Since my husband has decided to grow his hair long to approximate the style of Jon Bon Jovi... ...hairbrush plucking has become an increasingly significant feature in my life...

...a veritable follicle à deux
oh well maybe you'll get a shag out of it...
;-…

I'm considering it alongside various other suggestions for the much anticipated sequel.

More please, yes! On any subject at all. I would read you on how to make scrambled eggs or pluck hair out of a hairbrush or watch paint dry, frankly.

Plus, you and David are a stellar argument…

But cheers Jeremy and Bart for the blokes back-up.

Yes, I should have had this guys balls – don't think I wasn't tempted. I had thought of suggesting he pirouette on his pointy member till…

If you are going to write lewd suggestive and sexual posts you damn well should make that clear in the title!

Otherwise I might miss it.

A lovely post and I really think your husband should be rewarded for his part in bringing this to us…

Any chance of hearing the inside dirt on the ballet industry as a follow-up?

you could call it PAS de dirt......
or maybe Pirouettes of the Caribbean

I have always wondered too about the reason ballerinas have to stand on their tippy-toes. Why don't they just get taller ballerinas? :-)

Or chop most of the feet off and just run the stumps down to points.

Any chance of hearing the inside dirt on the ballet industry as a follow-up? Have your toes ever recovered?

I have always wondered too about the reason ballerinas have to stand on their tippy-toes. Why don't they just get taller ballerinas? :-)

Both have that self-deprecating humour that draws us into the – I don't know – the humanity of it all.

Long live the humanity!

The suspected dissing was a comparison of yours and Sally's writing styles?

No, on the contrary, I'm very happy to be compared to Sally (although I don't know about the reverse)! It was the learned to write at a "community night school creative non-fiction writing workshop" bit that…

and Chris – you're right, it's not work unless you get paid...

I didn't have my glasses on when I read that. I got it first time as "not work unless you get laid". It seemed to make sense....

plus you don't have to worry about the beer's feelings. ;)

... because sometimes it's a lot easier to find a beer that will love you unconditionally. Jus' sayin'.

I seem to be getting a little paranoid. Particularly with respect to possible dissing of guest writers on Public Address.

The suspected dissing was a comparison of yours and Sally's writing styles? There is a similarity – both outrageously funny and droll. Both have that self-deprecating humour that draws us…

I shall issue you with a big platonic hug....

...as opposed to the grip of unfriendly plate tectonics

This so makes me want to go to Crete.

why even the sand there is hard!
To quote Neddy Seagoon (or was it Eccles, or an interchange betwixt) on arriving on Crete:…

I can't believe this thread. I am appalled. This is not the sort of drivell that I, a clean (ex) anglican lad should be exposed to on this blogsite.

A modicum of decorum please.

It was Crete was it Sally?....so long....…

Pubic Address

National Archives printed a brochure a few years ago that claimed they were the "keepers of the pubic record". Now that would be a gripping read...

Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich

I am *so glad* that someone else besides me uses this band as a punchline. :)

The recipient of the blowjob will experience a smooth and cooling effect. Beer has a similar effect

It does, plus you don't have to worry about the beer's feelings. ;)

What with earthquakes, no sewerage, Tower Insurance, the Christchurch City Council (No) Help Line, various medical issues, and the fact that members of the band Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich have been spying on me…

Dairy products. Yes or no?

Unsweetened yoghurt. The recipient of the blowjob will experience a smooth and cooling effect. Beer has a similar effect but make sure you burp before you blow.
Why doesn't Wendyll Nissen discuss this in her food columns?

This is all getting out of hand!

Hand to mouth surely?

That august body is notoriously tight-lipped.

But they'll swallow anything.

(It appears that #surnamegenitalia has permanently affected me.)

Ancient Guild of Knob Gobblers

That august body is notoriously tight-lipped.

the night school David and I attended in our formative years to learn – together

I think David's problem was that he believed them when they said the course fees would soon repay themselves in commissions from grateful editors.

Hopefully the first in a series of instalments of the spin-off blog we have all been waiting for:

Public Undress...
air your soiled linen

pianist en vie...
Meanwhile I hear the Liberace Museum in Las Vegas is closing... another sign of the impending final days....

I think I've offended David and/or Sally with my comment and I'm not sure why.

I thought David was being ironical. Possibly not. I know you didn't mean any ill.

It was only my eagle eyes that prevented us from registering www.pubicaddressbooks.com — and, of course, I'm sorry that we didn't now.

I am very grateful that when, say, writing return addresses on parcels of books:

– it's very easy to turn an i into an l if you catch…

Their writing style is similar, is all I mean. This is not a bad thing!

In a marriage, it is important, above all else, not to make things worse than they are already.

A truer word was never said, by Shakespeare or anyone else.

Did Sally take the same community night school creative non-fiction writing workshop as David?

Russell, Sally, and I have been emailing this morning and — funnily enough — I just sent the following message:

Probably some of the comments will be quite annoying, but we're only going to allow you…

It was only my eagle eyes that prevented us from registering www.pubicaddressbooks.com — and, of course, I'm sorry that we didn't now.

Not too late, I hope? An anthology along those lines could be our best-selling title so far. I'm sure we've all got a few stories up our, er,…

'My first blow-job once I'd really got the hang of it'?

Hopefully the first in a series of instalments of the spin-off blog we have all been waiting for: Pubic Address.

It was only my eagle eyes that prevented us from registering www.pubicaddressbooks.com — and, of course, I'm sorry that we didn't now.

And I must say, Jolisa, that this post…

Shakespeare failed to include the words 'blow job' in any of his sonnets, or even to liven-up the duller patches in Hamlet with a fellatio scene.

Actually, you're not…