How dull is Pop’s Ultimate Star? I nearly killed myself watching Rosita sing “Rehab” and immediately had to go and play the real thing and the remix. Also, my kids now officially hate PUS, because a repeat ep has replaced the Sunday morning cartoons that they’d been watching – and even TVNZ’s own website didn’t have the amendment to the schedules last week. Yu-Gi-Oh, I am reliably informed, was balanced on a knife-edge, with Joey Wheeler possibly about to go down to a mystery player in Kaiba’s new tournament. You bastards!
TVNZ has announced that its new digital channels will be called TVNZ 6 and TVNZ 7, their numbers on the Freeview remote. With the New Zild accent, they better be careful that the former channel doesn’t come out as “TVNZ sux” and they should definitely avoid Australian accents as well. “TVNZ sex”? That just wouldn’t be right.
General praise all round for Flight of the Conchords. EW’s Popwatch liked it; also check out the comments.
June 23-29
Saturday
• English “Western” Once Upon a Time in the Midlands is on TV1; it gets a seven from Philip Matthews.
• Altogether grislier Western, the Nick Cave-penned The Proposition is on Sky Movies 1. Philip gave it a nine.
• Searching for the Wrong Eyed Jesus is on the Documentary Channel.
Sunday
• Sunday (TV1) has stories about Folole Muliaga’s death; a special needs school in Oz; and photographer Frank Habicht (film-maker Florian’s dad).
• Simon Schama (TV1) does Picasso.
• Stephen Sondheim, Peter Bogdanovich, Andy Dick and Meg Ryan are on The “All New” Simpsons (TV3). The show has reached its 400th episode.
• Greer Robson in her best role: Smash Palace is on Maori (eight from Philip).
Monday
• We’re now seeing episodes of Men in Trees that haven’t screened in the US yet. Crikey.
• Prime snuck Extras into the schedule without telling anyone; Orlando Bloom’s in the first ep.
• Johnny Depp and musical guests The Spinners are on Letterman.
Tuesday
• Seventeen-year-old Hunter McKay gets into bed with a stripper and a porn star on Shortie (TV2). Ha ha! Fooled ya – it’s a photo shoot, silly.
• New GBLT (gay, bi, les, trans) The Outlook starts on TV2 laaate at night.
• It’s House’s antepenultimate episode on TV3; same with Boston Legal – Shore has a speech about America “not letting little things like the law stand in our way” while defending a man who was jailed at Guantanamo Bay.
• NBAS commentator Charles Barkley, actor Seth Rogen and musical guest Michael Martin Murphey are on Letterman.
Wednesday
• The beginning of the end for Lost (TV2), with the first part of the two-part ending. Also, ER finals; someone gets hurt of course.
• Prison Break also ends; EW’s Ken Tucker thought it had lost its way, although it was the TV3 competition that kicked The Sopranos’ ass last year. Robert Wisdom, who was the police chief who “legalised drugs” in The Wire has been cast for season three.
• Bruce Willis, Big Brother host Julie Chen and “diving dogs on 53rd Street” are on Letterman.
• Talking Movies is on BBC World at 9.30pm.
Thursday
• Read this and this after tonight's ep of The Sopranos.
• Inside New Zealand (TV3) is about food additives.
• Is anyone watching Standoff (TV3) now that it's up against The Sopranos? Maybe: Fox has ordered more eps.
• Documentary movie Murderball is on Rialto.
Friday
• The bitches are back, and I’m not talking about the return of Footballers’ Wives at 9.35pm. Trinny & Susannah Undress (TV1) puts hapless couples through the T&S wringer.
• Second series of Waterloo Road starts on TV1, but if you thought it was difficult making a hospital look sexy, try a school.
• Here’s the Footballers’ Wives website, but read after viewing, the episode run-downs are quite comprehensive. Joan Collins is in the series as a gossip magazine editor who is, of course, evil.
• Read this after tonight’s final of Supernatural (TV2); season two has already finished in the US and season three has a guest-star from – OMG! – cylon babe Tricia Helfer.
• Smallville (TV2) finals too – the TwoP recapper is funny.
• Early Doors is on UKTV at 10.00pm.