Southerly by David Haywood

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Southerly: Since You Asked

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  • Sacha,

    I can so hear that as a radio play. Bravo, David

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    Gasp!! I take it back about the cups of tea. This story is SO much more brutal and vicious than the previous light-hearted tale of robbery and casual violence.

    My carefully repressed five years in Chch is flooding back, in an insidiously unstoppable and well-mannered way, like the Avon after a particularly unCantabrian bout of rain, or a First Four Ships matron sweeping into Ballantynes* to purchase Christmas ornaments, school uniforms, and a Portmeirion cruet to replace the one broken by a visitor from Upper Hutt.

    *One of the first four shops.

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    Actually, I read this not so much ROFL as SWWST (snickering wickedly while sipping tea). Very Rosamond Lehmann, somehow. Very nice. Maybe put a riverine skinny-dip in the sequel, just for me? It might bookend the fist-fight quite nicely.

    Gas cooker. Chortle.

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    Fascinatingly abbreviated history of Ballantynes on the corporate website. Down the memory hole with their main claim to a spot in the history books...

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Megan Wegan,

    Oh! Jolisa, but I love Ballantynes. So pretty, so many gorgeous things, including the new Contemporary Lounge, with the makeup and the clothes, and oh, the bags. So many fond memories if getting school uniforms and buying birthday presents. I wish I hadn't cut up my ballantynes card.

    No, I don't work there, though I once did. And even that didn't put me off it.

    There is much I wish to disown about the city of my birth. But if I could transplant Ballys for Kirks*, I would be a happy happy girl.

    Well, and all the people I love down there.

    I just completely outed myself of being of the upturned collar persuasion, didn't I. Fine! I once owned an Aertex. And chunky silver jewellery. And went out with a College boy. AND a STAC boy.

    * Kirks being a poor second cousin of Ballantynes. Cramped and dark and the staff are awful. If MAC wasn't located there, I would never go.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report

  • Ben Austin,

    Great story. For a moment I was transported from the muggy Edwardian streets of London to the muggy Canterbury plains

    London • Since Nov 2006 • 1027 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    No offence intended, Megan. I love a big old department store, myself. I'm still smarting from the loss of big Farmers in Auckland (Hector, we hardly knew ye!), and La Samaritaine in Paris, and the perversely minimalist NYC outpost of Takashimaya...

    (My departmentstorophilia was both stoked and soothed by being allowed to participate in constructing this beauty last week, which had been lovingly saved up for since before Christmas).

    If MAC wasn't located there, I would never go.

    I came for the MAC, I stayed for the bra fitting department, and the occasional Portmeirion coffee mug...

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    Also: my nana used to work at Ballantynes, in the tailoring dept. She had left before the fire, but was devastated talking about it, even decades later.

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Jolisa,

    I just completely outed myself of being of the upturned collar persuasion, didn't I. Fine! I once owned an Aertex. And chunky silver jewellery.

    Pink Aertex? Fob chain? Respect!

    Auckland, NZ • Since Nov 2006 • 1472 posts Report

  • Megan Wegan,

    (My departmentstorophilia was both stoked and soothed by being allowed to participate in constructing this beauty last week, which had been lovingly saved up for since before Christmas).

    Love!

    Pink Aertex? Fob chain? Respect!

    Pink? Pfft. Far too avant-garde. Navy blue and burgundy, I'll have you know. I can't remember if I actually had a fob chain, but definitely something fob chain adjacent.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report

  • David Haywood,

    I'm just working on a longer reply, but in the meantime a question for Megan Wegan RE:

    I just completely outed myself of being of the upturned collar persuasion...

    Can you comment on the wider history of this phenomenon? When I first moved to Christchurch (in 1995), I remember seeing a woman in Merrivale and thinking: "Oh, she's forgotten to put her collar down. How embarrassing for her -- should I say something?" And then the next woman walking down the street was the same, and then the next, until I realized that it must be the fashion.

    But I never remember seeing this in Auckland or Wellington. Was it purely a local Canterbury fashion? Or would I have seen it in the rural(ish) parts of the home counties -- along with green wellingtons and range rovers.

    Dunsandel • Since Nov 2006 • 1156 posts Report

  • David Haywood,

    Creon Upton wrote:

    You regard your readership as an ignorant lot, David?

    Oh, not at all (and sorry, Kyle, if it came across that way). I just meant that I'd had some confused emails on this line, and wondered if I'd been too obscure. Apologies for any inadvertent offence -- none intended, I assure you!

    Ironically, though, the non-fictional Sarah did leave me in the lurch one night back in 1991...

    This is fully in accordance with my scientific investigations that established the Laws of Doctor Creon (LDC):

    1LDC: Everybody knows Dr Creon.

    2LDC: Cherchez la femme.

    Anyway, a fine story, Dr Controversy. Keep them coming.

    Thanks, dude!

    Dunsandel • Since Nov 2006 • 1156 posts Report

  • Hilary Stace,

    My father was called Nigel and went to Christs College. I could take offence.

    Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 3229 posts Report

  • Sacha,

    Or one of them wrought iron gates

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Emma Hart,

    Or would I have seen it in the rural(ish) parts of the home counties -- along with green wellingtons and range rovers.

    Yeah... I have a very fuzzy memory of my mother dressing as, basically, a Merivale Matron for a play, which must have been late eighties. A beige shirt with a stand-up collar, under a v-neck dark-coloured thin wool jumper, optional knotted pearls.

    But it's a look I associate with the local squattocracy (well, alright, I mean Fiona Elworthy), and the bottom half of the outfit is well-cut moleskins and gumboots. An outfit suitable for the kind of farming that involves a range rover, and occasionally getting out and looking at animals.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Megan Wegan,

    David, a quick survey of the office tells me it happens in lots of rural places.

    I asked my mum, who has lived in Canterbury her whole life, and she said she remembers it starting in the '60s, and it was known as a Merivale thing, and a "country wife comes to town" thing.

    She says "when you look at those rural stores, like Wrightsons and Pynes (PGG), that's what they sell. Aertexes and moleskins and things."

    And she points out that it is warmer, having your collar up. She's a good mum.

    For me, as a boarder at a Christchurch private school, it was just what we did. I did rebel eventually. I moved to linen shirts.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report

  • David Haywood,

    RE: Upper Hutt

    chris wrote:

    It confounded the stereotypical Upper Hutt missive beautifully.

    Ross Mason wrote:

    Bastard!

    I should perhaps mention that Jennifer is from Upper Hutt -- so just a little in-joke for her there.

    Raymond A Francis wrote:

    I didn't realise you had met my Chch based sisters David!

    Boy, are you ever in trouble if your sisters read this discussion thread (briefly contemplates blackmail)...

    Jolisa wrote:

    My carefully repressed five years in Chch is flooding back, in an insidiously unstoppable and well-mannered way, like the Avon after a particularly unCantabrian bout of rain, or a First Four Ships matron sweeping into Ballantynes...

    So sorry about that, Jolisa. If only you were back in NZ then the ACC might be able to help with the cost of your counselling! I have sympathy.

    Very Rosamond Lehmann, somehow. Very nice. Maybe put a riverine skinny-dip in the sequel, just for me?

    Unlike, Jane Austen, whose praises I may have sung to Dr Creon on one or two occasions, I can disclaim any influence from Rosamond Lehmann since I have not only never read her, but I have also never heard of her. But I shall now look her up.

    I have another similar-ish story at first-draft stage, which did feature a skinny dip until I decided to change it from summer to winter. But maybe I shall have to go back and use the UNDO button. I shall do my best to cater to your 'literary' needs (do you prefer men or women? I had one of each before).

    By the way, Kathryn Ryan singled out your (and Giovanni Tiso's) comments on the cycle helmet legislation as being very sensible and she "completely agreed with them". All the literary Ph.D.s ganging up on me...

    Dunsandel • Since Nov 2006 • 1156 posts Report

  • andin,

    it is warmer, having your collar up.

    Cause bobbed hair styles or carefully coiffed back buns are all the rage/de riguer?
    I dont know just asking. I just can't imagine flowing locks being anything that one would be seen in public wearing.
    Hah, makes hair sound like an optional extra.

    raglan • Since Mar 2007 • 1891 posts Report

  • Raymond A Francis,

    I always thought the stand-up collar had something to do with schools where only some people (1st11 etc) could wear their clothes in certain ways, how this moved to women of a certain age I cannot imagine
    I do have report that I do on occasions wear my collar in this manner because quite frankly it does keep the sun off your neck, heaven forbid that someone might think that I was a redneck

    45' South • Since Nov 2006 • 578 posts Report

  • David Haywood,

    RE: turned-up collars

    Megan Wegan wrote:

    I asked my mum, who has lived in Canterbury her whole life, and she said she remembers it starting in the '60s, and it was known as a Merivale thing, and a "country wife comes to town" thing.

    Thanks, matey! Important background information for yet another story in progress...

    Dunsandel • Since Nov 2006 • 1156 posts Report

  • Megan Wegan,

    Cause bobbed hair styles or carefully coiffed back buns are all the rage/de riguer?
    I dont know just asking. I just can't imagine flowing locks being anything that one would be seen in public wearing.

    Darn tooting. A low bun is acceptable, but yes, the streaked blonde crisp bob is really the gold standard.

    (I am being so mean to these women. I'm really very fond of some of them.)

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report

  • Hilary Stace,

    Blonde bobs, turned up collars, maybe chunky pearls - I thought that was a Khandallah Wadestown sort of thing that you learnt at private girls' schools. The junior version is a blonde pony tail.

    Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 3229 posts Report

  • Stewart,

    I have my own skinny-dipping story which involves late-night drunkenness; a small island far, far away; 2 males and a female; and a hasty departure occasioned by the sound of sirens* in the night.


    * Of the police-car variety rather than the 'luring mariners to their deaths' type.

    Te Ika A Maui - Whakatane… • Since Oct 2008 • 577 posts Report

  • Kyle Matthews,

    Oh, not at all (and sorry, Kyle, if it came across that way).

    I'll quite happily concede that I'm ignorant about many things, the lives of poets being near the top of the list. I am however skilled at finding things out, so I guess I've got that "lifelong learning" thing going on.

    So sorry about that, Jolisa. If only you were back in NZ then the ACC might be able to help with the cost of your counselling!

    If they don't pay for counselling for rape victims, I'm hoping that the budget doesn't stretch to "used to live in Chch trauma". That would be a messed up set of priorities.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report

  • Grace Dalley,

    Um, this is just a theory, but I always thought the collar-turned-up mode was so you could wear your pretty silk scarf and/or rope of pearls with a blouse without everything getting jumbled up at the neck. And you can put a jacket over the top as required without having to decide whether you wear the blouse collar over the jacket or under.*


    *disclaimer: I haven't worn my collar up since the 80s, when everybody did it.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2008 • 138 posts Report

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