I think, for example, that David Irving is better described as 'fiction writer', rather than 'historian'.

I think a lot of historians would take offence at having David Irving called a historian.

I think, for example, that David Irving is better described as 'fiction writer', rather than 'historian'.

I daresay the point I am missing is why people bother writing "alternative" versions of history.

It's considered to be largely worthless amongst the historical profession, though there are exceptions.

Amongst writers of fiction... why not?

I daresay the point I am missing is why people bother writing "alternative" versions of history.

Things happened when they happened and the way they happened, nor all thy piety and wit... etc.

Unless it's to prove that they are clever dickies.

Well, I think military historian Sir John Keegan…

Things happened when they happened and the way they happened, nor all thy piety and wit... etc.

Unless it's to prove that they are clever dickies.

Or is there some other point that I am missing?

Yup, we're referring to a 1995 novel by Mark Lawson (Idlewild, or, Everything is Subject to Change) where John F. Kennedy survives the assassination attempt in Dallas, then wins a second term which ends with him (not Johnson) reviled for…

Is Idlewild the book that has protesters besieging the White House chanting 'Hey Hey JFK How many kids did you kill today?'

Indeed — though I don't think that's a Lawson invention. Though the convention of conspiracy nuts convinced that Teddy's drowning wasn't an accident, and his brother must have…

Is Idlewild the book that has protesters besieging the White House chanting 'Hey Hey JFK How many kids did you kill today?'

There was a geezer in front of me at Shihad with the immortal T- shirt slogan, in large Gothic white letters on black:
Everything Louder Than Everything Else.

Briiliant! He looked totally munted too…

The funniest thing about that shirt would be linking Britney's name to other 3. Bound to upset some serious old rockers, that would.

The really sick thing about it is that the infotainment-industrial complex wouldn't see the joke. Could you imagine what pictures of Suicide Barbie in a puddle of…

There is something about the age of 28. A very good friend of mine who is a professional psychologist in Auckland is a firm believer many people go through a huge crisis at that stage. There is a New Agey theory it is all to do with Saturn's cycle…

Jimi, died at 28
Janis, died at 28
Jim, died at 28
Britney, 27 and the countdown's begun.

The funniest thing about that shirt would be linking Britney's name to other 3. Bound to upset some serious old rockers, that would.

And completely apropos of nothing, Heath Ledger dead at 28. Bugger — twenty eight is far too young to die, full stop, let alone of a suspected overdose of sleeping pills.

It is, nonetheless, a popular age to die famous: Hendrix, Janis, Jimbo ...

But yeah. Bummer.

And in…

And completely apropos of nothing, Heath Ledger dead at 28. Bugger — twenty eight is far too young to die, full stop, let alone of a suspected overdose of sleeping pills.

It is, nonetheless, a popular age to die famous: Hendrix, Janis, Jimbo ...

But yeah. Bummer.

-ing

I think I just worked out how to spell and anecdote the Simon McKinney used to tell:

Verbal picture of school principal's speech in assembly. Students nodding off, staff doing crossword etc. Principal commences (in slightly pompous'd accent):

Now boys, there's one word which I have been hearing around the school…

The actual phrase was "Move over you Welsh bastard," which is almost affectionate here, but a terrible thing to call a decent churchgoing boy from the valleys.

Heh... until you get 'em liquored up, and then you start hearing some words that aren't in The Bible or any hymnal I…

A greater mystery is how voting for the Academy Awards happens.

How about network standards and practices? Battlestar Galactica exec. producer/head writer Ron Moore has noted the irony that while the network has been (often surprisingly) supportive of a show that is premised on the near-total genocide of the human…

Try having a fiery, but literal-minded, AS teenager, who has perfected the vowel-less "fuck". As far as he's concerned, he's saying "f-ck!", so he's in the clear.

There is a Terry Pratchett novel – The Truth, I think – where a villainous heavy frequently says "-ing!"

As in "It's a…

Pity about Marlene exploding – she was about the only interesting character.

Yup – and that was the point when my willing suspension of disbelief faltered. The only reason I can see why she was hustled behind the screen was to avoid the film getting slapped with an R or…

I used to know someone who once addressed some visiting US businessmen more or less thusly:
"Welcome to New Zealand. We say what we think in meetings, we swear a lot, and you can't sue us. Understand that and we'll get along fine."

About eight years ago there was a…

Obviously true. But…

My daughter is hearing-impaired, and often used to pick things up not quite right. I did wander down the hall once to hear her singing the Inky Wanky Spider song.

I have a niece who, when aged three, was heard running around the house singing the Warehouse jingle 'The Warehouse!…

This is not to say that my lectures are not liberally seasoned with Anglo-Saxon, unfortunately.

Try having a fiery, but literal-minded, AS teenager, who has perfected the vowel-less "fuck". As far as he's concerned, he's saying "f-ck!", so he's in the clear.

Tell him he cnt say that. (That's a vowelless and punctuationless can't, not a vowelless cunt.)

'Gollum with 'roid rage' went through my mind

Maybe it could have been a giant marshmallow man – or has that been done?

At less than 80 minutes it (just) avoided outstaying its welcome.

True. It was about the right length and as a roller-coaster ride it was OK.

Really,…

Sort of ambivalent about Cloverfield – it's a bit too generic 'monster-attacks-people-flee' and the monster was just a boring monster.

Yup, seeing it in daylight at the end was a bad, bad move. 'Gollum with 'roid rage' went through my mind, which I hope wasn't the intended effect. And the…

"I'm just sucking my thumb," she would say, loudly, in public. (Say it out loud to yourself to get the full effect, 'tho not if you are…

My favourite/least favourite/t-shirt slogan ever: I eat more pussy than cervical cancer

Actually felt ill when I saw it, which surprised me.

DIFFERENTLY ABLED!!!

Dead White European Male: Metabolically-challenged high albedo geographically displaced person of inadvertently hegemonic gender identity.

Saw a woman once wearing a T-shirt that read 'Don't stare, grow your own.'

And Control has John Cooper Clark as himself performing 'Evidently Chickentown' – very fast and it isn't 'bloody' that he says. Quite a tongue twister – makes 'She sells sea shells' look easy, even…

Try having a fiery, but literal-minded, AS teenager, who has perfected the vowel-less "fuck"

Must try that sometime... I used to be quite fond of the 'obscenity-saver', which Terry Teachout explains much better than I could:

Kingsley Amis introduced the concept of the "obscenity-saver" in his extremely funny novel Girl,…

"Welcome to New Zealand. We say what we think in meetings, we swear a lot, and you can't sue us. Understand that and we'll get along fine."

I've interviewed Brent Hansen, the New Zealander who ran MTV Networks Europe for years, and he said that when he behaved like a…

It's basically exploring the idea that Kiwis swear more in the normal run of things

I used to know someone who once addressed some visiting US businessmen more or less thusly:

"Welcome to New Zealand. We say what we think in meetings, we swear a lot, and you can't sue…

I have a pretty foul mouth too, at times. I did lay off it a little some years ago when I came into the family room and found my then two year old daughter hammering away on her wooden peg toy, and saying, "Damn. Bug. Bug. Damn."

Fine coming out…

Basically she's done a lot of mostly ephemeral TV work (including Law and Order), a swag of lecturing at US colleges, and has recently written a children's book, which seems a waste of her unique talents.

Also has been…

They maintained that Brits were very polite – I assured them that that politeness simply meant they didn't like you very much. Stiff upper lip = fuck off out of my face type of thing.

I have a firned who works in Japan, and he said after a while it's…

Fran Lebowitz

What is she doing nowadays – Lebowitz seems to have turned into a more sociable Salinger, which is a shame. How can you not adore someone who once wrote an essay titled 'When Smoke Gets in Your Eyes... Shut Them', containing this observation:

I understand, of course,, that…

I did wander down the hall once to hear her singing the Inky Wanky Spider song.

Heh. Well, all those arms I guess...

This is a blog I wrote a bit back when I got into some trouble at Bardic Web with a US writer who was offended by my normal manner of expressing myself. It's basically exploring the idea that Kiwis swear more in the normal…

Meh. I'm not big on being offended by profanity. Either they're not trying to be offensive, and don't deserve it, or they ARE trying to be offensive, and shouldn't get the satisfaction.

Indeed – and you may have noticed I'm not exactly shy when it comes to the use of…

Fine coming out…

I guess I’m the only one who would find a tee shirt with Old C**t on the front and Old Coot on the back fun.

Probably not, but I'd leave it at home come the next PA System barbie. I can't imagine bing given a F2F ticking off by Deborah,…

Would it be all right if they were referring to a happy person?

Only if they're about a hundred and twelve.

But anyone who uses the word 'gay' in my house better be referring to a homosexual, otherwise they're going to be asked to step outside. Not for a fight, just so I can shut the door when them on the other side.

Come come now Emma, that attitude's all a…

Last night at the movie, I saw a guy wearing a t-shirt that said 'My anger management course is really f***ing me off' (asterisks in original) which was sorta funny in a cringe-inducing way, if that makes any sense at all.

I can't imagine ever being offended by something written…

But anyone who uses the word 'gay' in my house better be referring to a homosexual, otherwise they're going to be asked to step outside.

Would it be all right if they were referring to a happy person?

Last night at the movie, I saw a guy wearing a t-shirt that said 'My anger management course is really f***ing me off' (asterisks in original) which was sorta funny in a cringe-inducing way, if that makes any sense at all.

Yeah, I think the key is, if you're going…

I guess I’m the only one who would find a tee shirt with Old C**t on the front and Old Coot on the back fun.

Probably not, but I'd leave it at home come the next PA System barbie. I can't imagine bing given a F2F ticking off by Deborah,…

Has anyone really done anything useful with sex and violence since Clockwork Orange ?

You mean in a movie, right, not 'in my spare time'?

There is a very cute little clip somewhere on youtube of a guy at last year's BDO, turning his tshirt right way out. He'd worn…

Let's just hope Karl Urban can manage 'I'm a doctor not a..." without disgracing himself

I'm assuming this kept the writers up nights. How do you top '..escalator'? I'd be phoning David Gerrold and asking what he wanted to use and wasn't allowed to.

I'm still nervous as hell though.…

T-shirts – In keeping with my strange youth, my mum came back…

One of the funniest things I heard at BDO was a conversation on the 2pm bus from Real Groovy to the venue. Two Kiwi males were explaining…

I think they probably did, as the two bands were originally scheduled at different times, until Tom Morello wanted more time between his acoustic set and the main Rage Against The Machine act. Or so I heard.

They should have just cancelled him. Hell, why did they even book him?…

Craig, the potty mouth obscures your interesting points.
You don't have to refer to genitalia or sex acts in every message ...

Every message? Putting that aside, chockasunday, I'll take the rebuke in the spirit in which it is offered.

Here's two things to contemplate.

If its any comfort, when…

Back to Gmail I guess

triple post..shit...someone fix please? This site seems particularly buggy right now?

Pages are slow to load for some reason. I'll ask the guys.

I AM PROUD TO BE THE OLDEST PERSON AT THIS EVENT

Also, for the hell of it, yet another punter clip during 'Pacifier':

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=ueIhjs3UpSM

I'm slightly troubled by the fact that there are moments there that other people remember and I don't.

I'm slightly troubled by the fact that no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get a plane into NZ until Saturday and missed what looked like the best BDO lineup for…

Did the organisers not realise the A. Fire and Battles were likely to have similar fans?

I think they probably did, as the two bands were originally scheduled at different times, until Tom Morello wanted more time between his acoustic set and the main Rage Against The Machine act. Or…

(although now and then it is funny)

Russell, I swear I saw a smile on your face and Mrs B. definitely gets my vote for best sing a long of the day with her support to Bill on "New England".

Same old problem with Bill though – if he would…

As a reformed goth I'm guessing that the 18-year old female in question was wearing a t-shirt honouring the terrible goth-metal/unintentional comedy act Cradle of Filth – 'Jesus Is A Ct' is a slogan of theirs.

the shirt could…

If they're really Labour funded then I think a demand for money back might be in order.

Actually, rich, I know quite a few Labour folks who think the party establishment are waaay too right. But that's a whole other sack full of squirming kittens I don't want to touch…

As a reformed goth I'm guessing that the 18-year old female in question was wearing a t-shirt honouring the terrible goth-metal/unintentional comedy act Cradle of Filth – 'Jesus Is A Ct' is a slogan of theirs.

the shirt could just be a 'god is a…

sometimes the word is not intended as a perjorative. one young woman I met wears a tattoo "niga c**t" on her arm, which for her doesnt imply a self esteem problem.

Interesting, ali, that you've read the room and think an asterisk-less 'cunt' might not go down well. Geoff might…

If they're really Labour funded then I think a demand for money back might be in order.

Quite. It seems fairly clear to me what happened, but the mob is convinced that it's evidence of sweeping corruption.

They promised me insights into the human condition and all I get is dyslexia.

I was joking. I alone have the godly power to re-edit my posts ...

__It is worth noting that nearly every piece of legislation protecting New Zealand workers, while supported by Labour, has actually been driven by the Alliance and the Greens. As the Alliance no longer exists I’d suggest voting Green…

You must be on drugs

They promised me insights into the human condition and all I get is dyslexia.

Bv)

Very gracious of you to describe me as a "level two troll", Russell.

In that you're eminently capable of useful contributions but frequently choose to be unpleasant.

No posts from the Standard today. Apparently they've been licking their wounds. Instead, one of its more obnoxious cheerleaders, had http://newzblog.wordpress.com/2008/01/21/pig-fucking/.

i'm sure you had "put"

You must be on drugs ;-)

FYI Russel that drug ad link has an extra " at the end.

It's weird: the formatting is correct, but the link doesn't work — it keep picking up the quote mark in the HTML as a character. The URL is, anyway:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2008/jan/18/advertising.drugsandalcohol

And the message looks to be that…

It was a jolly day – far too bloody hot of course (does it get hotter every year?!), but then I was one of those jammy gits enjoying the lush (read: air-conditioned) environs of the East Stand Lounge in between forays into the wild...

True story: the first words I…

I love how E guy is so not smiling, and acid girl has to be having a bad one.

The Guardian is utterly uncritical – just print the…

Highlight #1: Arcade Fire; watching the…

plastering their defiantly un PC politics across their heaving bosoms for public delectation. so naughty and sooo brave.

Yes. If they have a bosom. Context makes a difference tho' and I think the gender of the wearer may make a difference to "Get a fuck bitch."

Also kept a tally of the Most Offensive t-shirt. Saw a lumpy girl. around 18 years, wearing the slogan "Jesus is a ct". How do you begin to read that one??

you could start with young women's attitudes to their cts.
sometimes the word is not intended as a perjorative.…

Raymond, I'm not sure what you're on about. I doubt anyone who is actually a moderator on the standard would have said that. Feel free to provide a link and prove me wrong.

You're right. The comment is discussed here.

A person called Robert Owen/Robespierre says his son and/or his…

The amount of hoohah from right wingers suggests this Standard is causing them some grief?

Well, nanoplanet, I'd like to think sewer rats in the blogisphere would case some grief to anyone with a shred of decency and who thinks political blogs can be a useful and sane contribution to…

Do you have to be so ... lurid? :-)

'Fess up, Russell, you wouldn't have me any other way. Though I prefer, "disturbingly vivid turn of phrase" (true story – comment appended to one of my uni essays) myself. :-)

” you are a Short fat ugly Tory
unfortunately you can only change two of the above ”

He was banned from KB but it is amazing how often his claims of what the…

a young man wearing a shirt saying 'GET A FUCK BITCH'.

(Or is that a pop-cultural reference that I'm missing because I'm old?)

No. That's just plain offensive.

but The Standard has never taken the position that David is doing anything wrong on his blog.

That's not how kbb and The Standard have come across. You both have featured some very nasty personal attacks on DPF. That might just be one reason your comment threads aren't up to…

Also kept a tally of the Most Offensive t-shirt.

I have a worthy entry: a young man wearing a shirt saying 'GET A FUCK BITCH'.

(Or is that a pop-cultural reference that I'm missing because I'm old?)

I don't really want to get into this debate now, but The Standard has never taken the position that David is doing anything wrong on his blog.

Tane: Can you excuse me if I raise my eyebrow in a Spock-like manner, here. And can you please try and get your…

You might want to consider that, Tane. As they say in Boston, politics ain't beanbag — but the political blogisphere doesn't have to be Saw-style torture porn either.

Do you have to be so ... lurid? :-)

Which is better than the parent who turned up to my son's 4 year old birthday with a t-shirt which had "I fucked your boyfriend" on the front. Yup...

Eww... If that's not an occasion to put a parent on the naughty step for some serious time out, what is?…

It seems like everyone got out their phones for 'Pacifier' ...

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=hWxKseyE-k4

Arcade Fire, 'Wake Up':

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=-ulfT4ztDbQ

Rage doing 'Know Your Enemy':

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=0wGKBjS08Ts

Rage on Bush:

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=55O0DBt7YpE

Bjork's entrance:

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=SdZ9F0eFG1g

Lord of Lightning during Bjork:

http://nz.youtube.com/watch?v=HmX8sT8FSA0

Funny you say that Russell, we've actually just banned Dad for the second time (this time for life) for threatening other commenters, including myself (however jokingly, it's hard to tell with that guy sometimes).

I prefer not to take chances, especially after he's threatened to meet up and set me…

Also kept a tally of the Most Offensive t-shirt. Saw a lumpy girl. around 18 years, wearing the slogan "Jesus is a c**t". How do you begin to read that one??

My son and I went to see the Otago Volts play Canterbury Wizards in 20/20 cricket yesterday. There were…

Paul – this is exposing the links to the Nats which I voluntarily disclose in a prominent place on my blog?

I think you are being a bit disingenuous (sp?), David. They don't deny your links to the Nats, it is clearly the opinion of KBB & The Standard that your…

I was a little bemused to realise afterwards that most of my day's…

Yesterday, we saw the monster movie du jour: Cloverfield. I really liked it. The idea of capturing the entire narrative via one consumer video camera was perfectly executed (although that thing had some battery life …)

Well, I loved the headline on the NYTimes…

Also kept a tally of the Most Offensive t-shirt. Saw a lumpy girl. around 18 years,…

Funny you say that Russell, we've actually just banned Dad for the second time (this time for life) for threatening other commenters, including myself (however jokingly, it's hard to tell with that guy sometimes).

We have, unfortunately, attracted a lot of nasty…

a scumbag like Robin Maxwell

Sorry let's get the right scumbag: Ian Robert Maxwell born Ján Ludvík Hoch) — decorated war veteran, Labour MP, media mogul and all-round shit bag.

(And yes, I know defamation suits are mostly a waste of time and energy with little or no return, but one can dream...)

Ah, they can be a damn sight worse. One of the saddest things I saw David Lange say towards the end of his life was that he…

. I'd rather see the BDO vanish, to be honest. It brings huge numbers of great bands out here and totally wastes them by making the environment so unpleasant that it's near-impossible to enjoy what's good about most of them.

The problem with Dizzee Rascal was that there was a…

Man, that's a crapload of people in front of Shihad. I haven't been to a BDO since 1996, but I'm not sure if I would enjoyed such a press of humanity, or just felt sick and overwhelmed.

It's not the place for anyone who's uncomfortable with crowds.

But it could…

I certainly hope not, because it's complete and utter bullshit.

Just need a friendly lawyer and you can secure the kids' fincancial future with a defamation suit!

(And yes, I know defamation suits are mostly a waste of time and energy with little or no return, but one can dream...)

It is quite baffling to me how it happened, and I am 1000% happy for anyone from the PA crew to check the technical logs and reveal IP addresses, when the user logged in etc etc.

Oh God, there's no need for that. You have posted here more recently, but…

Oh man. Björk and band flew 40 hours to get there and people booed the encore? Classy!

I am incredibly glad that I missed that moment, having nipped off early for LCD Soundsystem. Cringe.

And off memory I have only twice posted about KBB, once…

Now before anyone asks, no I am not pretending to be Cameron, and…

Agreed. This stuff is doing my head in at the moment — it's not fun. I've just had to go and deny a confident claim from a Kiwiblog commenter that I'm a part of some ninth-floor-directed conspiracy to defame whaleoil by calling him a paedophile.

Oooh, I can top that…

Unfortunately the…

Maybe they'll do a small…

**NB: I'll leave this here because the following comments won't make any sense without it, but this post isn't actually by Whaleoil. It's David Farrar falling victim to some…

have a friend who in Oz who had that experience with PJ Harvey — caught her set, hated it, but couldn't quite get it out of her head.

Unfortunately I had a similar experience at the weekend. My kids were playing a Wiggles DVD and I haven't been able to…

Part of the problem is that both sides are preaching to the choir, I'd be surprised if either side wins any new converts, so shrill is their tone.

Agreed. This stuff is doing my head in at the moment — it's not fun. I've just had to go and deny…

After that, Bjork was intriguing and avant-garde, but not entirely what the Rage crowd wanted to hear.

I like Bjork, but have to admit she doesn't exactly make it easy — like Tori Amos (who I also adore – go figure) the line between utter genius and tooth-grinding pretension is…

Part of the problem…

In the end, it's the hypocrisy stupid. Because it takes precisely zero imagination to picture The Standard going up like a flaming bag of dogshit if Kiwiblog had an equally 'technical' connection with the National Party.

I agree, it's hypocritical, and that's precisely their problem.

But by Prentice's notably measured…

In itself, it's hardly a scandal, but The Standard has hammered David Farrar regularly for his National Party links, which often go undeclared when he's tapped as an "independent commentator" in the media.

Come on Russell, it's gotten a little more thrashing, screaming and outright pants-pooing than that. By the…

we got back home in pretty good time

I certainly have to give to props to the organisers – years of experience really seems to have nailed the logistical side of things. While I admittedly got there late and left just as Rage were ending, I was amazed that a…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWiI05m7i7I

Someone else's clip (also during 'Pacifier') of an "old dude going off to shihad". The Big Day Out is all about personal…