Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Disunited

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  • Mrs Skin,

    "You used to bully me a lot."

    High five, lady. That's awesome.

    It's not in the least reprehensible to call someone out on their crappy behaviour. And you did it without roundly abusing her, showing more self-restraint that I'd be prepared to attribute to myself in such a situation.

    the warmest room in the h… • Since Feb 2009 • 168 posts Report Reply

  • Hilary Stace,

    At a primary school reunion I was helping at I observed a victim confront a former bully. Both were in their 60s, and ended up talking about something that had made them both feel bad for decades, although neither had previously considered the others perspective. It is the sort of restorative justice that reunions can sometimes facilitate.

    Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 3229 posts Report Reply

  • mobsta,

    I saw my primary school bully on the bus once, he'd just got out of jail ... sometimes the last laugh is a knowing smile out the window

    heh.
    I had the opposite happen.

    Went to school with this real bad bastard.
    Leather jacket, smoked, bullied, stole money from the Telethon jar, you name it Terry did it (and this was intermediate!).

    Bumped into him on the street about 10 years later.
    Said he would buy me coffee...

    The first words out of his mouth as we sat down were..."Have you thought about God recently....?"

    I think I scalded my mouth trying to drink my coffee as quickly as I could.....

    wellington • Since Jul 2009 • 8 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle MacDonald,

    Awfully sorry to interupt, and I know this is very rude of me but...

    ACC are trying to drastically reduce funding and access for counselling available to visitims of sexual assault and childhood sexual abuse (Sensitive Claims.)
    Please help the counsellors and therapists trying to fight these changes by signing this online petition:

    http://www.petitiononline.com/ACC0909/petition.html
    Thank you muchly fellow Public Address readers

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 82 posts Report Reply

  • stephen walker,

    sometimes, steven, you speak with a level of clarity turned up to 11 on the volume control. but it needs to be heard. thanks.

    nagano • Since Nov 2006 • 646 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie,

    I put my name on the petition, but wheres the debates? could someone kindly link to it.

    Me too, but a little more info would be helpful. And I wonder, in the light of steven's comments, how ACC policy on these things has been influenced by the Peter Ellis debacle, where supposed victims received evaluation, and often substantial compensation, well before the first trial was concluded.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Steven, is it fair to say you are annoyed about the therapists taking it on themselves to speak out about this on behalf of their clients?

    That well-intentioned but disempowering behaviour is common in disability circles too - actually, any area where the beneficiary of action is assumed to be incompetent to speak for themselves. I know there are privacy issues too, and the social stigma about sexual abuse, mental health and disability. And the desire to get on with your life and leave that focus behind.

    Mind you, we don't have the cohesive and resourced networks that the practitioners have, so it often becomes a question of whether them saying something is better than nothing.
    Even if that means continuing to push a line that what is good for them is good for their clients. In this case, motivation seems to include straightforward preservation of a major income source, which might lead to some conflicts of interest in their advocacy.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

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