Speaker by Various Artists

Mindless rant against crap attitudes

by Mark Graham


Enough rose-tinted spectacle stuff. I mean, it’s nice but you eventually want something with an edge to it to keep you sharp. And, of course, there’s an abundance of it about:

What is it with lazy dog owners who can’t be arsed picking up their dog’s poo like the rest of us?

What’s with the attitude of jaywalkers staring you down when you almost run them over while they saunter across the road (Hell-o. Roads are for motorised vehicles and 2 tonne of steel vs 70kgs of flesh is a one-sided duel.)

Bastard drivers who run red lights. Not orange-going-on-red. RED, as in STOP. If one of those pricks hits me as I take off, I’m dead. I rather resent the possibility.

Stagecoach drivers parking their buses so the backside takes up half a lane and blocks all the traffic at peak hour. Very considerate.

Stagecoach drivers with buses discharging toxic waste into the atmosphere... and my face. In fact, any driver that discharges toxic waste because they’re too lazy/cheap/ignorant to get their car/truck/van tuned up.

People who lack the simple courtesy of “Thank You” and “Please”.

Rude drivers who refuse to let you cross into their lane so you can escape the mania of our motorways.

People who drop rubbish. The other day I say three middle-class late teens carefully place coke bottles and empty fast food bags on the steps of a CBD office building, 50 metres from a rubbish bin. That they were walking towards.

People who don’t pick rubbish up.

John Banks.

Bill English, who suggests penalising beneficiaries who don’t ensure their kids go to school but doesn’t know how many there actually are who have this problem (but it’s not really beneficiary bashing).

The National Party generally, who seem to think that the only way to beat Labour is by taking over the redneck vote from ACT and NZ First.

New Zealanders, who seem to be buying it (National support up 8% to 28% at the expense of the smaller parties).

The US Government. Did anybody else see 24 the other night? How’s this for a far-fetched scenario: A group of shadowy American oil tycoons allow a terrorist group to explode a nuke in LA so they can lay the blame on some dodgy (but in this instance, blameless) Arab states so the US invades and they take over the oil. Never happen.

And it’s my birthday today and I’m still at work.

But here’s the thing. The irritation and the laziness and the lack of responsibility and the greed and the ignorance (bliss perhaps, but no excuse) are part of the human condition. Raging against it is as futile as, well, cutting off your nose...

But I hate it. And I will fight it. And fight it and fight it. Because we can be so much better. And I will get older.

There, rant over for the day.