I was wrong

And he doesn't seem to be blaming Cunliffe for his…

"Defence lawyer Steven Zindel argued there was little or no impact on the 4 year old victim and there was no coercion.

"There's not the coercion, I know that is because she is young. There is also no immediate effect on her."

WTF! I thought Rosemary was a little…

I would hazard a guess that most young men do not actually know what rape is, both the legal definition and (sorry to put my foot in my mouth here) those who victims definition.

Before I…

Rape on the stage, comic musical theatre from the 50s. Repopularised by the now outed dirty old man Rolf Harris in the 70s.

http://sniff.numachi.com/pages/tiMADERA.html

No offence taken at all. I know I'm ignorant on this.

I understand the point about practice based evidence, it is really important to listen to patients. For me the issue with evidence…

Ask a child, taken into care because of violence in the home, what they feel, what they want....

They will talk about the anger and frustration that is always simmering, always a look away. One wrong move.....one more can of beer.

Fear…

I have a lot of respect for the mental health advocate who told me "what we need more of is practice-based evidence, not evidence-based practice". She meant respecting what people with actual experience of mental illness say. Not just those who have read textbooks or been paid…

vindication at last

Yep, I'd go along with that Jan,

"So many of our community organisations have been silenced by gagging clauses in their contracts, or just by the knowledge that some organisations have lost funding for doing too much advocacy."

No funding. All the funding for Legal aid was slashed. No funding = no representation.
Our rights are being systematically undermined . Our rights in the Courts are being eroded. Our Democracy is…

Heartbreaking to see the look on her face when the police buggered up the Roastbusters case. All those years trying to get justice, then she voluntarily enters the lions' den to try and educate....then realises nothing much has changed. Just a…

What they hand down is the status quo. If a…

So, how do we change these two groups?

Our family used to watch the telly news and hear complaints about the police and the legal system and actually, to our…

While I commented on the criminality, I really want reiterate, I am not an expert in this. It really may not be the…

Oh yes, definitely. There is also a need to have sentences in line with similar violence. What I wanted to say was that increasing sentences does not reduce the criminal activity.

Ah sorry Steven I got that completely wrong.

The key for me is that I do NOT have the necessary knowledge. On this subject I am ignorant. I have read some general stuff from purely the…

Not even a micron of pathetic there. And you know, I think you're right — at least Rodney's "reluctantly" wrapping his brain around this but as long as he has a media platform very people have, I hope he (and his editors at The…

NO! I'm talking about a person who I don't like,…

Thanks reciprocated — I'm pissed off at those columns NOT even a little bit at everyone here who didn't agree with my read, but genuinely heard and respectfully engaged with it. That's progress.

I see where you are coming from. I just thought that the overall tone showed progress as there is a hint of an apology towards Maggie later in the column.

Jason:

With all due and sincere respect, Rodney could have made his points without trolling Maggie Barry whose harassment by Rolf Harris doesn’t…

I have only one thought for that man .....
Diddums

Hey I can't stand the guy most of the time but I think in this instance his attempt to understand Rape Culture is a good…

Rodney says..

"I have reluctantly concluded that New Zealand does suffer a rape culture.

It’s not an “all men are rapists” and “I…

What I mean't to say was, " if a person is convicted of rape/sexual assault, and the victim demands that the rapist lose any right to name suppression, then name suppression should be automatically lifted."

I was not speaking about some scrote…

Oh yes I agree, my point being without naming the dickwad was if National gave her direction if she wanted to name under priviledge it would make mockery of the…

All the same, it wasn’t all that long ago that Martin Devlin was in court for various misdemeanours. Before his name was revealed, John Campbell, Simon Dallow, and Mike McRoberts were all…

Regardless of what the wriggly arsed, slimy, bottom- feeding, scum- sucking lawyers demand, or what the Judge (who was formerly a…

Well, let’s have that discussion without buying into bullshit like this:

Forget Rolf Harris, Maggie. He’s behind bars. Do the right thing and name this self-confessed…

Oh, go away Paul. Perhaps Barry doesn’t take ethical advice from that particular corner…

YUk yuk and yuk. The head office will only be soiling their name if they would do that. It makes a mockery of anything she says now.

No, edit.

All abused children know the difference.

Just ask an abused child.

There's a long and thoughtful discussion about problems with the age of consent here. I don't really want to get into it on…

I have always had a soft spot for the ODT.

At the risk of the sky falling and a plague upon my house I did....I went there...and, minor surprise...…

Indeed.

I can see why Maggie Barry seems unlikely to use her parliamentary…

"Rape", "unlawful sexual connection"... is there any difference? Really?

Especially when we're talking about a child....under the age of consent...and a MUCH older offender.

There is…

Just to note, 12-15, it's unlawful sexual connection. For a rape charge, which carries higher penalties, you have to prove he didn't have consent.

That the jury actually had to have a discussion after seeing the evidence says it's not the end of the story. It says everything about the problem that this thread is discussing.

To deem that a…

I get this...the" bad things" that can happen to an innocent person falsely accused of sexually assaulting a child can be grave, even fatal. I have knowledge of two such cases...one involving a schoolteacher, who,…

Just wanted to shout out to you in particular I remember ages ago commenting on here and sometimes finding the way you were coming across a bit 'challenging' I feel like…

All the rapist has to do is…

....and this will be done how?

While those who are the predominant victims of rape are trying to stay safe/ survive/protect one another, each in our own way, it would be really useful to have a discussion…

My guess is that I have consciously focused on men raping women in my comments. I do recognise that women are capable of similar violence and that men are also rape victims (from both men and women). But in the interests of addressing…

Thank you Danielle, Jackie and Emma for speaking my thoughts, it's such a privilege to know there are women who fully, fully understand and are able to speak.

It's also a great privilege to have anything to do…

What on Earth do you mean, Steven? You're coming across as insulting and offensive.

Which is yet another example of the rape culture in which we exist.

But is the teasing of the mean boys really going to be enough to make Labour back off?

Making…

This is rape culture. In centuries past, the perp/s would have been called a conqueror/s. Victim blaming is a crime. Thank you Katrina you are incredibly brave.

No problem, Jacks. But which part? I don't want to be writing essays on this thread.

I've always had this thing where I just love night-time. I especially love running alone at night in the dark. I've never felt scared, maybe because I grew up on a farm where the same perceived dangers just are not there. Or whatever. I actually…

Rereading that, it sounds terrible. I'm not saying feminists only shout. Just that when it's them vs rape culture that's how it goes down, because they've…

I don't know about that. Rape culture isn't just about raping or not raping, it's about the conditions that…

And it's happening to men. I'm not being picky but pointing out that it's a culture of respect for people that needs to be engendered.

And look what happened when Cunliffe apologised. Reading comments in different places as well as here. he was belittled. He stood tall, he would not retract and yet even the PM…

Hear, hear.

This is everyone's problem. It's happening to women in everyone's workplace. It's happening by men in every social…

Yup and I was aware of it.

But you know, I think, I really think, that if a political party chose to make it THE ISSUE, they could. Because when push comes to shove most of the rest of…

And that women have…

And as Melissa McEwan rather sharply, and correctly, puts it in her Rape Culture 101:

Rape culture is refusing to acknowledge that the only thing a person can do to avoid being raped is never be in the…

Yes. This.

"Is there anything males need to be taught, other than to just Stop?"

Yes there most certainly is. I'm a mother to…

We need to stop thinking and reinforcing the view that things like this don't happen in the spaces that we inhabit.

I had typed something about empathy and respect (for ones self and others) but I fear for some thats a step too far along the being a human path, stop is…

Yes, and we’ve been through this all before. They need to learn what rape actually looks like. They need to learn to call their mates out when they keep pushing after a ‘no’. They need to learn…

Is there anything males need to be taught, other than to just Stop?

The Kiwiboil crowd seem to think that rape culture only happens in the…

Why are we still using "teach women to do stuff" arguments anyway? I'm sick of learning all these fucking things. Let's teach some men to do stuff for a change.

And it can also disappear a lot of abuse victims for whom "self-defense" wasn't an option. Some years…

It’s one of Labours policies Here is a bit of it.
Labour will allow the Law Commission to complete its review on alternative…

The last time I was raped, which was not a million years ago, it was in my own bed, by my then-partner. Like so many…

How about, if possible name names. A friend of mine in the supermarket one day noticed a man who had raped her many years before. I think she needed to say something , anything, at that moment,…

So important that we hear the voices of survivors. They…

There is a subset of rapists who are in a desperate state of mind and likely to badly beat or even kill their victim. You want to introduce weapons into this situation?

This is a very good question. The simplistic answer is that we have a legal system that dictates that all crimes will be dealt with under…

So, if you don't do…

Katrina, Jackie says it well. Thanks for your courage.

To Abbie. If there was video evidence of an assault of a sexual nature on a child....under the age of legal consent...why in god's name was there a trial? Surely, in a civilised…

I will quote this in the real world next time it comes.…

One of the things that I have long resented is the fact that when the paedophile on our commune was discovered, the adults decided not to report it to the police. They said that they made that decision to protect us…

One of the most useful phrases I’ve run across to describe it is “You’re soaking in it.” It’s such a pervasive and omnipresent…

I once sat as a foreman on a rape trial, and from where…

If he rapes again it is the fault of every single person in NZ. It is the fault of the police, it is the fault of the lawyers, it is the fault of the legal system, it is…

Things that are entirely focused on her. Counselling, absolutely. Her home being a safe place, where she could talk about it, or not talk about it and watch a bajillion episodes of Castle instead.

If, for her recovery, it was important to her to…

I understand. What would you advise?

This. This was also the decision I made, again on multiple occasions, that I would be putting myself through hell for absolutely nothing. And would I advise my daughter to lay a rape…