Posts by Emma Hart
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Up Front: Say When, in reply to Danielle,
Dude, I fucking LOVE Wham!
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(Emma might find Black Swan's deployment of the depraved bisexual trope particularly amusing/enraging/nauseating.)
From what I have heard, I honestly cannot decide how drunk I would have to be to just laugh instead of get enraged.
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Yeah, I often find the 'you're a bad feminist because...' slut-shamers are a particularly small (but vocal) minority in these discussions.
Yeah, let me be more explicit* about this. This is one of those many, many cases where an argument always ends up in the same place, with the same few people. And it's exhausting and frustrating. So the great thing about things like TOFO and Megan and Boganette's Feminazi Boner-Killer Drinks is that they're a chance to get together, off-line, and remind ourselves that there are, in fact, lots of women who think the same way we do, to reassure and rejuvenate each other.
* oh stop it
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It must be fun being a child in your house.
Oddly, just on Saturday night, my son was sitting on the front porch with his head buried in his hands.
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It's just that the few men I've known who do think in those terms on a personal level, I regard as a bit sad and dysfunctional.
Yeah, and I think we benefit from highlighting how unusual the attitude is, because it makes those few who still have it look sad and pathetic. "Men" are not "the patriarchy", and I can't actually think of any man I know now who has a Madonna/Whore complex. There were a couple when most of the men I knew were teenage boguns.
That's not to write off or underplay the difficulties and pain suffered by women on the receiving end of that attitude. It's to say, we expect better of men because we know damn well they can achieve it, and we're not letting the boofheads off on an Animalistic Penis Brain basis.
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Erm.... could you change that "they" to "she" perhaps? Generalizations abound today.
Jacqui, the comment I'm referring to is anonymous. I strongly suspect it's a woman, but I don't know, so I use the closest thing we have to a neutral pronoun.
However, still no, because even in that comment thread there's more than one person arguing that line.
At Public Address, our first round of the argument is here, and the second is here, but over that period there've been others on sites like The Hand Mirror and Megan's Craft is the New Black. Hence why I'm quite happy to use "they" to mean "people who say things like the things I have attributed to 'them'", and why we've got to this point.
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Yeah, even for This Argument, that comment thread has some doozies. My favourite is:
Of course women (feminists) are going to be more 'pernicious' in their so called "slut-shaming" than men. Men,who are not gay and/or feminist, generally like sluts.
Followed by:
your Baywatch approach to empowerment Megan perpetuates the slut stereotype no matter how fiercely you kick and scream, and regardless of feminists.
So, yeah, we have: explaining to men what it is that they like and why, explaining to women why they do the things they do because they're too stupid to know, and a total obliviousness to the idea that sometimes, sometimes, the person looking at a woman? Is a woman.
So yeah, Gio, it's about Russell when they say 'men' just like it's about me when they 'women', and especially about me when they say 'women who enter wet t-shirt competitions'. It's very easy to forget, when making sweeping generalisations, that you are still talking about people, and I think we get better discourse from remembering that.
But then, I am just a slut, so what would I know?
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Is someone willing to volunteer to read it and give us the summary in 30 words or less?
I tell you what we'll do. If someone buys it, Megan and I will record it as an audiobook. She'll use her Radio Voice, and I'll use my "Turns Thomas the Tank Engine into Porn" voice.
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They did make us take marriage counseling, which was actually worthwhile in parts, and downright hilarious in others - the class on contraception was classic.
My cousin's eldest child was conceived while said cousin and her husband were in Christchurch for their Catholic marriage counselling.
You want to ban mosques from marrying people?
Would you like some more straw there, Angus? Of course this applies equally to all religions. Nobody ever said any differently.
Or Rastafarians from smoking herb.
I know I know, it's not exactly the same.
Indeed. The Rastafarians would only be affecting themselves.
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if the Marriage Act was updated to be gender-neutral, and two men wanted to get married in a church whose congregation they both belonged to, what would their legal options be in forcing the church to allow the ceremony?
This is a thorny. What I'd like to do is get rid of the situation we have currently where an ordained minister automatically becomes a marriage celebrant, which is a CIVIL function, not a religious one. Then as people became ministers, they could decide whether they wanted to perform a civil function, which they would have to perform in accordance with the law. If they found it unconscionable to marry same-sex couples, they wouldn't become celebrants.
They would still be able to conduct church marriage services, but you'd need a civil celebrant as well. This is the default position in France.