consent at any point, then it was rape.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: You People and Your Quaint…,

    Favorite line "I don't believe in bisexuals."

    ...every time you say that, a bisexual suddenly chooses a "side."

    Or you should reply,

    "Your intelligent and well thought out argument has convinced me. I am now <insert choice of sexuality>."

    Also: HM Westfold, the racist nutter who writes into local Wellington newspapers, has a thing about "Disgusting bisexuals."

    We do seem to cause much consternation. The biography point is interesting: I remember when the Cole Porter biopic came out, there was some snarling in the gay community about how he had been made 'straight' for a mainstream audience, and how too much emphasis was put on his relationship with his wife. God forbid should any man be bisexual, or anyone show signs of sexual complexity.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Discussion: Closer to Home?,

    I'll be moving to France next year, because my boyfriend's French and he wants to finish his degree. I wasn't planning to go overseas for a while, maybe in a couple of years, but I love him and I speak the langauge fairly well, so, why not? Hopefully I'll graduate and then fly out with him in April.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Discussion: Closer to Home?,

    I'll be moving to France next year, because my boyfriend's French and he wants to finish his degree. I wasn't planning to go overseas for a while, maybe in a couple of years, but I love him and I speak the langauge fairly well, so, why not? Hopefully I'll graduate and then fly out with him in April.

    Since Aug 2009 • 11 posts Report Reply

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