Posts by Lilith __
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Southerly: Getting There is Half the Fun, in reply to Susan Snowdon,
I don’t know how people laughed at this
Schadenfreude
I’m not laughing at David and Jen’s suffering, but at an absurd tale brilliantly told.
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I’m sure I’ve said this before in this forum, but the Spanish system has much to recommend it. Couples don’t share a name, children are hyphenated until such time as they pick which one they want to go with.
Some friends of mine thought up another solution: an invented middle-name for both the couple, intended as surname of future children. So they all share a name, but also keep their birth-names.
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Hard News: Who else forgot to get married?, in reply to Gareth Swain,
using their maiden names at work
"Birth names" is probably a less archaic term.
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Hard News: Who else forgot to get married?, in reply to Emma Hart,
I know a couple who kept their own names and blended them for their children’s surnames. Great idea .
We considered this. But that would have made the children’s surname “Dearhart”, and I am not that much of a sadist.
How Pratchettian!
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I think there’s some value in a couple publicly declaring their intentions; but I see no reason why people should have to get married for the relationship to be taken seriously.
My parents were living in a committed relationship and raising children together for many years before they were able to marry. They had both previously been married to other people and in 1950s NZ, divorce was only by mutual consent. One of the other parties involved withheld their consent, so no divorce.
Fortunately divorce law is different now, but I’ve known married folks get in terrible fixes because they feel it’s not OK for them to end the marriage.
A pity that marriage can still be used as an instrument for hurting people.
I think the decline of marriage as an institution helps us to see what a diversity of relationships have been hidden within it. There are so many different types of bonds couples form. And if you’re in a relationship that works, then good for you. It’s a big achievement.
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Capture: Two Tales of a City, in reply to Kumara Republic,
Red – we’re talking about local-body elections in Chch. Post-disaster politics make for a unique situation here I think. Literally everybody in Chch is tangibly affected by our Council’s decisions.
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Capture: Two Tales of a City, in reply to Hebe,
It’s hellishly difficult to get voters to turn out.
4 major disasters, grossly incompetent leadership, mass dissatisfaction and rage.
If people don't vote it won't be because of apathy.
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Capture: Two Tales of a City, in reply to Hebe,
Oh I wouldn't worry about Cantabrians being motivated to vote. It's impossible not to have personal feelings about Council here, I think.
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Southerly: Getting There is Half the Fun, in reply to Mike Dickison,
the last traces of David’s blood will have been washed from the driveway by the torrential freezing rain we’ve been having in Dunsandel.
Sounds like Alan Bollard has paid a visit!
David, I was feeling sorry for myself today, but your column has cured me! And the tears of mirth helped, too. I’m sorry you and Jen had to suffer to cheer the rest of us up.
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Capture: Upside Down, Inside Out, in reply to Nora Leggs,
Nora, these are really stunning!