Public Address | Cafe | Up Front: Just Like Unicorns https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/ en-us Copyright (c) 2026 Public Address Isabel Hitchings https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311868#post311868 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311868#post311868 Sex drive is a thing. And sex between some people at some times can lead to reproduction. But I think it’s quite a leap to tie all sexual behaviour to a reproductive purpose.

Oh absolutely, we have sex for pleasure and social bonding purposes far more than for reproduction and…

]]> Thu, 01 May 2014 09:25:30 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311856#post311856 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311856#post311856 Sex drive is a thing. And sex between some people at some times can lead to reproduction. But I think it's quite a leap to tie all sexual behaviour to a reproductive purpose.

Eagles can mate hundreds of times a day in the breeding season. Does this increase their chances…

]]> Thu, 01 May 2014 01:38:10 +1200 Virginia Brooks https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311854#post311854 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311854#post311854 re: the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

Maybe a self medicinal mechanism which is more about biological fitness than reproduction – orgasm / sex being a way to both stimulate and soothe cramps – to release hormones to bring the necessary cramps on (to expel uterus…

]]> Thu, 01 May 2014 00:39:47 +1200 Moz https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311846#post311846 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311846#post311846 My point is that the correspondence between libido and fertility is tenuous.

I was thinking as I rode home that I've only seen this in fertile couples. Post-vasectomy it's gone away, so I wonder if it's not at least partly psychosomatic – knowing you can't get pregnant frees up the…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 22:24:58 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311844#post311844 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311844#post311844 Welllll…but also the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

That I’m not so sure of. Bonus time?

My point is that the correspondence between libido and fertility is tenuous.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 22:15:51 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311842#post311842 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311842#post311842 Wed, 30 Apr 2014 22:02:08 +1200 Isabel Hitchings https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311834#post311834 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311834#post311834 Welllll...but also the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

That I'm not so sure of. Bonus time?

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 20:57:42 +1200 Will de Cleene https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311792#post311792 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311792#post311792 If we'd stuck with matrilinear inheritance, there'd be no need for this bollocks.

Mitochondrial DNA is bringing matrilinear inheritance back into popular favour.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:44:51 +1200 Moz https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311789#post311789 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311789#post311789 gay sex isn't real sex because it can't make new life.

I'm guessing that STI's don't count? "darling, I made new life... lots of cute baby chlamidia bacteria"...

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:36:13 +1200 Emma Hart https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311788#post311788 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311788#post311788 I’ve attempted to define sex as a conversation held between bodies

Does this, to you, necessarily involve physical contact, or the participants being in the same space? Also, "between" seems to require at least two bodies.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:34:19 +1200 Anne R https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311787#post311787 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311787#post311787 Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:31:22 +1200 Bart Janssen https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311783#post311783 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311783#post311783 Welllll…but also the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

Just worth pointing out that men have cyclic horniness as well. It's just a diurnal cycle instead of monthly.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:17:55 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311782#post311782 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311782#post311782 I find it interesting that many women find our libidos match up neatly with our fertility – As if nature was quite invested in getting us knocked up

Welllll...but also the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:16:03 +1200 Emma Hart https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311780#post311780 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311780#post311780 Just google it … go on … I dare you

You may wish to take a moment to imagine how googling sources for this article went.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:10:47 +1200 Bart Janssen https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311777#post311777 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311777#post311777 (seriously some of that stuff is just so wrong :)).

Links??

Just google it ... go on ... I dare you

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 17:02:22 +1200 Isabel Hitchings https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311775#post311775 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311775#post311775 Wed, 30 Apr 2014 16:56:43 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311773#post311773 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311773#post311773 (seriously some of that stuff is just so wrong :)).

Quite a few animals have sex within families and also forcible sex. A lot of nature’s not pretty.

Those who want to read more (and there is a lot more!) might like to read Bruce Bagemihil’s Biological Exuberance…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 16:47:00 +1200 Russell Brown https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311770#post311770 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311770#post311770 (seriously some of that stuff is just so wrong :)).

Links??

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 16:32:07 +1200 Bart Janssen https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311766#post311766 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311766#post311766 Most sex anywhere in the animal kingdom does not lead to conception

That's mostly biology, which is what I guess you meant by the second bit. Specifically, humans are quite unusual in the animal kingdom as being fertile all the F*ing time. Most animals are fertile only at limited times,…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 16:27:01 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311760#post311760 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311760#post311760 For millions of years, things that made humans and pre-humans feel like they’ve had sex had a pretty high chance of creating a pregnancy and thus new human. Pleasure wasn’t guaranteed to give you a child, but that was its biological purpose.

George I agree that the impact of reliable…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 15:52:21 +1200 Lilith __ https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311758#post311758 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311758#post311758 Of course the Hebrew meaning of virgin was just to mean "a good woman."

Actually, a virgin was an unmarried woman.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 15:41:55 +1200 Stephen R https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311738#post311738 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311738#post311738 And, y’know, also, Bible, not written in English.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kIFTHoc-H0

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 14:19:47 +1200 George Darroch https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311737#post311737 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311737#post311737 Great post Emma. How also to deal with sexual acts and situations that might involve more than one other person? How to deal with people using electrons to stimulate each other over a long distance? It's an expansive concept.

I think the problem is that we're still getting used to…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 14:06:59 +1200 Emma Hart https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311735#post311735 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311735#post311735 Part of the issue there is about being certain any child is in fact the progeny of the husband – hence the importance of virgin bride.

Absolutely. If we'd stuck with matrilinear inheritance, there'd be no need for this bollocks. It's so much easier to know who someone's mother is.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 13:54:21 +1200 Bart Janssen https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311734#post311734 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311734#post311734 "have they done nothing that could lead to babies?"

Part of the issue there is about being certain any child is in fact the progeny of the husband – hence the importance of virgin bride.

I like the idea of virgin territory, it invokes the sense of wonder that comes…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 13:53:08 +1200 Emma Hart https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311733#post311733 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311733#post311733 "If you and your partner are wondering whether you're having sex, you probably are."

I really like Scarleteen's 'something you do to express your sexuality'. It comfortably accommodates why some kinksters consider BDSM to be sex, and others don't. BDSM practice that includes no conventional sexual contact whatsoever is still…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 13:49:05 +1200 Emma Hart https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311731#post311731 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311731#post311731 Interesting in the biblical sense. The Church insists on the “Virgin Mary.” A whole society is built around this idea. Of course the Hebrew meaning of virgin was just to mean “a good woman.”

Yeah, I think it’s one of those things it’s really important to keep pointing out: “virgin”…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 13:38:28 +1200 linger https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311715#post311715 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311715#post311715 @paul
nice … I think I’d add though, given that each person responds differently, that any time you try something new / with a new partner, you are exploring what is, for you (individually or mutually), virgin territory. So it’s a continuing process.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 11:56:34 +1200 Tom Beard https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311709#post311709 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311709#post311709 Wed, 30 Apr 2014 11:48:23 +1200 Gregor Ronald https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311708#post311708 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311708#post311708 Wed, 30 Apr 2014 11:47:25 +1200 Ianmac https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311699#post311699 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311699#post311699 _"That was the beginning of a process of thoughtful consideration which has brought me firmly to one conclusion: virginity doesn’t exist. It doesn’t exist in any kind of objective scientific sense, anyway. It’s pure social construction. "_
Interesting in the biblical sense. The Church insists on the "Virgin Mary." A…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 11:27:43 +1200 Paul Campbell https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311680#post311680 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311680#post311680 I was reading this MeFi thread yesterday which ended up covering many of these same topics – in it someone made this great suggestion:

I think it would be awesome if losing your virginity was redefined as when you first had great sex (consensual and mind-blowing-ly pleasurable for both [or…

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 10:11:11 +1200 Public Address https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311679#post311679 https://publicaddress.net/system/cafe/up-front-just-like-unicorns/?p=311679#post311679 Discussion from blog post.

]]> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 10:11:11 +1200