Field Theory by Hadyn Green

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Field Theory: Gruts

58 Responses

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  • Steve Barnes, in reply to Ross Mason,

    (My Dad told me to dress to the left)

    Sinister...
    Not really as "Dressing" on the left is a right handed thing, tucking,.. as you understand...

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha, in reply to Hadyn Green,

    I didn't realise that if I selected text in someone's comment and pressed "reply", it would autoquote the selection

    One of my fave features

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19740 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Sacha,

    And thank you, Sacha, for making this feature known to a lot of us, months ago-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Steve Barnes,

    One of the weirder things I learned as a member of the Indecent Publications Tribunal was that a 'Prince Albert' was a penile piercing to keep your member tidy & contained to the left - reguardless of what you saw etc..

    O my! The sacrifices the royals went to etc. etc. etc.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Lucy Stewart, in reply to Islander,

    ne of the weirder things I learned as a member of the Indecent Publications Tribunal was that a 'Prince Albert' was a penile piercing to keep your member tidy & contained to the left - reguardless of what you saw etc..

    O my! The sacrifices the royals went to etc. etc. etc.

    That sounds suspiciously urbanly mythological. How reliable was the source?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    I can see you had a ball writing this...

    After weeding out the final pair, I noticed the trend, they were all Bendon.

    Who to blame?
    Who owns Bendon?
    Cullen Investments Limited, an international private investment company founded by entrepreneur Eric Watson.
    (You'd think they'd be more future savvy with a William Gibson on the Exec!)

    Dextrussed?

    Sinister… Not really as “Dressing” on the left is a right handed thing...

    so there's a lot of dexterous-dicks out there...

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7950 posts Report Reply

  • Joanna,

    Fuck the haters (who perhaps don't have a tummy they'd like to keep a little more secure), thunderpants for life. Except they're expensive and don't come in artichoke anymore. And they're not ruffled. Oh what I'd do for some ruffled panties in my size that didn't expect me to have an American booty.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 746 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Comfort wise, I have to say that commando beats all. It's the hygiene aspect that's challenged. Even then, it's called commando for a reason, soldiers in hot climates found underwear to cause higher rates of various problems. Admittedly, soldiers in the jungle don't usually have a nice drawer full of clean, dry undies.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder, in reply to Lucy Stewart,

    That sounds suspiciously urbanly mythological. How reliable was the source?

    Not reliable at all, in this case. The original info was from a pamphlet written during the early days of the Gauntlet piercing studio in SF; most people now think that the purported historical contexts for various piercings was made up from whole cloth. There is, for example, little or no historical evidence that Roman soldiers often had pierced nipples (another assertion in the same pamphlet).

    Comfort wise, I have to say that commando beats all.

    I can't say I've found that. On the occasions when I've had to go commando, I've usually found out the hard way that the crotch seams of men's dress trousers is prone to intimate chafing.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 708 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Lucy Stewart,

    As I recall*, it was in
    a)a scholarly dictionary of sexual terms (which the tribunal agreed should never
    have been submitted) with an 1880s useage date, and
    b)PFIQ mentioned the term several times, they being interested in such matters,
    as having been in use before the 20th century.

    *my stint on the IPT was in the late1980s/early1990s...

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Geoff Lealand, in reply to JackElder,

    I’ve usually found out the hard way that the crotch seams of men’s dress trousers is prone to intimate chafing.

    Plus the very real danger with zips!

    Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2560 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Semmens, in reply to Stephen Judd,

    Surely the mark of a true gentleman is that he can discuss *anything* with propriety, delicacy, accuracy and tact.

    My rule of thumb is never discuss in public an item of male apparel that you wouldn't discuss with a random dude standing next to you at the urinal of a pub in the case of an embarassing accidental eye contact. "Nice hat" always works. Hats are implicitly cool and involve a safe upward gaze. I suggest saying "I like your undies" would bring an instant hush to the lavatory. Tee shirts are OK if they uber-cool. English laundry wearers always appreciate feedback on their fine taste.

    Otherwise, it is totally gay talk.

    Sevilla, Espana • Since Nov 2006 • 2217 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    Who to blame?
    Who owns Bendon?

    I've found MacPherson Men to be quite comfortable compared to many other brands. Maybe it's Elle having a hand in your undies that makes up for the normal Bendon mediocrity.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart, in reply to Tom Semmens,

    Otherwise, it is totally gay talk.

    Tom, I'm just going to assume you've never had a conversation with a Gay-er.

    Also, knit boxers on men? Lovely. Wait, does that make me gay?

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Geoff Lealand, in reply to recordari,

    Maybe it’s Elle having a hand in your undies

    Elle had a hand in my undies and I never noticed!!! Was I drugged or unconscious or something??

    Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2560 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    Otherwise, it is totally gay talk.

    Way to nose dive your post near the end.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to recordari,

    What's on Nickers...

    Maybe it’s Elle having a hand in your undies that makes up for the normal Bendon mediocrity.

    ...do ya think they go to Elle in a handbasket?
    or would ya, quick as a flash, swap Elle for leather?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7950 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson, in reply to JackElder,

    I can't say I've found that. On the occasions when I've had to go commando, I've usually found out the hard way that the crotch seams of men's dress trousers is prone to intimate chafing.

    All right, except on a bike. On a bike, I'll concede that undies all over your whole body is the most comfortable.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    I suggest saying "I like your undies" would bring an instant hush to the lavatory.

    "I like your hat" would do the same. In fact, if they were circumcised, they might think you were mocking them.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    swap Elle for leather?

    Ya' see, what this thread needed was more puerile, juvenile, penile protrusions. Far too circumscribed for a post-headed 'gruts'.

    SWIDT?

    Surely the mark of a true gentleman is that he can discuss *anything* with propriety, delicacy, accuracy and tact.

    Balls!

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Thunderpants are Teh Awesome as are Fanny Adams (which are kind of like thunderpants' sensible aunt). I prefer undies I don't have to continually fish out of my butt-crack. Fashionableness is not an issue for anything I intend to wear longer than 10 minutes.

    I've had some pretty nasty thigh-chaffing from the seams in my jeans I would hate to risk exposing myself to more of that in worse places by going commando.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report Reply

  • Nat Websta,

    My hubby has recently found a NZ made brand of undies called Milk. They're on teh interwebs here. He reckons they're the most comfy undies he's owned in recent times, and he loves them way more than his Bendon ones, most of which he has damned as uncomfortable. Particularly the bamboo fabric kind. I bought those for him thinking that they'd be uber comfy with the nice soft fabric, but apparently they were just chronic up-butt-bunchers.

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 23 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Hosking, in reply to Stephen Judd,

    Surely the mark of a true gentleman is that he can discuss *anything* with propriety, delicacy, accuracy and tact.

    Nah, fuck that.

    Delighted to see this discussion of burning questions of the day...

    First question I have is : 'Gruts' or 'Grunds' ?? I'd never heard the term 'gruts' until my mid 20s, but 'grunds' and 'grundies' was the norm since about the age of eight.

    And 'gruts' I first heard from a Pommie tramper.

    I'm not too hung up about the different brands but I find anything that isn't entirely or mostly cotton rather uncomfortable.

    And even the cotton ones....a bit uncomfortable. Wrote about this before...
    http://hosking.blogspot.com/2008/05/not-always-good-fit.html

    South Roseneath • Since Nov 2006 • 830 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Rob Hosking,

    'grunds/grundies' is the term I'm more aware of, since about the late 1970s. I've only read 'gruts' in UK fiction.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Nat Websta,

    chronic up-butt-bunchers.

    A nation squirms and adjusts their pants.

    Carry on.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

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