So. If any of you have brilliant and insightful questions you think I should be…

Yeah? I'd be interested to hear more about that.

That resonates. thank you.

Smaller than straights? Yes. Smaller than gays? No.

are we going to see Auckland (for example) as the getaway city for Bis to go to like Sydney traditionally has been for teh…

Interesting.
I have no difficulty with hugging or hongi-ing* & I especially like to clasp/shake/touch hands BUT!
I personally cannot stand anyone touching my hair/head.
I've cut my own hair…

When I was little, I loved nothing more than to play hairdresser with my grandmother. I'd give her mohawks and spikes and I think I…

I've never really thought of it as resulting from my upbringing. It's the general social environment as I recall it. It's not like I was hugging and kissing my Pacific Island and Maori mates, or the Chinese,…

That arrived ... a bit later in my life. I obviously hung out with the wrong people at varsity.

One thing that helped break the ice for me was discovering dance in my early twenties. It was initially a shock to be in physical contact…

But –

all that touchy-feely stuff was for the crazy arts students

Oh. Yeah. Called it. Our group was mostly sciencey boy-nerd types. But there were enough arty geeky girls to offset that, and because of…

I was brought up a bit like that,…

I remember having an excessively awkward conversation with my mother, sometime at the beginning of puberty, about why it was no longer okay for me to hold my father's hand in public. I didn't see how it was any…

I still remember how amazing it was to get my hair washed by someone else after having three days at home alone with…

I became acutely aware of this during a…

I can't do either one, not for male friends. An overlong handshake is about where it ends. Putting arm around shoulders,…

My elderly grandmother (since passed) said a few years ago to me that one of things she most missed since granddad died (over 30 years ago) was physical contact. She reckoned it was a big part…

My 'logical pattern loving' brain says there should be a continuum of touch, and the more extensive the touch, the more it's…

I do find it such a pity that our culture has developed taboos around touch. We are tremendously affected by touch, much more than we think. So I find it sad that the act of touching, carressing,…

Hate the game, not the player. Mostly.

There’s also the assumption inherent in the wording “straight girls who kiss each other in bars” that kissing each…

Dunno, it's just how it's done. Is there any right or wrong about it? Doesn't seem any more fucked up than, say, the rule that you should never touch a Thai on the head. It sends a…

This is a really interesting question. Or at least, 'holding hands' in our culture seems a bit fucked up. We hold hands with…

Unless you find that "playing into the patriarchal narrative that faux-same-sex-attraction will get a guy to think you are hot" is annoying in itself.

Well, much

Yes, I suppose there are always ... exceptions.

if indeed it is two drunk girls pashing…

Why did I react at a gut level as if it wasn't?

And not only is it performative, but that your sexuality exists for the male gaze.…

Lol.

Agreed. Recognition of that duality is important.

I've been thinking about this overnight, and I have mixed thinkings. Yes, it's more acceptable than it was for two women to kiss, and certainly more acceptable than for two men.…

I read Emma's post completely the other way. I'm interested in how you conclude that (eg) social exclusion apparently due to bisexuality is actually caused by alcohol abuse rather than resulting from it. Do you think people only…

IIRC, for adult men a "binge" is described as over 7 standard drinks in a sitting: lower for women and young people. But a…

That's the thing: while…

Eric, without getting into any form of implied or stated insult to you, I wish to express how totally I disagree…

I wondered why I had this occasionally craving to get off my face. Now I know. It's a substitute for mustard-gassing Kurdish tribesman, or other baby-bayonetting type activities.

Yeah, which is the focus of the research. I wonder (and this is a terribly cynical thing to say) if there was funding for alcohol research, but not sexuality research...

Even wealthy…

The $4.8 billion "social cost of alcohol" figure that gets bandied about for New Zealand relies on an assumption that anybody who…

Yeah, as a friend put it on Twitter yesterday, their 'binge' is our 'dinner'. Which can be hugely problematic as far as drawing meaningful conclusions goes. But…

Note that most of this lit calls binge drinking 5+ standard drinks in a single session. Or about two pints of decent beer.

The problems you note here are everywhere in the alcohol literature – it isn't just a failing around reporting around bisexual drinkers. Comorbidity between…