If your house is still solid and build under the old rules, will one market apply, & if you build/repair under these new rules will a second market with all the differernt risks…

Pomeroys was the first brewry in Canterbury and also the first union labour. Dux the old Canty Uni union & Warners, well doesn't lend itself to (British) unionists.

Warners had a few broken glasses,…

Don't be so mean. Your average guy is just a standard deviant. A mere Student. T anyone?

Must you regress to that sort of humour?

What about the lack of any statistical link for anal sex?

Bugger statistics.

Don't be so mean. Your average guy is just a standard deviant. A mere Student. T anyone?

Perhaps the calculation was a little simpler: It's impossible to employ anyone when there isn't actually any work because there's no fucking business.

Also, they'll probably be employing quite a few people over the next year or so to get the place back open, but checkout workers and shelf stockers…

Perhaps the calculation was a little simpler: It's impossible to employ anyone when there isn't actually any work because there's no fucking business.

They do also seem to have missed the bit where the workers get two months' full pay and an offer of work at other Foodstuffs supermarkts if…

Maybe you need a sturdier desk. Could come in handy to hide under when Bill English causes the next quake.

Nats fail to save jobs in quake zone

Written By: Marty G – Date published: 10:16 pm, September 9th, 2010 – 7 comments

Categories: business, class war, jobs, unemployment, wages – Tags: christchurch…

And I'm a smoker too. Ah well, thats me well and truly fucked.

No, not necessarily at all. Just like people who smoked heavily from childhood and never get cancer – there is a certain element of the luck of the draw. We can stack the odds by avoiding this…

Which person gets it, the giver, or the recipient?

I'll give you a clue: throat cancer.

It's too bad this information was published in David Wishart's Nutball Magazine, because it's true. Also HPV is not the only oral STD that is rapidly increasing, but it's the one we're discussing here.…

I'll give you a clue: throat cancer.

But what a headstone!

"Here lies the one they called Big Tex,
killed by to much oral sex"

OIC. Both. From oral HPV. Makes sense I guess.

We do, of course, have a good vaccine for that. One Wishart insists no one should take.

Important question though: if Investigate has reported the oral sex-throat cancer link, has it also reported the vaginal sex-throat cancer link? What about the lack of any statistical link for anal sex?

Okay, next question: is it men, or women, or both, to whom the risk applies?

IANAD. :)

See above link.

I'll give you a clue: throat cancer.

Okay, next question: is it men, or women, or both, to whom the risk applies?

I'm sure I'm not the first to note, over the past five days, that all of a sudden welfare's not a dirty word, huh?

I think crux is whether they can move from the quake situation being different because people need the support to that most supported before need it…

Which person gets it, the giver, or the recipient?

I'll give you a clue: throat cancer.

New England Journal of Medicine

Surely if you've got cancer, oral sex is going to be on your list of things before you die, so cancer causes oral sex?

Surely, even if you don't have cancer...

Well, if you replace "causes" with "is associated with a greater incidence of", it's actually true.

Which person gets it, the giver, or the recipient?

Mmmm... Little pie.

Well, if you replace "causes" with "is associated with a greater incidence of", it's actually true.

Surely if you've got cancer, oral sex is going to be on your list of things before you die, so cancer causes oral sex?

Instead, we have pointed an accusing finger at the unemployed.

I'm sure I'm not the first to note, over the past five days, that all of a sudden welfare's not a dirty word, huh?

Conrad Heine has written a good quake story for The Economist website

which features the already iconic photo of local lads cracking a pose

The victims of unemployment are equally innocent of responsibility for the calamity that has struck them.

They did not cause the recession. The numbers involved are just as large. The economic…

In other news, the new issue of Investigate magazine apparently says that oral sex gives you cancer.

Well, if you replace "causes" with "is associated with a greater incidence of", it's actually true.

The extent of the trauma suffered in and around Christchurch may take time to emerge fully however, and should not be underestimated.

This.

In other news, the new issue of Investigate magazine apparently says that oral sex gives you cancer.

Someone obviously never heard of J. Edgar Hoover...

__"We at the FBI regret to inform that we are unable to investigate matters of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate…

To whom? The giver or the recipient?

Both, but only if they're a) unmarried, b) gay, c) enjoying it, or d) some combination of the above.

I still have reservations about Local Authorities collecting payments and even more about them holding such funds

No one said anything about them holding the funds – just being a collection channel exactly the same as the insurance companies are now. Easy to arrange, and they are far from risky…

yours, a haemivorous vegetarian 8>)

"Mother of One" followed by "Egg Donor"

Good on you Bob Parker, your blood's worth bottling.
Sincerely,
Mrs. McWhirtus*
Wainoni

*Pronounced as McFoetus

Vote for Ghosrok

Not only will you be helping an up and coming producer…

At this rate they'll soon be taking the pulse of the Nation from women who've never flexed their ovaries at all.

It depends if it is an arithmetic sequence (where the next will be "Mother of None") or a geometric sequence (which would be "Mother of One" followed by "Egg…

To whom? The giver or the recipient?

the reader, if there's any justice

This sums it up for everyone I've been speaking too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DT-GLkATRTc

Years ago Televusion Noo Zild used to decide what was "good" for us by monitoring the letters from "Mother of Four", Whangarei.

Mother of Two, Bryndwr

At this rate they'll soon be taking the pulse of the Nation from women who've never flexed their ovaries at all.

Years ago Televusion Noo Zild used to decide what was "good" for us by monitoring the letters from "Mother of Four", Whangarei.

What's the problem with Mellow's Mum being a substitute eh?

What, right through their arse? In Parliament today there was definitely a push from Labour to help everyone, with mention from Goff that if the people of SCF could be bailed, then everyone in CHCH could be assisted with lost wages and support for their damaged homes.Good on Labour.

Who…

Ross, you're just not reading the Libertarianz right. You have to read them as comedy. They're gold.

It's all good now. I've had a wee dram.....happy again.....I'm home...

Right. Back to reality.

Interesting chat to my folks this evening. Quite happy with Mayor Bob and his handling of the situation…

On the upside, the new issue of Investigate magazine apparently proclaims that oral sex gives you cancer.

To whom? The giver or the recipient?

This may or may not be because the first comment reads:

"New Zealand under judgement?"

In other news, the new issue of Investigate magazine apparently says…

He would have been a good Auckland Mayor for all the reasons he's a bad Christchurch Mayor.

One or two axe-murderers and cat-stranglers by the looks of it.

Indeed. Whilst we are on that subject.
How about Bob "The Re-Builder" Parker with those, permanently "Rolled Up" sleeves?
I can hear the PR guy now "and roll those sleeves up when you're on camera Bob, it makes you…

One or two axe-murderers and cat-stranglers by the looks of it.

The response to the disaster in Christchurch is a lesson in what the state can achieve when it acts in the interests of vulnerable communities, and draws…

What an arsehole.

Ross, you're just not reading the Libertarianz right. You have to read them as comedy. They're gold.

And he is a Doctor!!! Of medicine!

And he pledged fifty dollars! Oh his own money! The man's generosity knows no bounds!

Fifty dollars, wow. The eyes of Cantabrian children will be sparkling tonight. Who has ever even seen fifty dollars...

And he is a Doctor!!! Of medicine!

Along with Dr Crippen.

That individuals should be left free to make their own choices in life, but should be held responsible for the consequences of their actions .

That people are essentially benevolent, and that charity is a virtue.

That the government is there…

Like hell.

How can this prick sleep at night?

He has never been to a public hospital???…

Oh, it happened! A press release from people who really should be allowed to just keep on talking.

What, right through their arse? In Parliament today there was definitely a push from Labour to help everyone, with mention from Goff that if the people of SCF could be bailed, then…

http://www.geonet.org.nz/earthquake/quakes/3368099g.html

Sure, it's tiny, but some of us have been feeling left out.

A woman on the radio yesterday opined that the Te Papa earthquake simulator was nothing like the real thing, which was much, much more violent.

It's a while since I'd been in that simulator, but personally I was glad I had. The real one wasn't so frightening when you knew…

Given that those who needed it most didn't have electricity, I'm guessing they were glued to their battery radios anyway

That's true, of course. It's just that the tone seemed a bit tailored for the rest of us, rather than the locals.

Islander,
Sorry, yes; Canterbury.

I dumped it in the other post as well.

Probably not a good time to indulge in such spats but acknowledge that…

I'd thought a trident was the weapon of choice for resolving television news vendettas, but hey, whatever works.

A trident is just a pitchfork that has yet to see hay.

> I heard it floats.

Yeah that's the way I understood it was meant to work. Essentially the building is on a large slab that should float on the "liquified" subsoil. With the dampers the building shouldn't move too much and shouldn't settle much either.

Friend of mine once convinced…

I think *Canterbury* residents would've appreciated just a wee bit more coverage of other areas -e.g beach areas, like Waikuku, Woodend, & Amberly* as well as – yes! definitely much more CD info...

It would be a hard call to send one of your handful of crews to all those places…

(*That's not only because one – and maybe 2 – of my family have had major damage to…

You want to join me with pitchforks? I'm back again for a bit this summer.

I'd thought a trident was the weapon of choice for resolving television news vendettas, but hey, whatever works.

Chch residents though, I imagine, would've prefered more Civil Defense information – perhaps on every hour and half-hour – and less V/T of smashed buildings.

Given that those who needed it most didn't have electricity, I'm guessing they were glued to their battery radios anyway. There was a certain irony…

TVNZ ['s Saturday] coverage

I think they did pretty well under difficult circumstances (at least, better than I'd feared). Chch residents though, I imagine, would've prefered more Civil Defense information – perhaps on every hour and half-hour – and less V/T of smashed buildings.

Maybe that's because they're so constantly underwhelming, but their function in the morning honestly just seemed to be distracting from the far more useful and insightful radio coverage.

Which went back to the scheduled Saturday Morning With Kim Hill at about 10.30, didn't it?

I know Mark Cubey, Kim's producer,…

Speaking of Te Papa if the big one comes during opening hours chances are somebody will be inside the earthquake simulator and won't they be just so impressed at how realistic it is?

A woman on the radio yesterday opined that the Te Papa earthquake simulator was nothing like the…

Yes, it must be my personal vendetta with the broadcaster. What other explanation could there be?

You want to join me with pitchforks? I'm back again for a bit this summer.

Bitching about TVNZ coverage seems a bit rote to me, to be hones

Maybe that's because they're so constantly underwhelming, but their function in the morning honestly just seemed to be distracting from the far more useful and insightful radio coverage. The extended six o'clock news at night had much…

Has anyone else noticed the mysterious absence of ACT and Rodney Hide from any media coverage related to the quake?

I suspect they don't know it has happened yet. They need to keep checking each others back. So they are in a neverending 5 person conga line.

"I'm in the…

Standard piles will just sink instantly but houses built on slabs should float.

There's been a lot of liquefaction around here, with the occasional pile sinking. The two structures built on modern high(ish)-tech slabs, though, while still afloat, are badly cracked and buckled

But it's got super-shock-absorbers. So it will lie intact under the sand and the sea.)

I heard it floats.

Yeah that's the way I understood it was meant to work. Essentially the building is on a large slab that should float on the "liquified" subsoil. With the dampers the building…

Hignurant I was to this new word: miturate.

Alas I couldn't find it in te dictionary but I did find micturate.

Ah yes of course – one c short of a pee. I blame the quake induced stress and sleep deprivation.

Kind of begs the question why the coverage by Radio NZ murdered the coverage on TV One

Don't know about anyone else, but on Saturday I generally don't turn on the television until the evening. The radio-alarm turns itself on at 6.30, and then the stereo goes on when I…

"a US *NAVEL* ship??? Attached to a mother-line? Or lacking any cord and just a big skincoloured...thang?

Sam F – thank you for posting these paranoid ravings!
They are a little excursion into FantasyLand (a horrid fantasy, to…

@Giovanni – Oh well, I've heard enough of your opinions on TVNZ before to assume the chance of you ever being pleased aren't great.

Yes, it must be my personal vendetta with the broadcaster. What other explanation could there be?

Craig Y

The maps are available at http://www.gw.govt.nz/Earthquake-hazard-maps/ if anyone's curious

My house looks like it straddles the line between a reassuring blue 'low risk' area and a bright red 'high risk' zone.

I'm unsure if that means he will see us through a world war, or if he'll get shot and die way too young.

Until he's sent a SOS by coconut, I say the comparison is meaningless.

Oh George, don't be silly.

You know that HAARP caused the earthquake.

Those comments...

Eyes are everywhere on this one Nina – the skies are blanketed in the metal filth again. I have more photos of the disgusting dawn, Pink glowing crap everywhere – which has become quiet ‘normal’.

The…

In what sense was it murdered, Giovanni? Just asking, I didn't hear the RNZ coverage.

Where to begin to compare them? It was just a better operation all round. More lively, more informative, better conducted. TVNZ's thing was like watching Italian and indeed possibly New Zealand television twenty years ago,…

Hignurant I was to this new word: miturate.

Alas I couldn't find it in te dictionary but I did find micturate.

"A desire to urinate". I am sure there've been a few damp patches over the weekend.

Thank you.

Hmmm....And down the page meaning.....umm.....I now(!) presume that this…

I saw the quake get downgraded on TVNZ somewhere around 9am or so, can't remember exactly. Again, I don't know when RNZ did it.

I have no doubt RNZ did a great job.

If I read the Wellington earthquake maps correctly some years ago, Te Papa is built on the area at highest risk for liquefaction.

The maps are available at http://www.gw.govt.nz/Earthquake-hazard-maps/ if anyone's curious. The humdinger is the combined map – the take-home from that is that in a big earthquake, you…

Yeah, funny how that works with rolling coverage. People wake up and turn on at different times. It pays to repeat stuff. Otherwise it's like tuning in halfway through one of those long RNZ interviews where after listening for 15minutes they don't bother saying who it was... :)

Kind of…

Save your creeks. Mitigate mitigate mitigate

Or just hold the hard (b)logs and miturate miturate miturate (hat tip to Ivor Cutler)

(new to this game hope I got the quoting process right and that my toilet humour isn't too base)

Lyttleton tunnel apparently closed by smoke – it aint over…

As for Mark Jennings:

"TVNZ just had the same stuff repeated, repeated, repeated."

In response to this, I guess.

20:45 Mike McRoberts:

@nztv @rachsmalley actually what it reflects is a poor decision by 3 not to go with continuous coverage throughout the day. No lead in.

21:12 Rachel Smalley:

@MrMikeMcRoberts…

As for Mark Jennings:

"TVNZ just had the same stuff repeated, repeated,…

If I read the Wellington earthquake maps correctly some years ago, Te Papa is built on the area at highest risk for liquefaction. (And tsunami. And shaking. But it's got super-shock-absorbers. So it will lie intact under the sand and the sea.)

I heard it floats.

Rawdon Christie who fronted…

Did I hear Bob Parker say on morning report this morning that it was alright to flush your toilet now, even though with broken sewers a lot of the product was likely to end up in the rivers?

Um..yes he did....

We s'pose he can shit where he likes. He…

As for the HOS front cover, I'm not surprised. Just disappointed.

I'm told by someone senior at the Star Times that, by contrast, they were very focused on tone — to the extent of removing the word "hell" from a p3 headline before going to press.

Can I just acknowledge how impressed and proud I was of TVNZ's coverage on the weekend. Particularly Rawdon Christie who fronted the rolling coverage like a pro, and reporter Joy Reid who offered calm,…

Leighton Smith this morning compared Mayor Bob to Churchill and JFK. I shit you not.

A drunk and a serial shagger? (See Herald on Sunday exclusive ...)

Leighton Smith this morning compared Mayor Bob to Churchill and JFK. I shit you not.

I'm unsure if that means he will see us through a world war, or if he'll get shot and die way too young.

I hope that the fact that there are people owing their lives to red tape won't get lost in all this.

and Gaffer Tape too...

but, yes stricter building codes have been a lifesaver for many – but that's down to processes not individuals...

though whoever signed off on building…

Next we'll be seeing Roodney in to advise.

Yeah right – on how the free market would have furnished us with excellent building codes?

Leighton Smith this morning compared Mayor Bob to Churchill and JFK. I shit you not.

…

some people here are getting worried about Bob's orchestration of this opportunity that has landed in his lap

Leighton Smith this morning compared Mayor Bob to Churchill and JFK. I shit you not.

You know that HAARP caused the earthquake.

Hehe!:

About Clare Swinney
I wrote for Investigate Magazine from 2000-2005, then switched to the alternative media when I became aware of the rise of fascism that was

Pippa was covering up by saying it's a joke, but if his mind turns that way it indicates and underlying selfishness and self-centreness.
Selfish, vain, silly and vile.

I hear that the weather bloke also insulted some poor kid – who had said he hadn't had a shower since Friday…

With no mains water it's handy having the river so close, you can fetch a bucketful to flush your toilet.

Did I hear Bob Parker say on morning report this morning that it was alright to flush your toilet now, even though with broken sewers a lot of the product…

Agreed, all round – though some mentioned our friend Paul Henry striking a bum note.

That man gets worse. He was standing in front of the jewellers yesterday and speculating about looting diamonds from the rubble, and today he was talking about how handy a gun would be so you…

Kelvin Berryman on Nine-to-Noon – excellent job on communicating the seismic-geological context, and the degree of uncertainty there must be in how the…

I don't know whether or not to thank Danyl for drawing attention to this hairball of WTF-ness from Com-Post political editor Tracy Watkins.

LOL! The most interesting thing about that story are all the comments telling her to STFU and let the authorities focus on actually helping. Strangely sane comments.

Could go on a tee-shirt.
Joe Wylie again?

While I know that's intended as some kind of compliment, I must point out that I've long since been obsoleted by this sort of cheap gadget.

Meanwhile there's an army truck outside, and Avonside Drive is swarming with shovel-wielding soldiers.

Actually, it…

I think an image of Craig and Whaleoil moving in elevated and more elevated blue circles has the potential for a great artwork. Could go on a tee-shirt.

Screw off – T-shirts are for hair metal bands and Hello Kitty. One would look uncommonly fine in one of Ford Madox…

...first the EQ and now Gerry Brownlee.

And not a mine in sight!!!!
He REALLY sounded keen on on the job on RNZ this morning.

uncharitably, one might say he was mining a disaster...

HAHA Its some crap bands fault! So some believe.

Feelers – Antennae – Aha! it's the…

Joe Wylie again? No need to set it to music though.

You know that HAARP caused the earthquake.

Was most disappointed to find that HAARP isn't the noise you make after a particularly vicious night on the turps. (Google breaks my heart, again.) The thought of piss-heads bringing down a city through the morphic resonance of simultaneous power-chundering... that's a proper…

l'm hattipping @BR3NDA for alerting me to the most bizarre thing to come from the quake so far.

Oh George, don't be silly.

You know that HAARP caused the earthquake.

KNOWN FACTS
It Is TECHnICALLY PoSSIBLE tO PRODUCE AuDio AT DeSTRUCTIVE FREqUENCIes (LEigh/MckeNZIe '01)*
DawS0N/KuLESChOV Had ALrEADY TEsTED SuCH DEViCES fOR THE RePTILIANs AND Had BeEN LINKED to PARKER's CLONE-sLAVES.
JaMES ReID HaD KnOWLEDGE oF PARKER THrOUGH SCoUT1NG CONNECTIONs*
ThE FeELERs =
20 T0P 20 hits *
4 #1 albums…

Anyway, Mr. Lyth, I stand by my view that the phantom gaffe only served to make Jim Anderton look endearingly human. Who the hell hasn't said things that, with the benefit of hindsight, make you cringe?

I do think it created a narrative that wasn't at all helpful to Anderton,…

We actually deserve the Government response to a major natural disaster to be slightly more considered than Ms. Watkins appears to want. I'd also think nobody affected wants — or could use — an ad hoc response scribbled on the back of a press release on Sunday afternoon.

It never…

My heart goes out to those people in Chch – first the EQ and now Gerry Brownlee.

And not a mine in sight!!!! He REALLY sounded keen on on the job on RNZ this morning.

Canterbury Earthquake is now mentioning how to make a bog. First mention was Monday 12-30pm.

Still nothing on the National CD Page searching for "Toilet".

Will contact CD today and see why.

Is it a coincidence that the name "Brownlee" rhymes with the word "flee"?
I think not.

For a vicious smear, I've got to say it was piss-weak from the start…

One last thing: I know plenty of Labour Party folks.…

sorry Craig, you and teh Natz don't get off that easily. You've enjoyed the association too much. Some of us still remember that gorgeous (dahling) photo of the man with Melissa and John last year. You lie down with a dog, don't moan about fleas.

I'd like to have you…

Slater is clearly not regarded as enough of an embarrassment by those who determine whose views get broadcast.

Which is something you might want to take up with whoever is pretending to edit The Herald nowadays, but please leave the National Party out of that pathology.

sorry Craig, you and…

I struggle to imagine that the 100,000 figure is likely.

And Lilith, I am too far away to know the true number either. Yes, tens of thousands will have had minor damage. The media focus, as is their job, on the media-worthy such as Bexley and Seabreeze Close.

There are…

their conduct has been so squeaky clean you could eat off it

Agreed, all round – though some mentioned our friend Paul Henry striking a bum note. Maybe he and the entitled Ms Watkins have been to the same charm school.

Thanks, George. Extraordinary website.

Mind you, I loved the "Possible Connections of Significance" between a "Chimp with Down-Syndrome" and John Campbell. Have to admit, the photos of the two were pretty similar.

This is how we judge our governments; not by how they perform in the good times, but by how they look after our communities and serve the…

Slater is clearly not regarded as enough of an embarrassment by those who determine whose views get broadcast.

Which is something you might want to take up with whoever is pretending to edit The Herald nowadays, but please leave the National Party out of that pathology.

Anyway, it's just gone…

BoB PaRKeR ENGiNEeREd tHE CHRiStCHURCH QuAKES – THe TRUTH BeHIND THE CaNTERBURY EaRTHQuAKeS OF 4/9/10

Sacha: With all due disrespect, I move in slightly more elevated "blue circles" than you do, and Slater is regarded as a rather sad embarrassment.

Slater is clearly not regarded as enough of an embarrassment by those who determine whose views get broadcast. And I'm talking the Ak establshment, not…

Whoever was responsible for that setup needs a bit of a talking to, those shelves should have been anchored but unfortunately they rarely are.

I'm not sure why the university library, by the look of the photos, only braced some of the shelving and not all of it? The shelves…