Posts by Deb Mudie

  • Hard News: A Century Since, in reply to Marcus Turner,

    I've been enjoying the Curnow readings on National Radio...

    I was about to say that very thing. They've been great listening, the last few days.

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Respectably-Dressed Sensible…, in reply to Emma Hart,

    I will put my hand up and admit to not ever having verbally obtained verbal consent from anyone ever.

    Interestingly, I can't remember the last time I didn't obtain verbal consent! Talk is a big part of my sexual interactions, and I find asking for what I want, asking whether they are up for doing x or y, and asking if this can be followed by that (or indeed, being asked), very hot. Implicit in that is the right to say no.

    It may be that years of BDSM, with prior negotiation and clearly understood safewords, has impacted to the point where with all sexual interaction I use a similar framework.

    Or that I just find communication really sexy...

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Respectably-Dressed Sensible…, in reply to Hilary Stace,

    It should be noted that the frilly parasol plan is for Auckland. And if it hoses down I shall go with vintage umbrella plan instead...

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Respectably-Dressed Sensible…,

    It now occurs to me that participating in the Demure Lady Walk (love the sarcasm) is an excellent excuse to show off my frilliest parasol.

    Because this demure lady is definitely also a slut, and proud to own the label.

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: Asking for a Contribution,

    Done. I've lurked on here for years, and am very happy to add a few $$ to the pot.

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: The Suicide Question,

    I feel it would be a mistake to make any changes to suicide reporting without also carefully examining other areas of news censorship and more poignantly the core belief structures that have combined to form this arbitrary set of standards currently in place, if for nothing more than to develop a more comprehensive approach to truth and transparency in the internet age.

    You make a very valid point, Chris. I forget that there is a lot of sensationalism in the news. I was thinking more in terms of comprehensive articles, discussions of how and why, than the individual loss itself. Which catches me by surprise - but it's so long since my own loss that my focus has been more on the overall.

    Do you think anything can change those core belief structures?

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Southerly: The Truth About Talkback,

    That was shudderingly good. And reminds me why I avoid talkback radio like the (locust?) plague ...

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: The Suicide Question,

    Finally delurking after thoroughly enjoying reading PAS comments for a number of years...

    I have a vested interest in this topic. After my mother killed herself back in 1999, I've found the media coverage, discussion, and avoidance around suicide in New Zealand to be most interesting.

    One thing I learned in the years following her death was that a large number of people know/love someone who has committed suicide - but most of them never talk about it, because there is a perception that talking about it is something just not done (see also: abortion). So for those suicide survivors there is a distinct lack of openness, discussion and support.

    When suicide is mentioned in the media, I found that most often the focus is on youth suicide. The statistics are terrible, yes, but they miss that an awful lot of adults are also killing themselves, for a wide number of reasons.

    The stimga on mental health is starting to ease. Perhaps the stigma of having a family member kill themselves; having tried to kill yourself; or having indeed done so, will start to pass.

    tl;dr: I am no fan of suicide, for sure. But I am a fan of openness and clear reportage. I think the restrictions need easing.

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 8 posts Report Reply