OnPoint by Keith Ng

I wholeheartedly endorse this reference.

To whom it may concern, you need not be. That is all.

If your organisation is going to import freedom why on earth don't you get it from the USA. I have it on the good authority of a former President that the Chinese and the Belarussians all hate freedom, and that is why they are selling it so cheap. American freedom is so superior and they love it so much that they will sell it to you for a mere power station or two. And for a substantial donation you could use Mr Key's personal tunnel that comes out under a bush in Texas.

The government is reconsidering its policy on Tobacco and will be recommending they convert their factories to canning the laughter of our children. We know there is a worldwide shortage of canned laughter, only held in check by the dominance of TV reality shows. However the new show The GC was greeted by laughter, which indicates what the audiences are really after.
We dont want the IRB or even Durex to be telling the world what we are good at, we want to be known as the first choice for young effervescent canned laughter

Belarus is so close to Russia.......... NZ Dairies.......Hmmm...is there any conspiracy ...er...connection .

This surely must be a c...ash crop.

PR: Smoke and mirrors.

Where can I find this worthy organisation...at the front or rear of Fonterra?

Mr Drummond personally walked from our Belarus depot with 19 cartons of cigarettes internally concealed within his person.

Studly dude.

Under the tits I think-

Research shows that most Studly Dudes who have tried Camels prefer women.

. . . most Studly Dudes who have tried Camels prefer women.

That's quite an image you've conjured up there, especially when you throw in 19 cartons of cigarettes internally concealed within one's person.

O but the huge vacuous skull-

I have also given a reference for Josh

Do people not now grow the ganja here? I mean, tobacco plants are a bit fussier, but not that much. Poppies aren't even banned here.

It may be difficult to preserve the tobacco traditionally, that being a fairly visible and noxious process, but that's where most of the carcinogens come from anyway, isn't it?

Surely a black market in loose tobacco products would be not only very easy to produce and distribute locally, reducing our trade deficit, but also better for the addicts. The growth in violently possessive underground groups would provide skill training for all our idle youth, the prison industry would thrive, and police would be kept on their toes.

Think of the economic benefits, people! Boost GDP today, break a window.

Do people not now grow the ganja here? I mean, tobacco plants are a bit fussier, but not that much. Poppies aren't even banned here.

I think I've posted it here before, but this is relevant.

Profound....

I think we don't get much home-grown tobacco because:
a. It tastes foul compared to the commercial stuff (in my experience anyway)
b. If you are going to the bother of growing something - why grow tobacco where 30 grams will sell for about up to $30 (assuming it will be discounted from shop prices) whereas alternatively you could grow pot and receive $250 - $350 per 30 grams.

Growing your own tobacco only makes sense as a hobby.

28 grams.don't rip yourself off

home-grown tobacco ... tastes foul compared to the commercial stuff

Yep. Pretty hard to get your home-grown stuff to taste like the commercial stuff unless you have a pharmacopoiea of additives available.

28 grams.don't rip yourself off

I always think it better to be on the generous side to customers :) Plus tobacco sells in 30gm pouches - so thought I would keep the comparison equal.