Yellow Peril by Tze Ming Mok

Mystery training

At the right price, scientists and top-level military from any country can be bought for the manufacture and procurement of WMDs. So the WMD proliferation ‘mystery list’ of 21 countries being targeted by the Immigration Profiling Unit should include countries with WMDs already.

At the risk of committing treason (this blog is hosted on a US server after all) one could speculate that this secret list should therefore include the permanent members of the Security Council – the UK, France, the US, China, Russia – and India and Pakistan. It should also include those with the obvious capacity to make them: Germany, Israel, Japan. The ones prancing around pretending like they can make them might make the list, like North Korea and Iran, but they might have to work harder. Ones like Iraq that might have had some biological weapons but then turned out not to have them after all, despite a fairly exhaustive invasion, might just end up getting struck off the list completely. Try-hards.

Still, about half of the world’s population is on that list. That’s quite a lot of people to not take trained scientists from, during a skill shortage of (according to the Immigration Service) chemists and microbiologists.

A more useful approach would be to take all of these dubious scientists, like the US did with former Nazi scientists after World War II, throw them in prison, and force them to make us our own WMDs. Maybe just mustard gas or something, because we don’t have any uranium or cool nuclear technology (which begs the question of why WMD proliferators would want to come here at all, unless they were retiring). Then everyone would bloody well have to listen to us at the WTO, Security Council, and the International Whaling Commission.