Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: Celebrity Gibberish

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  • Sacha,

    gettin' all Tiso on yer ass

    Beats miso.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19707 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I got curious and had a look on GoogleEarth. Has anybody got any idea why they built that Loop road to nowhere?

    Well, it goes to the port. It's the route the sheep trucks take. When I was four I rode down it on Toddles, my giraffe.

    The police came and made me go home. Not for the last time.

    But why they built it as a loop, and part of a 900m State Highway, I don't know.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie,

    When I was four I rode down it on Toddles, my giraffe.

    Hey, respect! And here was me thinking that Alan Gibbs started this whole privately owned giraffe thing. You've certainly been pushing back the envelope from an early age.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Yamis,

    LB:

    "Would be a far better use of everyone’s time than getting the accountant to dig ditches badly for 200 hours?"

    If an accountant is digging ditches I'm sure they can charge people money to sit round watching in deck chairs, with a few beers and recoup the money owing pretty quickly.

    Since Nov 2006 • 903 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    But why they built it as a loop, and part of a 900m State Highway, I don't know.

    When I see things like that I think "Questions need to be asked" but I guess it was done in a "Think Big" moment. For years the motorway system in Auckland had me thinking there must have been some dodgy deals struck at the time. But it's all OK now though, eh?.

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,

    LB:

    "Would be a far better use of everyone’s time than getting the accountant to dig ditches badly for 200 hours?"

    If an accountant is digging ditches I'm sure they can charge people money to sit round watching in deck chairs, with a few beers and recoup the money owing pretty quickly.

    So that proves it then; Community Service is all about punishment rather than actually doing the community any, um, service.

    Garth McV would be proud.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • dubmugga,

    I have a hunch that the reason they don't let you in is you're a giant cock.

    i too have always suspected penis envy...

    ...so does that hunch qualify you for disabled parking ?

    the back of your mind • Since Nov 2006 • 257 posts Report Reply

  • Thomas Johnson,

    To be fair, Timaru did actually remove all the parking meters from the main street.

    Did Luke come to visit?

    Wellington • Since Oct 2007 • 98 posts Report Reply

  • steven crawford,

    But why they built it as a loop, and part of a 900m State Highway, I don't know.

    Tourist attraction?

    Port Timaru, sporting some mighty tuff looking boats, was one of the high lights of our south island ports, school holiday tour. Its got a melancholy bleakness that that road takes you to.

    Atlantis • Since Nov 2006 • 4411 posts Report Reply

  • Marcus Turner,

    Regarding Timaru: does anyone know whatever happened to the Cock and Pullet? It was a wonderful place to stop.

    Since Nov 2006 • 212 posts Report Reply

  • Raymond A Francis,

    Regarding Timaru: does anyone know whatever happened to the Cock and Pullet? It was a wonderful place to stop.

    It changed hands (a couple of ex school teachers set it up) a few years ago and went down hill rapidly

    45' South • Since Nov 2006 • 577 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Poole,

    oh - a "sub arachnoid haemorrhage" is a real thing - initially I figured you were just pulling (all 8 of) their legs

    It surely is a real thing. At least, it is if my father's death certificate is to be believed. You'd be thinking of a sub-arachnid haemorrhage when it comes to pulling many legs :)

    Auckland • Since Mar 2007 • 4097 posts Report Reply

  • Sam F,

    Hey, respect! And here was me thinking that Alan Gibbs started this whole privately owned giraffe thing. You've certainly been pushing back the envelope from an early age.

    Wow, the Big Day Out at the Farm, where we discover what Gibbs, Brash and Douglas would do were they dictator for a year... oh, to be a fly on the tasteful and impeccably finished wall.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1609 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    You'd be thinking of a sub-arachnid haemorrhage when it comes to pulling many legs

    The Sub Arachnoid membrane derives its name from its similarity to a Spiders Web and those that know me will know how I know that.

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    oh, to be a fly on the tasteful and impeccably finished wall.

    I hereby pledge $25 towards ticket and disguise costs for Keith Ng, and challenge others to do the same.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Sam F,

    I hereby pledge $25 towards ticket and disguise costs for Keith Ng, and challenge others to do the same.

    Just what I was thinking. Anyone else?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1609 posts Report Reply

  • John Quinn,

    Going back to HOS editorials...

    Remember reading many years ago in the "Waiheke Resident" the comment by editor Gordon Ingham that the ink used in Herald editorials was poisonous if applied to the bare skin.

    Thought it couldn't be too good for the eyes as well so haven't read one since.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 15 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Stephen Judd/Sam F- yessss! Count me in.

    (This was most horrific-sounding conference based in ANZ I've *ever* heard of-)

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    But why they built it as a loop, and part of a 900m State Highway, I don't know.

    the main reason it is a loop i think is to deal with the steep drop from the bluff/hill above down onto the flat at Caroline Bay and wharf area (and I guess to avoid the need for noisy air brakes in the middle of town) - so gentle sweeping loop reduces gradient and speed, the best way possible in a limited space - clever really...
    not something you'd want to go down at breakneck speed on a giraffe though... :- )

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7943 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    The really sad thing, Ian, is that I stopped talking because otherwise I was going to share "interesting" facts about Timaru's surveying and road layout (and also giraffe photos), and then I'd be one of those tragic Internet People.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • steven crawford,

    (and also giraffe photos)

    Please, please show us the photos, I will show you my movember?

    Atlantis • Since Nov 2006 • 4411 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Please, please show us the photos, I will show you my movember?

    Dodgy as that sounds, I think it's too good to pass up.

    Toddles

    He had little black wheels, too. And puddling around tonight, I found the Timaru District Council webcam. Look, that's my home town in nearly real time. I dunno if I feel nostalgic or slightly ill. But you can see the road I rode him down.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    -Awwwww

    (both kid & giraffe - emphatically NOT the TDC webcam)

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Just thinking,

    Cute.

    Is it the Hydo or the Grand in the last couple of camera shots? It's in danger anyways - notice the crows nest - cool.

    I quite like the idea of open access CCTV (an oxy - but I'm tired) as opposed to a Police only access thing.

    Putaringamotu • Since Apr 2009 • 1158 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    Dodgy as that sounds, I think it's too good to pass up.

    Toddles

    Too, too cute with you little chubby cheeks.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

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